Miami Dale/History

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The Miami Dale are one of the oldest teams in the ILB and boast a storied history as old as the League itself. While most reports suggest that the Dale only have between three and fourteen fans at any given time, the richness of their historical record speaks to those fans' dedication and enthusiasm.




The Discipline Era


Rivalry with The Garages

There does not seem to be a specific event marking the beginning of the Dale’s one-sided rivalry with the Seattle Garages. Recollections of the rivalry include:

  • “Everyone else had a Rival. We thought maybe it would be cool and fun. It wasn’t” (Anonymous Fan on the development of the rivalry in Season 1)
  • “Personally I believe music should be played in one of two places: the club, or outside. Garages are just so, like, grungy. Maybe if they were the Seattle Reclaimed Peak 90s Aesthetic Taco Bells I’d like them more.” (Pastel Swoosh, Dale fan and music journalist, on the ongoing rivalry, Season 2)

A likely source of competition is that the Garages were also in the Chaotic Evil division in the early seasons of the ILB, and thus the Dale played them regularly. The Dale won just 7 games against the Garages in Season 1, while the Garages took the other 11, including a series sweep. In Season 2, the Garages won 9 of 15 games, again including a series sweep. The two teams played only 9 games in Season 3, of which the Dale won 5 and the teams swept one series each.

Peanutification of Bong

Due to the passing of the Peanuts decree in the Season 2 election and the resulting Peanut Plague, the Dale pitcher known in Seasons 1 and 2 as Dan Bong became Peanut Bong. This effect was also observed in Dan (now Peanut) Holloway of the Philly Pies and Daniel (now Peanutiel) Duffy of the Hades Tigers.

End of Rivalry with The Garages

This more evenly-matched season may have brought the rivalry into more of a detente for Season 4, when, during the first Dale/Garages series of the season, beloved Dale batter Farrell Seagull swapped teams with Avila Guzman due to feedback. The ensuing inter-team discussion brought to light the teams’ mutual sense of loss for their former players, but also how much the teams and fanbases had in common and the possibilities raised by the roster shakeup. Guzman instantly became the new star of the Dale’s coffee scene and Miami nightlife, and Seagull embraced exciting new artistic directions in music, performance art, and destructive mural painting with her new teammates. It was then decided that the rivalry, if it had ever actually existed, was over.

Team Name Correction

Up until Season 6, the Dale were known as the Miami Dalé, but the accent was removed before Season 7 due to concerns about the misrepresentation of Spanish words and the inaccuracy of the implied pronunciation. Officially, the accent was placed there to "suggest something wrong about the world of blaseball." Indeed, while Blaseball.com showed the team name as the Dalé up until the change, the official Discord channel for the team showed it as Dalé, Dałe, Dále, and Dálé at various times. These unpredictable and seemingly unprovoked changes led to members of the fanbase referring to the shifting mark as “the chaos accent,” a name which stuck even after the mark was removed from the team’s name.

  • MiamiBlaseball [@MiamiBlaseball] (2 Oct 2020). "It was spelled that way on the website and the official dev correspondence I have received said it was there to 'suggest something wrong about the world of blaseball' " (Tweet) - via Twitter.

Life of the Party

The Dale, experienced in both Blaseball and civilian versions of Party Time, were vocal supporters of the Enhanced Party Time decree throughout Season 6. Unlike the decree, which had broad approval among ILB fans and endorsements from several high-profile Wild Low mascots, the bestowal of the Life of the Party modification was not just unexpected, but completely unexplained. The rarity of an event falling outside both the electoral structure and the sinister cosmology of the ILB sent players, team staff, and fans into a flurry of theorizing. No explanation was ever offered nor similar modifications given to other teams, lending credence to the now-widespread view that “they just thought we [the Dale] were cool and wanted to do something nice,” originally attributed to Kendall Moof, chairperson of the Miami Dale Event Coordination Committee’s Subcommittee on Vibes.

When Mr. Wide was asked about a potential conflict of interest or even favoritism due to the team’s spotless Party Time reputation, he said only “We have no control over what the Blaseball Gods do, any more than anyone else. Any team would be ill-advised to spurn their benediction, given that soon, we will weather their disfavor.” A shadow cast by a TV camera prevented anyone from seeing the Dale manager’s face for the entirety of the conference, but reporters present all described the chill that then fell across the room.

Daleween

The approximately 40-day period from late September through the end of October of the XX20 season was easily the most memorable in the team’s history thanks to a confluence of on-the-field, managerial, and fan events. Blaseball historians are split on the specifics of certain major events, particularly the Fandom Revival and, to a lesser extent, the Reflected Incinerations. Personal accounts from this time period have been uncovered, but these are not only unverifiable, they are often refuted by none other than the authors themselves. Despite such divergences in memory, evidence, and relevance to Halloween, this period is nonetheless ubiquitously referred to as Daleween.

First Reflected Incineration

Season 8 heralded the first time any fireproof player reflected an incineration attempt by an umpire. Umpire Husky's attempt to incinerate Beck Whitney backfired spectacularly thanks to Raúl Leal receiving The Iffey Jr. and fireproofing the entire team at the conclusion of Season 7. Since then the team and its fanbase have leaned into flexing their un-killable party spirit by seeking out further incinerations via blessings.

Miami Gerald reported about the first incident in the following article.

An Umpire Pays the Ultimate Price for Going Rogue

To the gruesome delight of many of its fans, Blaseball was turned on its head during Season 8's game day 94. It was Game 1 of the Baltimore Crabs and Miami Dale's series, and like many of blaseball's most hotly anticipated game days it occurred during eclipse weather, however, the danger of incineration to players on the field was turned instead onto the rogue umpires themselves.

The unthinkable occurred thanks to an oddity of an item gifted to Raul Leal of the Dale. At the beginning of season 8 Raul had been inexplicably using a sawed off bat with the inscription "Iffey Jr" at all his at bats. When asked about the peculiar bat and its clear disadvantages to any hitter, he said with a wink, "I promise this bat will change the destiny of the team for the better when you really see it in action".

Fans finally got an eye full of that action on day 94, and blaseball nation has had an earful of rumours abound from fans who witnessed the death of rogue umpire Husky, whose incinerating blast was deflected in the outfield by the Iffey Jr.

A familiar flash of light and heat smoke blew back from the umpire into the stands but some fans say they could still see it all unfold.

One such witness offered, "Yeah, the Ump was staring down Beck [Whitney], but the blast he let loose swung right into the Iffey like a magnet instead of hitting Beck! The bat started to glow then he just chucked it like a glowing boomerang right into the umpire's head. Whitney turned into a whole cloud of bats and rematerialized next to Husky before really letting 'em have it. When she was done she raised up the umpire's mask triumphantly. It was like she was glowing with new power".

When Beck was asked to comment she said, "I'm no stranger to what happens when the umpires go rogue, so I was anxious to have a plan when Raul told the team that the Iffey would give us a way to strike back but no one knew what would happen, really. When the incineration occurred, I remember feeling a white hot sensation at my back, and then an inexplicable powerful rage boiling up inside me. I turned around and saw the Umpire's eyes smoldering and knew the Iffey had worked. Raul was there holding this energy in front of me, and suddenly I had a bat in my hand! I can't explain exactly how, but this wasn't my usual bat. This one was a gift from Cali that just.. changed in that moment. It took on a life of its own and hasn't been the same since. I took the opportunity to get revenge with it by hitting that ball of energy right into the umpire. It was all such a rush. I haven't felt this strong since my days with The Flowers."

Shortly after the game Beck also tweeted out a warning to the gods themselves, “Commissioner, gods, if you're reading this...i'm gay and stronger than all of you, so don't try anything else funny”

Other accounts claimed the Iffey worked more like a powerful wand. Some said the Iffey turned into a flaming sword that Raul used to cut down Husky, turning the umpire into little more than a smoldering pile of limbs.

Whatever the particulars may be, one thing is sure. The fanbase has experienced a catharsis that has only left them wanting more. -Miami Gerald, Editor-in-Chief

Fandom Revival and Rebranding Efforts

The Dale marketing department was apparently not seeing their desired numbers despite the media sensation surrounding Leal and Whitney. Just two days after the incineration, the official Dale Twitter account announced that it would be inactive for the duration of the upcoming Siesta and (in a tone some readers considered passive-aggressive) asked for help from the Blaseball Gods in reviving a “dying” Dale fandom. What followed is widely believed to be some kind of direct intervention by said Gods, without any kind of warning or explanation to the Dale organization or its existing staff and fans; however, documentation is limited to Tweets, hearsay, and a single edited video. This sparse and questionably-reliable evidence suggests the following series of events:

  • An outside force (the Blaseball Gods?) hears the plea of the Dale Twitter account. While the account’s usual stewards are asleep, this force accesses the account and uses it to tweet cryptic messages. Tweet from @MiamiBlaseball
  • Dale captain Qais Dogwalker makes a public statement that this activity is not coming from within the organization, nor did the team receive any kind of briefing about the stunt. Additionally, team manager Mr. Wide may be missing. Tweet from @MiamiBlaseball, Tweet from @QaisPilot0079
  • An apparently unrelated scheduled tweet is posted (see Pronunciation Campaign)
  • The regular manager of the Dale twitter account wakes up from the siesta and tweets about an ongoing situation at Worldwide Field and surrounding areas, including the assertion that the "dead fanbase" had been "revived". Tweet from @MiamiBlaseball, Tweet from @MiamiBlaseball
  • Video footage of Worldwide Field under siege from what appear to be very wet zombies is shared as part of a trailer for a film called “The Dale Don’t Die.” Four members of the Dale community, including Worldwide Field security guard Tamami Arai, appear in the trailer as well, and are later identified as part of a group called “the Defenders.” No other evidence of the existence of such a film can be found. Tweet from @MiamiBlaseball
  • The Dale account reports that they “are still being attacked by friggin’ zombies,” and identifies said zombies as “hordes of [the Dale’s] undead fanbase, further implying that the Blaseball Gods’ response to their request in September was in fact an overly literal one. Tweet by @MiamiBlaseball
  • A full week passes without a major event reported on Twitter.
  • The Dale account tweets a press release about its intention to use more press releases, beginning a multi-faceted initiative to broaden the Dale’s social media presence. Tweet by @MiamiBlaseball
  • The Dale create a Pinterest account and tweet a press release about it. Tweet by @MiamiBlaseball, Tweet by @MiamiBlaseball
  • The Dale account tweets that the team has “reached an agreement with the Gods for them to retcon the zombie stuff at midnight on October 31st so that we can get new branding.” Tweet by @MiamiBlaseball
  • The Dale reveal a new minimalist logo and brand style on November 1st. Tweet by @MiamiBlaseball
  • No one interviewed beyond November 1st remembers anything related to the alleged “zombie stuff.”

The Flamingos Cheerleading Squad

Though (allegedly) a chaotic period for the Dale social media and security teams, it was business as usual for the team’s management and promotions department. An agreement was finally reached between the Dale and the Immaterial Plane Cheerleaders’ Union ensuring that the Dale cheerleading squad would be majority composed of species native to the Miami area. The lack of an official cheer squad had not been noticed until late in Season 8 due to the general enthusiasm and dance skill of fans at Worldwide Field, but the team and fans alike agreed that if there was to be an official squad on the field itself, it should not be a vector for invasive species.

Many members of The Press took offense to this rule, resulting in the Journalist Strike of Season 8 Game 75. Further negotiation benefitted both sides, however, as Management installed a lounging pond in the Press Box and the Press realized none of them wanted to be cheerleaders anyway.

The new cheerleading squad, dubbed The Flamingos, debuted during Season 9, Game 96 in which the Dale defeated the Hellmouth Sunbeams.


Pronunciation Campaign

Dale press release created by Sav.

While the removal of what is sometimes known as the "chaos accent" was broadly popular among both Dale fans and the blaseball community in general, one unforeseen consequence seems to be increased confusion over the pronunciation of the team's name. A controversy involving popular blaseball news account Blaseball News Network brought this misconception to a head with the release of their historical summary video "Blaseball: The First Eight Seasons," in which the Dale's name was pronounced incorrectly. In response to this and the seemingly widespread lack of clarity regarding the name, the Dale published a press release on Twitter and Discord the next morning that explained the correct pronunciation, history, and meaning of "dale."

  • BLASEBALL NEWS NETWORK [@BlaseballNews] (1 Oct 2020). (Tweet) - via Twitter.
  • MiamiBlaseball [@MiamiBlaseball] (2 Oct 2020). (Tweet) - via Twitter.

Production also started on a public service announcement that could reach a broader audience than a press release. Kept tightly under wraps until release, the result was the song ¡Dale! (That's How You Say It) ft. La Familia [official pronunciation guide]. The song was released as Track 26 on the album Away Games, published by Fourth Strike Records on October 9, XX20.

Triple Kill and the Second Reflected Incineration

At the conclusion of the Season 9 election the team received one of three possible incineration blessings. This time Don Elliott was targeted and similarly incinerated the offending umpire. The events were recapped in a column for the Miami Gerald newspaper:

Elliott Insists on Stepping Up as Triple Kill Target

Raul Leal and his Iffey Jr. dominated the spotlight both on and off the field in Season 9. In response to three available blessings that would, among other effects, incinerate a player, a plan emerged to sway those contests in the Dale’s favor and, thanks to the Iffey, prevent three unnecessary deaths. Dale management took a full 28 games to scrutinize the blessings, their Fireproof modification, and the Iffey itself with the help of experts from SIBR, but eventually endorsed the plan. The campaign for the Triple Kill began as posters and chants of “Dale Don’t Die!” were used to solicit and coordinate efforts between ILB teams.

Dale player Don Elliott, who has been with the team since Season 1, Day 1, volunteered to be the expected target of the New Kid blessing’s incineration attempt. At an inter-after-party press conference, Elliott gave the following prepared remarks:

As you all know, I have lived forty-six lifetimes before this one and I will live uncountably many more in the pursuit of Elliottlightenment. For this reason, I have never feared the end of one lifetime. The loss of a friend is a far more fearsome prospect.

I have asked to be the least-idolized Dale player on this coming election day, and Mr. Wide has agreed. I have spoken with my teammates but I also wanted to speak with all of you, the fans and supporters who have made this job bearable for almost nine seasons. We all know the Gods will seek any loophole in our resources to cause us more pain, and I am the best equipped to manage that possibility. If our research is wrong, or if they play dirty, it will not be any failing on the part of the voters, on the part of my team, and especially not on the part of my dear friend—my brother—Raúl. If that happens, that’s between the Gods and the Forty-Eighth Incarnation of Don Elliott.

Each Don has their own collection of memories, a patchwork stretching back to the Man himself. This team will be an eternal, enduring thread of that cloth.

Now, I’d like to remind everyone to check their smoke detector batteries and tire inflation pressure. In the immortal words of DE33, ‘There’s never a bad time for some preventive maintenance!’ I have some coupons for Deb’s Battery Warehouse and Warehouse Bat Sanctuary if anyone wants one. Okay. I’ll see you all at the after-after-party. Drive safe.

The Dale received a plurality of votes for all three of the Triple Kill blessings, a first in the team’s history (their previous record vote percentage was 3). However, due to the random nature of blessing assignment, they received only one, New Kid, with an overwhelming 63% of the vote. Leal was successful in redirecting the resulting incineration, resulting in the death of Ump Raúl and the continued safety of Don Elliott. The announcement that Umpire Raul had been incinerated only seemed to add more warmth to the fire that is the Dale's eternal party culture. -Alison “Allie Gator” Marquez, Staff Reporter

Dogwalker's Record Seasons

Veteran Dale pitcher Qais Dogwalker made appearances in league-wide news outlets during Season 9 due to their perfect 10 wins in 10 appearances at mid-season. They struggled slightly more in the later half of the season but finished with a respectable 16/20 win record.

Dogwalker benefited greatly from Enhanced Party Time and Life of the Party after the Dale entered Party Time for Season 9. Their stats improved multiple times due to the quality of their partying and they became the Dale’s first-ever five star rated pitcher and only current five star player.

The Shelled One

The events of Day X had a major impact on the Dale, including playing a full season with only 13 players and having a permanently reduced pitching rotation. Personal perspectives have been collected and can be read at https://www.blaseball.wiki/w/Peanut_Bong#Relationship_with_The_Shelled_One. The following report appeared in The Miami Gerald just before the opening of Season 11:

Familia Lost and Found

The Dale’s Season 9 Playoff Watch Party was struck by tragedy when beloved pitcher Peanut Bong did not return from a 7-11 run. Their teammates learned what had happened by watching the game’s broadcast: the Shoe Thieves won the Championship with a last-minute Shame, and the Shelled One appeared and compelled its “PODS,” including Bong, to play against the new champions. Notably, Bong was a lineup player for the PODS, their first-ever professional appearance at that position.

After defeating them, the PODS and the Shelled One disappeared until after the Season 10 championship. Bong and the other PODS overwhelmingly defeated the newly-crowned Crabs and then faced off against the Hall Stars, who finally managed to defeat the PODS just before the Monitor arrived and ate the Shelled One.

Nothing was heard from the PODS until they fell back to various ILB teams after the Season 10 Election, at which point Bong joined the Infinite Tacos. Former Dale pitcher and PODS member Francisca Sasquatch fell to the Dale, where players and fans alike welcomed her back to the team. Bong was confirmed to be safe and happy in the Infinite Los Angeles, where they returned to the mound and their preferred position as a pitcher.-Alison “Allie Gator” Marquez, Staff Reporter

Daleween Party

Despite the historically hectic month, the Miami Dale Event Coordination Committee (MDECC) went through with their fall event, the leaguewide Daleween party on October 31st. The party was held in and on Biscayne Bay, with La Fiesta serving as the flagship and all manner of watercraft and swimmers clustering around it. The event included trick-or-treating, a multi-boat dance floor with DJ sets from Dale players, a costume contest, and a charity drive. The party went for a full 24 hours, winding down only well after midnight Miami time on November 1.

The Grand Siesta

Blattle of the Blands

Dale fans submitted two songs to the November 13 Blattle of the Blands hosted by the Seattle Garages. They were reviewed favorably in the Miami Gerald:

Miami Musicians Rock the Boat at Blattle of the Blands

Life of the Party (Death of the Gods), a bilingual dance-pop track blending melodious, sing-rapped verses with a punchy chorus, captures the explosive energy of a team that has just done the impossible. Danceable, sing-alongable, and a nod not just to recent history but a future full of possibility. I was not surprised at the crowd’s ecstatic reaction to the performance. B.L.U.R. may have brought the energy down momentarily, but the drum 'n' bass track’s entrancing electronic build soon had the crowd dancing again. Who doesn’t love a chantable jam with techno beats and a great, family-friendly message? Calling it now: an instant classic. -Pastel Swoosh, Music Correspondent

Friendship with the Lift

RFF sent to the Lift by the Dale.

On December 7, XX20 a quorum of Dale fans composed an official Request For Friendship to the Tokyo Lift fanbase. The RFF was delivered that evening and met with unanimous support, widely believed to be due to the RFF’s exceptionally well-supported arguments, internal logic, comparative analysis, and charm. Lift fans voted to bypass the usual procedure and approve the RFF on the spot. As Lift and Dale fans met, many for the first time, they discovered a shared love of repetitive chants and created the now-ubiquitous Dale/Lift mantra, “LIFT WEIGHT ON BOAT.”

BBBBBQ Small Fanbase Friendship Initiative

Reports of an ongoing effort by the three smallest ILB teams (the Dale, the Steaks, and the Wild Wings) to get to know each other better have been largely positive. Among the more surprising developments is an alleged close friendship between the usually-distant Dale manager Mr. Wide and Steaks coach Coach.