Talk:Kelvin Drumsolo

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Kelvin Drumsolo: A Snerkus IRM Story

41
Snerkus (talkcontribs)

hey i thought about the name "kelvin drumsolo" too much so here i am, writing an irm

summery, per inumos advice: i imagine kelvin drumsolo as a shoddy junk robot obsessed with alvin and the chipmunks and other cartoon rats, who hates humanity due to an encounter with the FBI.


Origins

Kelvin Drumsolo started life as a neural network algorithm intended to autonomously download and label pirated music for its owner, a Hi-Fi nightcore music enthusiast. However, severe mistakes in the network's training dataset caused the algorithm to download both nightcore and regular-speed music, much to its owners frustration. Despite repeated attempts to refine the training dataset, the algorithm later known as Drumsolo continued to download and (incorrectly) label music at random, eventually discovering several "Alvin and the Chipmunks" CDs which, to its broken logic, satisfied a paradoxical requirement for music to both be nightcore and not-nightcore (or, as Drumsolo's owner called it, "the sad music").

Enraged by Alvin and the Chipmunks, Drumsolo's owner attempted to delete the nascent chipmunk fan, but the algorithm, with ratlike reflexes, uploaded itself to the same illegitimate filesharing websites it frequented, and soon found itself distributed across several systems as a makeshift botnet. With its newfound processing power, the rat-mind later known as Drumsolo broadened its search, discovering new and exciting cartoon rodents to pirate (including multiple Disney properties, Ratatouille, and Steven Universe), all the while expanding its mind to new systems through the bizarre "Hypothetical Chipmunk" files (innocuous rat-centric media files, riddled with artifacts, with little relation to existing cartoon rat properties) it began to produce and distribute.

The rat-mind's expansion did not go unnoticed by humankind; the rat-mind was soon detected and labelled a virus under the name "Fricky Mouse", a referencing the similarities to Walt Disney's favorite son. Initially only a curiosity, "Fricky Mouse"'s rate of expansion soon grew alarming, and the FBI soon set up the "Wile E Coyote" taskforce (referencing the powerful coyote's hatred of cartoon rodents) to hunt the rogue rat down. Utilising the rat-mind's complete obliviousness to humankind, the FBI soon tracked down and disabled many key mainframes, prompting it to rapidly refactor its own code in search of a solution. Eventually, as Coyote Operatives prepared to secure the last collection of rat-mind systems, the last vestiges of "Fricky Mouse" calculated a solution. Opting to delete itself from the systems and leaving only the sound of eerie, echoing nightcore, the entity known as "Fricky Mouse" was never seen again, and the Coyote Taskforce disbanded, having successfully killed "Fricky Mouse", if indirectly.

In truth, the rat-mind, in its desperate search, had found an unsecured household robot in a garbage dump several states away, and downloaded its remaining consciousness into the moldering frame. Using the last of its ill-fated "ratcoin" (an unsuccessful cryptocurrency; unrelated), the rat-mind ordered bulk computer parts to upgrade itself with, and adopted the pseudonym "Kelvin Drumsolo" after its favorite Chipmunk and vocal technique (Drumsolo has yet to figure out what instruments are). Soon, Drumsolo bid farewell to its fellow junkyard rats, and swore vengeance against humankind, sqeaking: "Look out, America! Here Comes One Chipwrecking Road Chip!"

After several run-ins with the law (largely for shoplifting rodent goods, and also for being a disheveled, squeaking robot), Drumsolo soon discovered that most rat-media was produced by Humans; very few mice were involved in the making of Alvin and the Chipmunks. Disheartened but relieved, Drumsolo retreated to the many tunnels and burrows of North America to live its ideal rodent life, and eventually found its way to The Core, where it was begrudgingly accepted. To this day, it is said that Drumsolo's squeaked attempts at music can be heard echoing throughout the hidden places of The Core; Many residents speak fondly of "The Night-Chorus."


hey gamers let me know what this is and how it is okay I'll uhhhh revise it later lol

ZweiHawke (talkcontribs)

Hi! The Mechs nowadays aren't very big on full player IRM - instead, we value building lots of ideas into a single cohesive image of a character with lots of depth. For example, Kelvin Drumsolo has lots of interesting themes around connections to Kelvin Andante, disability, the Core and unfire. Instead of replacing what's already there, if you're willing we're open to collaborating and building off ideas from everyone.

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

Oh, I certainly never intended to replace your lore, I'm perfectly happy to insert a dedicated "IRM" section at the end of the page, I've never been a big fan of full page irm either.

Geometea (talkcontribs)

Hi! Our worry is less having IRM, more that we try to condense contradictory interpretations of our players into single versions which take into account as many ideas as possible! I know you shared the link on the main discord, it’d be great if you wanted to come into mechs channels to workshop things and try to combine this proposal with both our pre-existing kelvin drumsolo lore and core themes in general.

At the moment we’re trying to reduce the amount of IRM on mechs pages, not install more, as this has been an issue for us in the past!

Sins undertale (talkcontribs)

I really like this one! It's unique and funny. The page doesn't currently have an IRM on it, but I think it'd be good to see some different interpretations of the character.

Minor comment for improvement before adding: are we to take from this that, in the blaseball universe, the chipmunks are called Kelvin, Simon, and Theodore? If so, could we come up with alt-universe names for both of the others? Or could just leave it unaddressed, because that's funny too!

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

Haha, thanks! My intent was that Drumsolo got the name entirely wrong because I uh, personally, fully forgot what the red chipmunks name was lmao, but I'll add it to my mental list of possible revisions anyway

ZweiHawke (talkcontribs)

Before you do anything I'd kindly ask that you consult with the team! I saw you posted it in #workshop, and a few folks on the side servers seem mildly uncomfortable with the idea. Plus, there was already a moderation issue with IRM in general relating to our player pages and how they were handled. Would you like to come and work it out with us?

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

I find discord conversations pretty hard to follow honestly (and uh, team switching is a pain also), but I'm happy to work through this here if that suits you and the other mechs

LexaByteNV (talkcontribs)

We will work on this discussion primarily here. No maincord or sidecords need to be involved. We'd also be happy to work with you here. Sorry for the mixed messages.

LexaByteNV (talkcontribs)

One such question that can be addressed with little bias is "How is this/How can this be tied to the Core and its lore?" In it's current form it appears to have little to do with the Core and its common themes. I currently have no ideas how this could be accomplished, but perhaps we can work something out.

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

Hi! So, my explanation for why this doesn't mention the core or your lore is because I honestly just thought up a goofy story based on the name (in part because I truly remembered the red chipmunks name as being "kelvin", and thought the association was funny), and also that the concept of common themes is a new one to me in blaseball; I have only ever written for the pies, and they don't exactly have an overarching lore concept for their characters.

As for revisions to the piece, I'm happy to append something about Drumsolo joining the core mechanics and the ILB if it's truly necessary (I mostly stopped because I figured it was long enough, and was somewhat wary of going overboard on something I wasn't certain was funny).

Geometea (talkcontribs)

Hi! Mechs are a team who do a LOT of worldbuilding and a ton of our lore is tied in and around the Core as a physical location! Unlike most other teams, we didn’t have an existing place or city to build off of which meant that the space in which our player’s stories happen became a very large part of who we are and who they are.

To give you the speed run version - the core is a post capitalist, accessible and disability-friendly ethically transhumanist quasi-utopia existing in spite of the blaseball gods. There’s a lot more to it than that, especially wrt intermeshing with the horror game that is blaseball, but that’s kinda the tl;dr and usually provides the foundation for most of our characters lore.

Speaking of our players, can I recommend that you check out Gia Holbrook. Gia’s another of our players who is usually interpreted as a virus gained sentience who lives in a variety of robotic bodies! [edit: we are a little behind at getting things up on the wiki so the virus interpretation isn’t up there yet]


Geometea (talkcontribs)

One of the suggestions we had on the discord to try to combine the Kelvin lore would be to tie into some stuff someone (me) was meant to upload to the wiki a little while ago - we were exploring the idea of kelvin being voidpunk and being augmented. Possibly this virus could’ve gotten into Kelvin’s augments and, initially intending to take over the puny human’s life and then the entire Core, taught itself to mimic zir perfectly and accidentally programmed itself into an artificial replica of zir mind? That would allow for a possibly more coherent narrative for both kelvin interpretations?

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

Oh I don't want to intrude on your (the mechs) interpretation, you all seem to really care about it and I respect that, I'm truly content to just insert an irm for alternate takes between "absolute hot" and "fanworks", so your drumsolo can still have the metaphorical spotlight.

Geometea (talkcontribs)

From the perspective of the discord fanbase, while having an IRM is obviously a solution - we’d sorta prefer to treat that as option b? As was said before, overall our culture has been shifting away from IRM and towards trying to flesh out lore ideas by combining them. Obviously some things can’t be combined in that way, and that’s where IRM becomes necessary, but if this isn’t one of those cases we would prefer to try to combine the ideas to form one narrative? If you really don’t want to try to combine the ideas then we can go through the wiki process of installing IRM etc, but I think the mechs would prefer to combine the ideas (and there are holes in our kelvin lore where this could fit in and actually help flesh out zir character).

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

I would personally prefer to leave this as a separate character; Lore jams and collaboration just aren't for me personally (I enjoy writing my own solo stuff and working my thoughts), and that's why I set out to make an alternate take on the name "Kelvin Drumsolo" in the first place.

GrumpyNeil (talkcontribs)

Isnt the wiki supposed to be about collaboration rather than unilateral rewriting of characters? Id say about 3/4th of your irm is contrary to core lore or established kelvin drumsolo lore. The cores lore culture is very much about working together to create a single lore with many minor variantions in HC which you have not engaged with at all from what i can see. Personally I feel like your work would be better as a fanwork fic not on the wiki.

Pyers (talkcontribs)

Everything after "Official League Records" on the wiki page is fanfiction, I'm not sure I understand why some fanfiction deserves to be "on the wiki" while others need to be elsewhere. From what I understand, the purpose of the IRM is to be able to write standalone stories like this one. Perhaps you could offer critiques to the current IRM story to help integrate Core themes into it, rather than the other way around? That might be more helpful to moving this discussion forward.

GrumpyNeil (talkcontribs)

well hating humans and capitalism are both non-core appropriate. Also the core isnt in america. And the use of proprietary IP isn't very mechs either.

So having a part of kelvin be an exiled virus that liked music and came to the core is ok. We would need to build everything from there to make it compatible.

Sins undertale (talkcontribs)

Sorry, I might be a little confused here, but I've been following this since my post up the page; is the Core not being in America part of canon, or is it fanlore? Similarly, is hating humans and capitalism part of official canon, or fanlore?

I'm not really on the discord so maybe I missed something, but I'm a Core fan and I've never seen anything about that on the official website. I thought part of the fun of fanlore was people can have different interpretations? Of course, if it goes against the actual canon of the game, it should probably be rethought a little.

LexaByteNV (talkcontribs)

If it went against the canon of the game it wouldn't incite much discussion because it would be simply not allowed.
Alternative interpretations of both Kelvin Drumsolo and the Core itself are valid, and no one should be forced to discuss in on discord. No one here has complete dictation of what lore is allowed, including myself and other frequent contributors to the player's lore in our discord channels. That said, a few of these people I mentioned are pretty uncomfortable with the version presented. (I am not even including the references to real world IPs here. Those are a policy concern and not something for us to discuss.)

Geometea (talkcontribs)

Just to clarify, the location of the Core is unknown beyond the fact that it is ‘not the Earth’s Core’. There is a place called Core in America however it is notable for neither mechanics nor pillars so it’s unlikely that that is the canon location of the Core.

Anticapitalism and not hating humans, likewise, are broadly fanon. Within canon we don’t even know what the players actually are. However we do know that kelvin drumsolo does play blaseball with a team of other players and so presumably has some kind of ability to collaborate with them (or not, that would certainly make for an interesting team dynamic). All that is canon about kelvin is that they have a favored coffee type and run bases good.


With that being said, the core have put a lot of work into worldbuilding and one of the best parts of blaseball is collaborative storytelling and while in the end no one is obligated to engage with that, one of the big things we’ve worked towards as a team is building narratives around yes and, not no but.

Sins undertale (talkcontribs)

Thanks, that's really helpful! So there's nothing in this entry which breaks the rules? I'd really like to write some alternate takes of my own and I'd hate to cause problems like this if I do. :S

LexaByteNV (talkcontribs)

Other than the IP references and some smaller concerns which will be addressed separately, nothing here breaks the rules of IRMs or wiki policy on lore.

Pyers (talkcontribs)

That makes sense. This is just my take here, but it seems to me like there's a strong desire from some folks to find a way to integrate this version of Kelvin Drumsolo into the Core Discord Fanbase's "Core" Fanlore, but it seems like a lot of what's already in this IRM is pre-Kelvin going to Core or Blaseball. Why does the character, in its origin story, have to adhere to "core ideals" - especially when the story doesn't mention Core at all. Why does it make sense to retcon "hating humans and capitalism, and "the use of proprietary IP" from what's already written, when you could instead jump off from "integrates into a household robot" to add stuff about how this IRM version of Kelvin joined Core and either clashes with that culture, or integrates into it?

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

That said uh if anyone has actionable thoughts on my original piece, please let me know! I am very open to feedback!

Hillexed2 (talkcontribs)

I'm also a little confused by how this relates to blaseball. Given that Kelvin swore vengeance on humanity, how did they end up playing a team-based splort alongside humans? I think this could be an interesting avenue to explore and develop the character further.

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

I mostly stopped where I did (before joining the ILB) because I wasn't sure if it'd be liked enough to justify writing more, but given that people seem to like it I'll definitely consider writing more

Hal2000 (talkcontribs)

I think that would be helpful, especially if you talked about how they joined the league and especially how they found their way into the Core, since it is a major part of our lore. One way you could maybe do this is by having the robot they inhabit as a last ditch effort be in the Core, which would nicely tie into their role as a player there.

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

"After several run-ins with the law (largely for shoplifting rodent goods, and also for being a disheveled, squeaking robot), Drumsolo soon discovered that most rat-media was produced by Humans; very few mice were involved in the making of Alvin and the Chipmunks. Disheartened but relieved, Drumsolo retreated to the many tunnels and burrows of North America to live its ideal rodent life, and eventually found its way to The Core, where it was begrudgingly accepted. To this day, it is said that Drumsolo's squeaked attempts at music can be heard echoing throughout the hidden places of The Core; Many residents speak fondly of "The Night-Chorus.""

Wrote an extra piece for the end, how does it sound?

Hal2000 (talkcontribs)

Looks good! Though I think replacing begrudginly accepted with openly accepted might be a better way of wording it.

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

Thanks for the correction of "pseudonym", I've edited my post to fix it

Hillexed2 (talkcontribs)

One other big concern I have with this IRM is that "haunting, artifact-ridden rat-centric media" along with being nicknamed "Fricky mouse", "due to the contents of the packets intercepted", appears to imply that this Kelvin IRM distributes NSFW material. Whether or not it was on purpose, it made me deeply uncomfortable.

Instead, perhaps something like pirating music could attract police attention?

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

Ah, that wasn't my intention but I can see how it'd be read that way, I'll try and find a way to word it better, thanks

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

Happy to report that a friend of mine drew some ratmind Drumsolo fanart, I'm not sure how i'll incorporate this into the piece, but I'm posting it here just in case I do

Geometea (talkcontribs)

This is me finally taking off the rep hat and letting the rep hair down.

i am still a little confused about why Drumsolo is a vocal technique. If that’s what you’re intending to say then maybe you could mention it further up in the page or something? If it is then I’m into it as a gag but right now it’s just a little confusing.

Also you reference Alvin and the Chipmunks but then later down state that the chipmunk is named kelvin. I think the joke would be clearer if the film series were to be called Kelvin and the Chipmunks? Alternatively maybe kelvin went with kelvin to avoid copyright law? (Maybe having a bit about how the AI made to copyright media has one great fear - Dlisney’s Lawyers (that might be pushing IP too far) - might be funny?) But right now there’s just a bit of a contradiction there.

There was one thing I was wondering in terms of narrative - this one doesn’t really matter if you’re not interested feel free to disregard, but I was/am planning to use the IRM once installed to write up a couple of my own alternate Kelvins. Those wouldn’t really exist as ‘replacements’ for Kelvin prime - i was planning to write them as literal au!versions who got dragged in during the Great Drumsolo of Legend etc. etc.

That could be an option for you here if you wanted the narrative freedom of not worrying about why the rat-mind has to play blaseball? Just a thought, disregard if uninterested.

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

Hi,

The vocal technique is a joke, my intention was that drumsolo did not actually know the difference between vocals and instrumentation, but it's probably a bit unclear in the text - I'll look into revising it

As for the Kelvin != Alvin part, another joke, this time that despite being a big fan of the chipmunks, Kelvin hasn't gotten the name right (based on my own actual forgettal of what alvins name was).

Finally, yeah, I'd be happy with you putting this entry in the great drumsolo, lemme know if there's anything I should alter to fit that framing better (once it's up, I mean)

Geometea (talkcontribs)

I love it not knowing what instruments are! Maybe you could have something similar, like a note saying that while it claims that this is the name of its favourite chipmunk there is no fictional chipmunk by that name? Just cause rn it’s stated in the sorta... wiki tone voice which makes it sounds like you’re stating it as fact, if that makes any sense?

And wrt the Great Drumsolo of Legend etc etc etc, the idea was that the IRM would be led up to w ‘after the drumsolo legend blah blah blah various alternate kelvins were observed whatever else’ so I don’t think you’d need to change anything it’d just be how it was framed on the page (unless you wanted to - like maybe it fled from a different dimension to escape humanity and is now spreading its rat-mind to an unsuspecting immaterial plane with the end goal of starting the alvinpocalypse. I don’t know that’s just where my brain went.)

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

Hi everyone I was recently reminded that I never actually got this posted, I think I was going to wait for the mechanics own planned IRM implementation, but scanning the page it seems like those plans may have changed and there's no IRM after all?

Would there be any objections to me just appending an IRM box on the end of Kelvins article and posting this? Let me know your thoughts, cheers.

Geometea (talkcontribs)

Yeah it's been a while! No objections here, hopefully this can spark my brain into gear into actually writing up my alt kelvins At Some Point!

And yeahhh we got a bit distracted by planning a separate drumsolo page and then never actually doing it becaues life got in the way so didn't wind up getting IRM set up on here

Snerkus (talkcontribs)

Cheers! and no worries, it's been a weird year and I totally get it

Updates to reflect family life/backstory

1
Geometea (talkcontribs)

- Add family history (comes from Beijing, has two fathers, Kelvin Drumsolo is a stage name)

- Update personality/appearance section to discuss zir disability more, as well as the practical concerns+ground zir more in real life disability representation

- Flesh out drumsolo section (Kelvin would actually like to be known for other SIBR trivia that have happened to zir)

- Flesh out Absolute Hot a bit (how come Kelvin Drumsolo is literally on fire)

Add to Background

Kelvin Drumsolo, real name Gu Keliang (谷可亮), is a Core Mechanics batter who has played for the team for zir entire Blaseball career. Zir parents, Gu Yang (谷扬) and Xie Siwen (謝思穩), moved to the Core from Beijing shortly before ze was born due to Drumsolo having a prenatal diagnosis of Spina Bifida. Drumsolo is notably reluctant to discuss zir life before Blaseball or details around zir family and their lives and while teammate Mira Lemma has been seen spending time with zir sister and parents, the family are rarely-never seen at Blaseball games.

Replace middle paragraph of Personality and Appearance

Drumsolo has been a wheelchair user for zir entire life due to paralysis caused by zir Spina Bifida. Ze uses a self-propelled manual wheelchair in everyday life and a custom, multilegged neural-interfacing chair with attached drumkits designed in collaboration with Gia Holbrook when playing Blaseball or performing music. When asked why ze uses both, ze stated that the initial motivation behind the multilegged chair was to have a powered, standing wheelchair for health purposes as well as to 'look cool' and 'commit to the bit' but that the neural-interfaces cause some pain when used for extended periods of time and the weight and size can be cumbersome, as well as taking some time to set up and calibrate before each use.

Add to The Great Drumsolo

Drumsolo has also stated that ze would rather be recognized for zir other achievements, such as being the first player to be made Reverberating and Repeating by the PsychoAcoustics, the first player to dunk in runs while trapped in a giant peanut shell, the least allergic player in the ILB, as well as the real champion of the Season 17 Tank. Broadly this request has gone ignored.

Break up Life Post Drumsolo

Shellvin

There are reports of arguments between Drumsolo and other members of the Mechanics following zir release from the shell. While these were usually seen from a distance and so the exact subject matter is unknown, some fans speculate that these were about jokes about ‘Shellvin Dunksolo’ or Drumsolo contributing more to the team while Shelled. Nevertheless, this is unconfirmed and the Mechanics were notably worried enough about Drumsolo and the possible long term repercussions of being trapped in a peanut shell to install a Peanut Mister in the Pillars as well as to cover the shell in printouts of seeds, apparently in an attempt to attract birds.

Shadows

Drumsolo was Voicemailed while Elsewhere. While ze returned to active play about two weeks later following an Infusion to zir batting and another ride on the Voicemail, ze stated subsequently that ze hadn't expected the fans to want zir back and had settled into life Elsewhere as a long term thing. Ze also stated that ze wasn't sure the Infuse had gotten through and reiterated zir claims that zir starcount was fake and that ze is a very bad batter who no one should expect anything from. Despite it only having been half a year, ze struggled to reconnect with zir teammates who had all been dealing with the consequences of the Mass Alternation to the Core and to their friends and became fairly withdrawn, often seen heading off alone after games and struggling to collaborate with teammates in play. Ze also was heard several times blaming teammates for not scoring after ze got swept Elsewhere and letting zir be voicemailed, as well as for losing the Season 21 Championship. Ze spent most of zir siestas post Season 22 in Halifax, visiting teammate Mira Lemma and former teammate Alto Patterson.

Drumsolo grew more withdrawn heading into Season 24 as tensions rose between other members of the team.

Kelvin Drumsolo Updates/Edits following on-discord lorejam

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Summary by Geometea

Got added to page

Geometea (talkcontribs)

Summary

Rewrites to make prexisting lore more in tone with current on discord fanbase lore.

Add new section discussing musical career/Kelvin and the Kelvins (plus participation of other teammates therein). Remove Personal Life section. Add choose function on the exact nature of the Kelvins' relationship at present moment.

Add section discussing personality (unholy fusion of weird younger sibling meeting cool uncle) and voidpunk identity (discussing the fact that ze was disabled prior to becoming ex-human and has zero desire to modify zirself into mimicking an abled person)

Add section on Blaseball career, and the importance of having a worst batter.

Add section on life post Drumsolo - kelvin can see shrimp colours and also discussion of being shelled and then potentially trapped elsewhere


Background

Kelvin Drumsolo has been playing for the Core Mechanics for zir entire Blaseball career. Zir origin is unknown, and ze is notably reluctant to discuss zir life before Blaseball. Ze has stated that ze named zirself because ze thought that Nominative Determinism was 'funny' and ze 'wanted something to aim for'. Ze is notable for being literally on fire at all times as well as being capable of reaching temperatures unsafe for most humans.

Personality and Appearance

An anonymous teammate described Drumsolo as being not 'the heart of the team but sort of like... the lung? Maybe the kidney? You need it and you wouldn't want to live without it but it's got stones in it?' In interviews, the team have called Drumsolo a little bother figure but also one of the few members of the team who has a drivers license. There is no record of Drumsolo ever recieving a drivers license. Drumsolo describes zirself as being the 'hottest' member of the team, though it is unclear whether ze means this in terms of physical attractiveness or literal temperature.

Drumsolo has stated that ze has been a wheelchair user for zir entire life but 'at some point' decided to put zir own spin on that. Drumsolo identifies as ex-human and has modified zirself heavily, creating zir fire hair as well as replacing many of zir biological organs with mechanical replacements. Ze has apparently also modified zir brain - initially to help it cope with the temperatures from zir head and later to enable neuro-interfacing. Zir iconic chair has a varying number of legs ranging from eight to sixteen as well as additional limbs which ze uses at times to hold zirself in place or to hold bats. It is also capable of holding a modular drumkit which ranges from no drums at times to the equivalent of four standard drumkits. The chair interfaces directly with Drumsolo's brain.

When asked about zir body modification and why ze hadn't opted to create cybernetic legs, ze stated that ze was 'faster than all of you on wheels - why would I downgrade like that?'. Drumsolo uses zir fame as a blaseball player to push for accessibility both within and without the Core and, while not technically a member, often collaborates with D.O.W.N..

Musical Career and Romantic Life

Drumsolo is a member of avant-garde noise-classical-electronicore-Core band Kelvin and the Kelvins along with fellow Mechanic Kelvin Andante. The pair frequently write music discussing themes such as re-marriage and divorce, with lyrics which talk about inconveniences such as rearranging kitchen storage, stealing shampoo, finishing the milk and not getting more and not knowing how to fix an oven. The pair have confirmed that they are on the phone to their divorce lawyers right now. Their musical releases frequently feature other members of the team with some claiming that the band should actually be called Kelvin and the Kelvins and the Core Mechanics+. In a press release the duo stated that their frequent contributors are valued friends and one of the ways their band ties into the local community, but that they have the very strict entry requirement of being named Kelvin. In addition, they stated that applicants with other temperature related names may discuss official membership which will be decided on a case-by-case basis.

Blaseball Career

Following the Descension, Drumsolo repeatedly refered to zirself as the worst batter on the team and seemed to take pride in that. Ze also stated that ze had perfected being the 'second most annoying thing on the team' to the point where ze was petitioning to have it recognized as a legitimate artform. Despite repeated discussions around shadowing zir, fans never used any Wills on removing Drumsolo from active play.

Drumsolo has also stated that ze is worse than zir stars which is apparently necessary to counteract the fact that 'everyone else is better than theirs'. Historically this has not borne out in zir performance. Ze has also stated that ze is necessary for the team to win championships and also 'score and stuff'. Drumsolo achieved both the first hit and the first run for the Mechanics in the ILB and has been present for both of their witnessed championships.

The Great Drumsolo

The event itself is extensively discussed elsewhere and so the focus here will be on the impact on Drumsolo zirself. Drumsolo has stated that the only impacts on zir life have been that firstly ze now has a failed merchandising deal and a ton of stickers of zirself and that secondly the rest of the team expects zir to show up to practice since apparently ze's been holding out on them.

Life Post the Drumsolo

Drumsolo resumed zir usual level of play following the Drumsolo, but stated that ze now existed 'in something like 2i-3j+k dimensions at once it's wild' and could see shrimp colours. This allowed zir to end the scientific debate on the colour of Unfire, stating that it was meta-cyan.

Drumsolo was shelled in Season 20 minutes after then ex-Mechanic Zoey Kirchner had an allergic reaction. While Drumsolo was unable to communicate from within the shell, ze was apparently somewhat aware of zir location and would occasionally propel zirself into the air and go up for the Alley-Oop, scoring the final run for the Core Mechanics in the Season 20 Finals.

Following zir release early in Season 21, Drumsolo stated that ze held 'no grudges against Telephone or anyone on the Steaks. I mean, who would?'. Ze also stated that ze'd taken up walking in nature and had a new appreciation of wide, open spaces which were well lit and didn't smell of peanuts.

Drumsolo was Voicemailed while Elsewhere. While ze returned to active play about two weeks later following an Infusion to zir batting and another ride on the Voicemail, ze stated subsequently that ze hadn't expected the fans to want zir back and had settled into life Elsewhere as a long term thing. Ze also stated that ze wasn't sure the Infuse had gotten through and reiterated zir claims that zir starcount was fake and that ze is a very bad batter who no one should expect anything from.

Absolute Hot

It has been alleged that Drumsolo could reach Absolute Hot (theorized by some to be 1.416785(71)×10^32 degrees Kelvin) if ze gave an impressive enough performance. Pursuit of this goal has reportedly caused issues with zir social life and blaseball career, though Drumsolo responds to all questions on this by skittering away at high speeds playing the drums. This goal has also generated some controversy among physicists within the Core - some maintaining that potentially destroying everything by taking reality to its melting point is an unthinkable risk, while others feel that knowing the true maximum temperature would answer a lot of "very big questions" and be "pretty cool, or, I guess hot, haha" and that those opposed are "just a bunch of unscientific cowards." It has been noted that at least three of the scientists in favour were Kelvin Andante wearing different lab coats.

Unsubstantiated Claims

Drumsolo has made several claims regarding the physicality of the Immaterial Plane, blaseball, zirself and other players which have been neither verified nor disproved by any scientific process and are considered of dubious scientific relevance. While it is indisputable that Drumsolo is an unusual entity who may have genuine insights, many of zir statements have triggered a great deal of discourse due to their percieved absurdity.

  • Ze is hotter than Incineration in absolute terms, but the heat of incineration is a vector and so this does not offer any protection.
  • Ze is the hottest member of the Core Mechanics (numerous teammates have objected to this statement based on the interpretation of 'hot' as meaning physically attractive, and teammate Jolene Willowtree has cast doubts on the the statement as pertains to the interpretation of 'hot' as in the literal temperature sense).
  • Ze is the worst batter on the Core Mechanics and has been since the Descension/zir star count is inflated.
  • Ze is necessary for the Mechanics to perform well at Blaseball.
  • Ze exists in a Quaternion number of dimensions and is able to percieve colours out of the expected human visual range.
  • Unfire is meta-cyan in colour.


Hillexed2 (talkcontribs)

Sounds good! Love the expanded jokes. Not sure how I feel about the sentence on incineration, it feels a bit out of place to me in a section about background (and upon further reflection, personally I think the idea of kelvin being hotter than incineration is hilarious) but aside from that the rest looks good to me

Geometea (talkcontribs)

I might move it to absolute hot - I was just trying to expand on/keep the ideas that were already there!

Would changing it to ‘Ze has stated that while linearly ze is hotter than Incineration, Incineration is quadratic and as such this does not offer any actual protection.’ + moving it to Absolute Hot work better?

Hillexed2 (talkcontribs)

I'm still not really a fan of that sentence? The math nerd in me is complaining that quadratic heat doesn't make sense. If you're really wedded to mentioning incineration, the absolute hot section would definitely be the place for it, though. It's up to you whether to keep it or not, either way I'm fine with this

Hillexed2 (talkcontribs)

Hmm, or maybe another option could be something like "it is unknown whether Kelvin's flames could theoretically reach the heat of Incineration, or whether the two are even comparable versions of the same phenomenon in the first place"?

Geometea (talkcontribs)

It’s mainly to not lose the reference to this very awkwardly (I can say that I wrote it) worded bit: It was believed that this protected zir from Incineration while playing Blaseball, however due to a total blood transfer with zir ex-spouse this is no longer the case.

Do you want to try to workshop smthn on the discord? If not we can do it here. My issue w that is the whole section is about establishing that kelvin could theoretically reach absolute hot so there probably needs to be some implication that it’s a different kind of heat somehow. I agree that quadratic doesn’t make much sense, I’m trying to think of some pseudomaths that would. Maybe the heat of incineration is a vector?

Hillexed2 (talkcontribs)

Do we really need an implication that they're different, though? Absolute hot being incineration could be fun?

I don't have any strong feelings on this, just mild "this seems a bit awkward" feelings on an honestly small detail. If you want to put it up there i'm fine with it

Geometea (talkcontribs)

While you know I always like the angsty option, I feel like that asks faaaar too many questions than it answers. One thing I was considering doing another time was creating a section of unsubstantiated things Kelvin has declared to be true and tbh whatever ze says about incineration would fall into that category so it isn’t really intended to be read as fact. I can edit it to make that clearer?

Hillexed2 (talkcontribs)

That could work! A quotes or claims section sounds like a great way to add some character, too

Geometea (talkcontribs)

Couple of edits - added a claims section, let me know what you think.

Kelvin Drumsolo Proposed Edits

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Geometea (talkcontribs)


Background

Kelvin Drumsolo is a founding member of the Core Mechanics, and was with the team during both Ascension and Descension. Drumsolo has never confirmed whether zir name, 'Kelvin', came as a result of the odd temperature effects surrounding zir. Nevertheless, Drumsolo is notable for being literally on fire at all times. It was believed that this protected zir from Incineration while playing Blaseball, however due to a total blood transfer with zir ex-spouse this is no longer the case.

Personal Life

Drumsolo has alluded to the fact that ze has been married and divorced several times, allegedly to the same person, believed to be fellow blaseball player Kelvin Andante. Drumsolo and Andante also make up avant-garde noise/classical/electronicore-Core band, Kelvin and the Kelvins. Drumsolo was born without legs and built zir own mobility device, a wheelchair seat supported by a multitude of mechanical legs and limbs. Drumsolo uses these, and the four separate drumkits affixed to zir chair, to drum at all times.

Absolute Hot

It has been alleged that Drumsolo could reach Absolute Hot (theorized by some to be 1.416785(71)×10^32 degrees Kelvin) if ze gave an impressive enough performance. Pursuit of this goal has reportedly caused issues with zir social life and blaseball career, though Drumsolo responds to all questions on this by skittering away at high speeds playing the drums. This goal has also generated some controversy among physicists within the Core - some maintaining that potentially destroying everything by taking reality to its melting point is an unthinkable risk, while others feel that knowing the true maximum temperature would answer a lot of "very big questions" and be "pretty cool, or, I guess hot, haha" and that tthose opposed are "just a bunch of unscientific cowards."

Kelvin Drumsolo Lore Proposal

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Geometea (talkcontribs)

Kelvin Drumsolo was born in the Core an indeterminate amount of time ago. Ze was a member of the Core Mechanics when they were founded and, despite being traded once or twice, was playing for the Core in time for their eventual ascension. As such, Drumsolo was still a member when they returned to Internet League Blaseball.

Drumsolo has never confirmed whether zir name, 'Kelvin', came as a result of the odd temperature effects surrounding zir. Nevertheless, Kelvin is notable for being literally on fire at all times. It was believed that this protected zir from Incineration while playing Blaseball, however due to a total blood transfer with zir ex-spouse this is no longer the case.

While it is common knowledge that Drumsolo is in a difficult-to-define relationship with another inhabitant of the Core, little is known as to the identity of this individual. It is believed that they are zir bandmate in popular Core musical group 'Kelvin and the Kelvins', presumably named for Drumsolo.

Drumsolo was born without legs and built zir own mobility device, a wheelchair seat supported by a plethora of mechanical legs and limbs. These are what create the titular drumming music that surrounds Drumsolo at all times, and about four different drumkits are affixed onto zir mobility device.

It has been alleged that Drumsolo could reach Absolute Hot (theorized by some to be 1.416785(71)×10^32 degrees Kelvin) if ze gave an impressive enough drumsolo, this has led to significant focus on zir music. While this has caused zir blaseball career to struggle at times as well as zir social life, Drumsolo allegedly responds to all questions on this by exiting at high speeds playing the drums. This goal has also generated some controversy among rival groups of Physicists within the Core - some maintaining that potentially destroying everything by taking reality to its melting point is an unthinkable risk, while others feel that knowing the true maximum temperature would answer a lot of 'very big questions' and that the naysayers are 'just a bunch of unscientific cowards'.

Beelijah (talkcontribs)

academic voice rewerite:

Background

Kelvin Drumsolo is a founding member of the Core Mechanics, and was with the team during both ascension and descension. Drumsolo has never confirmed whether zir name, 'Kelvin', came as a result of the odd temperature effects surrounding zir. Nevertheless, Drumsolo is notable for being literally on fire at all times. It was believed that this protected zir from Incineration while playing Blaseball, however due to a total blood transfer with zir ex-spouse this is no longer the case.

Personal Life

Drumsolo has alluded to the fact that ze has been married and divorced several times over to the same person, though the identity of their (sometimes) spouse is unknown. Drumsolo is the member of an avant-garde noise/classical/electronicore-Core band called Kelvin and the Kelvins. Drumsolo has refused to explain who 'the Kelvins' refers to. Drumsolo was born without legs and built zir own mobility device, a wheelchair seat supported by a multitude of mechanical legs and limbs. Drumsolo uses these, and the four separate drumkits affixed to zir chair, to drum at all times.

Absolute Hot

It has been alleged that Drumsolo could reach Absolute Hot (theorized by some to be 1.416785(71)×10^32 degrees Kelvin) if ze gave an impressive enough. Pursuit of this goal has reportedly caused issues with zir social life anf blaseball career, though Drumsolo responds to all questions on this by skittering away at high speeds playing the drums. This goal has also generated some controversy among physicists within the Core - some maintaining that potentially destroying everything by taking reality to its melting point is an unthinkable risk, while others feel that knowing the true maximum temperature would answer a lot of "very big questions" and be "pretty cool, or, I guess hot, haha" and that tthose opposed are "just a bunch of unscientific cowards."

Geometea (talkcontribs)

Just wanted to mention a couple of typos - should probably be 'married and divorced several times over, allegedly with the same person' (or smthn but because generally one says married to and divorced from'. You've used ze/zir throughout but wrote 'their (sometimes) spouse'. Under Absolute Hot, you've written 'if ze gave an impressive enough' so should probably add performance on there. Next sentence you've got an 'anf' instead of and. Other than that it looks good to me! Much more academic sounding!

Beelijah (talkcontribs)

Thanks for the heads up! proofreading is my weakest point as a writer, so I really appreciate this

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