Pitching Machine/IF-43.49

Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Pitching Machine at their Rumor Registry.

Pitching Machine #4349

From Los Angeli Universe: 4349

Appearance: PM is a standard-issue counterbalance forklift with custom Garages-branding coloring. The counterbalance weight in the rear of the forklift can occasionally be heard to slosh when PM builds up speed or brakes sharply, though no known liquid possess a high enough density to act as a safe counterweight. The counterweight unit has no clear cap or hole where liquids may even be added, though it has been observed to rattle ominously when PM siphons blood.

For fielding purposes, PM is equipped with a glove, with a sign pointing to the glove that says "glove⤴️". The sign is affixed per HCFSSB regulation 21 C.F.R. 1910 §178(a)(5), which states that attachments other than factory-installed ones are appropriately marked.

Details: PM pitches by doing donuts around the pitchers' mound, and releasing at an opportune moment. Additionally, as this PM does not have two left hands, according to HCFSSB guidelines it cannot safely disembark from a forklift.

Musical Ability: PM plays a custom-built extra-large keyboard, and plays exclusively in diads by lowering its fork-prongs onto the keys.