Topic on Talk:Legscraper

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The Legscraper


The Legscraper is the Tokyo Lift's stadium and home. The influences of the formerly deific legs it is built on and the mysterious cave system above which it is often stationed have turned the dumbbell-shaped skyscraper into a (relatively) benevolent entity. Members of the Lift can navigate the ever-shifting hallways and empty rooms of the tower with little problem, and fans are channelled straight to the elevators leading to the rooftop stadium. Visiting teams and certain other groups, however, may become hopelessly lost until discovered by Lift staff; one party of Dilsney executives became trapped in an office-supplies cupboard for seventeen days, surviving on glue sticks and fluid squeezed from anti-static screen wipes. The origins of the Legscraper are known to few. Although the Lazarus Pit is now common knowledge in certain circles, the legs that support the Legscraper are dismissed as products of Dilsneyland Tokyo or an aspect of the Pit. The only ones aware of the Legscraper's true nature are players Nandy Slumps, Stijn Strongbody, and Knight Triumphant.


The land that became home to the Legscraper was already notable before Walt Dilsney bought and half-built a theme park over it, and it is strongly speculated that Dilsney chose this location because of the pit’s presence.


Documented by the avid splortsman known only as Mehashirou during the Kamakura Period (and named by the Walt Dilsney Corporation), the Lazarus Pit is an underground cavern and associated body of water containing magic that encourages fitness and health. Prior to Dilsney’s creation of a second manmade entrance, the only known passage into the Pit was a submerged sea cave in the Tokyo Bay. Situated at the nexus of a complex cave system the Pit’s isolation combined with the water’s unique properties have resulted in a rich ecosystem of endemic bioluminescent organisms, including several members of the genus Cyrtomium and three distinct genera of Salmonidae.


Before Blaseball was even an idea, Nandy Slumps was killing gods with Knight Triumphant. In the still-extant Moab Desert, a quarry of theirs would be split up in an effort to make it impossible for it to ravage the land once more. Nandy, in particular, took the legs. Still ambulatory and seeking its parts, Nandy decided to cut off a toe under the assumption that it would seek nearer parts first. Her gamble paid off, and she used the toe as bait to lead it across the Pacific, eventually burying it in the caves that, unbeknownst to her, contained the Lazarus Pit.


As professional Blaseball beckoned, Slumps eventually abandoned the legs in a shady grove, expecting them to decay and in time to be forgotten. Instead they were preserved by the Pit's magics. When the Dilsney Corporation took ownership of the locale in 19XX, the mighty limbs became the centrepiece of themed area "Leg-o-Land", home to attractions including Ankle Biters soft play and the short-lived Thigh Will Be Done bistro. Park staff deployed to this area reported symptoms such as rampant muscle growth, raging thirst and cataracts, but were dismissed by Dilsney executives as "paranoid malingerers". The park failed spectacularly, and in 1997, it was abandoned.


When Slumps won the title deeds to the abandoned Dilsneyland park in an unsanctioned backroom Mahjong tournament she was not aware of its history. Her first site visit revealed the truth; the awesome, uncorrupted legs lay at the focal point of the park, ripe for development. Well aware of the pressures facing residents of Tokyo she had already considered developing the locale for rent-free social housing. The legs would in time become the centrepiece of the development, crowned by a futuristic skyscraper housing healthcare and leisure facilities serving the community. Thus, the Legscraper was born.