Lance Serotonin/IF-9.739

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Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Lance Serotonin at their Rumor Registry.


Lance Serotonin is a mixed Afro-Brazilian and Japanese handbike racer, wheelchair rugby player, gymnast, physiotherapist, motivational speaker and champion competitive high-fivist. They also dabble in Blaseball.

Serotonin is easily recognised by the candle stubs burning at the ends of their dreads. These seem to be entirely real candles, as evidenced by the thick trails of wax on the collar and shoulders of their Lift uniform, but are not seen to grow smaller over time.

While their charisma and positivity are instantly apparent, Serotonin's talent for high-fiving was only discovered after a strong third-place finish in the Arctic Circle All-Terrain Wheelchair Classic. Despite spending six palm-blistering days powering across the Canadian tundra Serotonin was still able to high-five each of the other finishers without instantly crying out in pain. A professional contract was offered within minutes.

In their first high-fiving tournament Serotonin claimed the elusive Triple Crown of High Fiving, along the way defeating former physiotherapy patient Stijn Strongbody. The two formed a short-lived but successful doubles pairing billed as "Forewarned and Four-Armed".

With the Tokyo Lift

Serotonin’s high-fiving career became largely recreational, but they continued to appear in charity exhibition matches. It was at one such event that Strongbody invited them to join the fledgling Tokyo Lift, framing it as "kind of a challenge, I don't know if you're up for it". Serotonin had accepted by the "ll" of "challenge".

Despite starting as a novice, recruited mostly for the purpose of boosting team morale, Serotonin made rapid progress and by the end of their rookie season ranked among the Lift's strongest batters. Strongbody appointed Serotonin the team’s vice-captain, noting that Serotonin had the interpersonal skills that he lacked. The two worked closely together and rubbed off on one another; Strongbody continued working with Serotonin for physiotherapy, and Serotonin began to learn about Strongbody’s research into potential futures.

A firm favorite with the home crowd, Serotonin devoted much time to meeting Lift fans before, after and often during the game. They were known for their CMYK sweatbands bearing inspirational words and phrases, replicas of which are still available from vending machines around the stadium. These have become a major street trend in cities worldwide.

Redaction, Alternation, and Time in Chicago

Following several strong, successful, and uplifting seasons with the Lift, Serotonin became Observed in Season 16. Not even positivity could save them, and they were Redacted shortly thereafter.

The next season, Serotonin emerged in the middle of a Chicago Firefighters game, and was Attracted to the team. Rumors have swirled that Serotonin’s perpetually-burning candle locs were extinguished when they emerged from the Secret Base. Video footage of the game is inconclusive. As soon as Serotonin touched home plate and became a Firefighter, the candles lit up again, much to the consternation of their new teammates.

Serotonin has been reticent about their Redaction, their Attraction, and their ensuing Alternation whilst in the Firefighters’ shadows. They have, however, been forthcoming about the importance of therapy and counseling as a part of their recovery, noting that meeting with their therapist made them feel refreshed and brand new. Inspired by their therapist, Serotonin began training as a therapist themself.

After Serotonin felt appropriately recovered from their ordeal, they began traveling with the Firefighters to all of their games. Serotonin would frequently tag along with their teammates to get to know them better. It was during one of these trips, alongside Chicago historian and librarian Clare Mccall, that Serotonin gained interest in historical research. Mccall provided some guidance, including suggesting that Serotonin figure out a research specialization.

Unbeknownst to the public and even Mccall, Serotonin had already made up their mind on a specialization. In a journal entry, Serotonin explained that during the time they were Redacted, Serotonin was taunted by half-memories of a 17th-century sailing galleon, and furthermore by memories of serving as first mate.

Serotonin had become increasingly determined to uncover the truth and, with guidance from their therapist, decided to formally investigate. They continued traveling with the Firefighters, but now began spending time in other cities’ archives, conducting research into the Tokyo Adrift.

Time in Atlantis

During one of Serotonin’s research trips to Atlantis, they made two major discoveries. The first was when they learned about The Atlantean Facility for Interdimensional Studies and Hypotheses (A.F.I.S.H.), which they believed could help them uncover more history about the Adrift. The second was that Jan Canberra, the new captain of the Georgias, had memories in common with their 17th-century counterpart, and were likely the same person.

Serotonin was invigorated by this study and put in several requests to transfer to the Georgias. It’s unclear whether their subsequent kidnapping by The Bubble’s Phantom Thieves' Guild was the league’s response or a happy accident. Serotonin seemed unbothered by being kidnapped, describing it as “pretty pleasant, all things considered.”

Serotonin was last seen continuing their research, relishing the use of A.F.I.S.H. resources, and unsuccessfully trying to draw memories out of Canberra. They have continued both their physiotherapy and psychotherapy practices in Atlantis, and have even mentioned a renewed interest in competitive high-fiving. When asked about the change of heart, Serotonin answered, “Sometimes you want something familiar, a little comforting. That’s what high-fiving is for me. Something that makes me feel good. It just took a while for me to remember that.”