Talk:Elwin McGhee/Archive

I love the work @elwin_mcghee put in for the Lift's first season and would use that as a foundation. They don't have DMs open so I'm just trying to keep things in the spirit of a character they've fleshed out already.

McGhee is a being made entirely of clarified butter, kept solid through even the most heated of competitions through sheer force of will. Their can-do attitude is considered to be the force that emulsifies the Lift, though their disposition turns sour when reporters ask if an alternate Elwin made from removed milk solids exists.

Elwin Draft

Elwin McGhee is a sentient being composed mostly of grass-fed butter. He typically takes the form of a dog (breed and size varies) or a block of butter about the size of a refrigerator. The butter Elwin is composed of is most similar in chemical makeup to ghee, a clarified butter invented in India. This butter has a low melting point, which can cause Elwin to liquify during particularly warm weather.

This does not seem to bother Elwin at all, and he has been seen enthusiastically finishing team practice sessions as a puddle.

Elwin was recruited to the team by Val Hitherto, who accidentally attempted to use Elwin to butter his crumpet while on a brief vacation to the Butter Timeline. While in the Butter Timeline, Elwin worked as a bartender and a shepherd. He has been known to use his weekends to bartend or shepherd, so he doesn’t get rusty.

Elwin occasionally speaks with a terrible Cockney accent. There is no discernible reason for this, as Elwin has never been to Europe.

Prolonged contact between Elwin’s butter and inanimate objects has the odd side effect of granting said object life and sentience. This is inconvenient for Elwin, as gloves, sweatbands, and other objects he frequently comes into contact with often need to be replaced after escaping the locker room.

The most notable example of this is the granting of sentience to Concrete Mandible, fellow lift player and former statue. This was accidental, and happened because Mandible’s head was “a great napping spot,” according to Elwin.

Mandible and Elwin remain good friends to this day, and Mandible will still occasionally take a nap with Elwin on its head.