YS-320

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COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Yellowstone National Park

National Park Services Standardized Irregularity Report

Documenting Researcher: Researcher Deluca


Irregularity Designation: YS-320 (“It’s always sunny in Yellowstone”)

Irregularity Class: NATIVE (Pending)

Park Management Protocol: An inquiry is to be sent to representatives of the Apsáalooke people regarding the nature and significance of YS-320. Until then, all official maps of Yellowstone National Park are to be updated to include the location and area of effect of YS-320, and mark it as off-limits. Additionally, Park Rangers are to patrol the area around YS-320 to prevent trespass. Should the site prove safe for habitation plans are to be made to open the location for tourism, pending Apsáalooke approval.

Irregularity Description: YS-320 is a circular area approximately 3 meters in diameter that exists within the Mirror Plateau region of the park. Any living being that enters into this area will spontaneously declare “Boy, Today sure is a good day for Blaseball!” in Apsáalooke, the native language of the Apsáalooke people, irregardless of the being’s knowledge of the language, the splort of Blaseball, their capacity for speech, or if it is, in fact, a good day for Blaseball. Beings normally incapable of speech, such as most fauna, will be capable of repeating this phrase while within the area of effect and will commonly do so in place of usual vocalizations, such as barking.

Additional Notes: We found YS-320 after some park guests reported weird chanting coming from the area. We weren’t aware of any druidic rituals taking place that day, so Ranger O’toole was sent down there to check things out when he came under its effect. He mapped out the rough area of it and passed the info along to us, where we started poking at it. Interestingly, it does appear to be literally any living being; we brought a potted plant into the area and sure enough it shouted that out. We still aren’t sure where the sound is actually coming from- humans will move their lips like they’re saying it properly, and it’ll be in their voice, but beings without any vocal chords or lips at all will still emit the sound. Could be a really neat tourist attraction though, everyone loves talking animals.