Parker Meng/Parker Meng Prime

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The Two Parkers

"Parker Meng Prime" is the term used to refer to the woman who played with the San Francisco Lovers for the first four seasons of blaseball. At the end of season 4, she was swapped with her double in an alternate universe, the Tough Love Dimension. For more information on Tough Lover Parker - also called Alt Parker, Suave Parker, and Mirror Parker - see Parker Meng.


Generally confident and an excellent all-around athlete, Parker's great weakness is that she has falls apart in conversation with women she considers cute and has no ability to flirt.

Parker was a last-minute addition to the original roster, joining at the behest of her best friend, Helga Moreno. Parker played blaseball in college and was a natural addition to the team but she only agreed to play so she could get closer to her crush, Helga Burton. At the end of season 3, Parker still hadn't confessed her feelings (although she had started dating several other members of the Lovers, including Kichiro Guerra and Knight Triumphant - mostly by accident).

During the extended Siesta prior to season 4, Parker shared her feelings with Helga Burton over social media, and the two started dating. Shortly after, she realized that Helgas Moreno and Burton were actually two people who share one body; although initially alarmed, she talked it out with Helga and they continued dating.

Parker Prime's fate is currently unknown, although Tough Lover Parker has stated she believes Parker Prime is being taken care of by the Tough Lovers and probably dating Helga.


Parker Prime's signature pitch, The Parker, is so-called because it "parks runners at home plate." It has been reported[1] that the pitch can knock down walls, despite being clocked at an average of only 86 miles per hour. Phlysicists have not yet determined how that is possible.

Parker's pitching benefited from an attempt to get demonic help with her flirting problem. She attempted to make a deal with demons to become more suave, but due to a miscommunication the demon made her a better pitcher and improved the Lovers' overall performance instead.

Charitable Work

Parker is a transgender woman and works extensively with Bay Area schools and youth groups that serve transgender youth. She's also a highly visible advocate for trans inclusion in youth sports. She coaches one of the many LGBT+ youth teams based out of The PolyHedron, the Poly Youth Good Friends.