Hotbox Sato

From Blaseball Wiki

Hotbox Sato was a lineup player for the Charleston Shoe Thieves, and was with the team from Season β4, Day 58 until being incinerated on Season β13, Day 20.

Official League Records

Sato joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Boston Flowers after the incineration of Bryanayah Chang on Season β3, Day 5.

On Season β4, Day 58, Sato was exchanged to the Charleston Shoe Thieves due to Feedback. Sato was replaced by Morrow Doyle.

During the Season β6 election, the Shoe Thieves received the Mutually Arising blessing, resulting in a combined 6.0 6.6 stat increase.

During the Season β8 election, the Shoe Thieves received the Radical Alchemy blessing, which randomized Sato's batting from 1.4 2.0

On Season 9, Day X, Sato gained the Flinch modification after the Shoe Thieves lost to THE SHELLED ONE'S PODS.

On Season β10, Day 41, Sato's defensive ability was siphoned by Hawaii Fridays lineup player Spears Taylor in a game with Blooddrain weather, decreasing it from 2.7 2.2 . On Day 75, Sato's defensive ability was again siphoned by Taylor, decreasing it from 2.2 1.6 .

In the Season β10 elections, Sato received Noise-Cancelling Headphones, becoming Soundproof. (The Headphones would later be lost, along with all other Discipline Era items across the league, at the beginning of Season 15.)

On Season β13, Day 20, Sato was incinerated and replaced with Alx Keming.

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Blaseball Career

Career with the Shoe Thieves

The Shoe Thieves were at first unaware they had received a player in exchange for Morrow Doyle, only realizing Hotbox Sato had been traded to their team after it triggered the smoke alarms in the Charleston clubhouse. After an evacuation and several attempts by the local fire department to find the source of the smoke, Velasquez Alstott discovered the word "Hello" and a rudimentary smiling face drawn in the soot on the clubhouse window. With the support from a coven of local witches, the Shoe Thieves were able to forge a psychic link with Sato, and with this new medium of communication soon welcomed Sato to the team.

Inducting Sato into the Charleston tradition of footwear larceny initially proved challenging as Sato found it tiring to wear shoes for an extended period of time, but pitcher Snyder Briggs suggested they burn some of the shoes left behind by Morrow Doyle, and Sato was able to successfully incorporate the resulting smoke into their own body, which manager Cornelius Games declared "Close enough for me."

While Sato was capable of maintaining a cohesive physical form, it preferred to relax by dispersing evenly throughout an entire room. To accommodate this, the Shoe Thieves removed all smoke detectors and fans from one of the lounges in the Charleston clubhouse, affectionately nicknaming it "the Shoebox".

Sato could often be found relaxing and watching old sitcoms in one of the Shoe Thieves' many piles of stolen shoes with Snyder Briggs, who it was reportedly particularly close to.

Additionally, Sato seemed to have found itself a niche as a tutor for its fellow Shoe Thieves. While Sato was already familiar with ASL, it quickly learned LSQ to better communicate with teammate Joe Voorhees. Afterwards, Sato took it upon itself to try and teach the young Velasquez Alstott. While it can be difficult to impress the importance of topics aside from Blaseball and Shoe Larceny, Sato was more than willing to work within the metaphor of planning a heist to teach problem solving, though the three seem to view the lessons as more of a bonding experience than anything else.

Personal Life

Sato appeared to be entirely made of smoke. No one is sure how it held a bat, or caught a ball, but its results were undeniable. It was also a very straight-edged individual and in fact believed its name derives from saunas; it was therefore unknown at the whether the smoke had psychoactive chemicals in it.

There were rumors that Sato may have been involved with former New York Millennials player Dominic Marijuana or teammate Snyder Briggs.

The Smokehouse Gang

Upon Tillman Henderson's transfer to the Thieves, Briggs and Sato incorporated the new player into their dynamic. Henderson was spotted regularly joining the two for Sitcom Night, which seemed to occur every evening. Shortly thereafter, Henderson began referring to the trio as "The Smokehouse Gang," evidently due to the fact that all three players are in some way affiliated with smoke. When questioned in an interview, Sato commented that "I really don’t think calling it 'The Smokehouse Gang' is a good idea." In an attempt to be respectful of Sato's wishes, the press dubbed the group the "I Really Don’t Think Calling It The Smokehouse Gang Is A Good Idea" gang, also known as the IRDTCITSGIAGI gang or The Smokehouse Gang for short. Most of the gang's activities revolved around television in some capacity.

By the end of the Grand Siesta, Sato had allegedly entered a romantic relationship with Briggs, and the Smokehouse Gang had expanded to include Sunbeams players Miguel James and Iggy Delacruz.

After Sato's incineration, Tillman Henderson was quoted as saying "Turns out the smoke could burn, who knew?" while rubbing his eyes.

Fan Works