Lizzy Pasta

From Blaseball Wiki

Lizzy Pasta was a player in the Shadows for the Hawai'i Fridays, and was with the team from Season β13, Day 28 until Fall Ball. Pasta has previously played for the Core Mechanics.

Official League Records

Pasta joined the ILB as a pitcher for the Core Mechanics during the Descension.

On Season β13, Day 28, Pasta was exchanged to the Hawai'i Fridays due to Feedback. Pasta was replaced by Jaylen Hotdogfingers.

During the Season β13 elections Pasta retreated to the Fridays' Shadows in exchange for Fenry Marlow as a result of the Fridays' Foreshadow will, resulting in a combined 9.3 10.1 stat increase.

During the Season β22 elections, Pasta's star ratings were completely randomized as a result of the Shadow Alternate Trust blessing, resulting in Pasta becoming an Alternate, gaining the Negative modification, and a combined 10.5 10.9 stat increase.

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Testimony on Lizzy Pasta's Identity

Stories swirl about Lizzy Pasta in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. Wiki archivists have dutifully recorded some of them in a Rumor Registry, summarized for easy research. These are the notes for one story from IF-46.452...

Lizzy Pasta looks like any other average person, except for one notable feature: her pasta hair. Taking the shape of angel hair, bowtie, penne, and any other delicious noodle one can think of, she changes her style frequently by cooking up some new hair. No matter its shape, it’s always cooked to perfection. Pasta also has Ehlers-Danlos syndrome and as a result has taken to pitching with a ladle to prevent her fingers from dislocating due to her flexible joints. She likes to call her good joint days “al dente”. As a tinkerer and inventor, Pasta also makes her own custom braces, splints, and a motorized chair with a seemingly endless supply of assistive devices stashed inside for anyone who may need them. Similarly, her kitchen has been upgraded to better accommodate ambulatory chair users.

Player History

A hyper and snarky pal, Pasta is well known among her team as a giver of fantastic hugs and a teller of awful puns. Her last name isn’t actually Pasta, but simply a childhood nickname she adopted for league paperwork. She was the resident food mechanic of the Core and is an extremely talented chef, though she only makes pasta (“it’s easy, it’s hardy, and it’s full of love - what else could you want?”). She also switches off wearing a saucepan and a colander as a helmet while pitching.

Aside from cooking, Pasta has many different passions and talents. Before getting into splorts, she was an author. She originally joined the Mechanics as a way to study baseball for her next book and learn more about the setting. However, she found she quite enjoyed the team, the people, and society in the Core and decided to stay, taking the time to become a better word mechanic. Pasta was also a prominent programmer. While her own code was strangely formatted and often unreadable to her teammates, she always offered help to them and made an excellent idea jammer. She was also somewhat of a restaurateur, co-owning a restaurant/food truck with Ruffian Applesauce called Pasta Sauce. Critics dubbed their food “delicious, if a bit carb heavy”.

Time on the Fridays

Since her transfer to the Hawai’i Fridays’ shadows, Pasta has taken up running the Cookout’s third base drink and snack cart, now refitted to also serve as a food truck. The resident chef has added, of course, pasta to the menu. Pasta also has embraced the teams’ dress code and enjoys wearing neon blue and pink bucket hats. She was previously friends with Mrs. Silk and went to culinary school with Jeff Spacejam, a press affiliate of the Hawai’i Fridays’ Fan Club Zine, so she found it easy to slip into place on her new team.

Pasta’s passion for cooking has only grown since moving to Hawai’i. While she still only cooks pasta (“making drinks and snacks aren’t technically cooking”), she invented a new method she now solely uses: boiling pasta in seawater. She also experiments with many new “SEAsonings”, as she likes to call them, that weren’t available to her in the Core. She often prepares lunches and snacks for her teammates, and frequently travels back and forth between Hawai’i and the Core to drop off food to her old team and run various things back and forth. Even though she isn’t currently on the active roster, Pasta still loves the game of baseball and gets notably rowdy during Mechanics/Fridays games.

Fan Works