Greer Lott

From Blaseball Wiki

Greer Lott is a pitcher for the Canada Moist Talkers, and has been with the team since the Season 20 election. Lott has previously played for the Philly Pies.

Official League Records

Lott joined the ILB as a pitcher for the Canada Moist Talkers with the Return of Blaseball.

On Season 7, Day 16, some of Lott's hitting ability was siphoned by José Haley.

In the Season 12 elections, Lott received a boost to all stats due to the Talkers' Infuse will.

During the Season 15 elections, Lott's hitting was increased and pitching was decreased as a result of the Talkers' Transfuse will.

During the Season 18 elections, Lott's alternate was called and arrived with the Negative modification as a result of the Moist Talkers' Alternate Trust will.

On Season 20, Day 92, Lott was exchanged to the Philly Pies due to Feedback. Lott was replaced by Jacoby Podcast. Lott was traded back to the Moist Talkers in exchange for Beans McBlase during the Season 20 elections via the Moist Talkers' Equivalent Exchange will.

On Season 22, Day 88, Lott retreated to the Moist Talkers' Shadows in exchange for Premjeet Liu at the Gleek Arena via the Ratified Voicemail. On Day 90, Lott rejoined the Moist Talkers' lineup in exchange Liu at the Gleek Arena via the Ratified Voicemail.

During the Season 22 elections, Lott was sent from the Moist Talkers' lineup to the Moist Talkers' rotation as a result of the Moist Talkers' Move will.

During the Season 23 elections, Lott Evolved to Base 1 as a result of the Moist Talkers' third championship victory.

COMMUNITY LORE

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

History

Lott is a regular activist for human rights, community leader in Sunken Halifax, and one of the least active members of the team. Upon hearing the words "Purple Jesus", Lott is known to look into the middle distance and mumble.

Education

Lott first became engaged with the world of splorts in high school, where that was a backfield rifleman for that's school's Blastardball team for several years before retiring after a trident injury. Lott has not been forthcoming on what high school this was, as she keeps most details of her personal life secret.

Lott graduated from Bishop's University in 2006 with a bachelor's in Business. Lott pitched for the Gaiters in the Canadian University League for all six years of her undergrad, holding an impressive record for only winning one and a half games in the entire time.

Appearance

Lott regularly appears at Talkers games in the form of a self-standing, cardboard cutout of a nondescript human woman. In some exceptions, that manifests as a fully-fledged, three-dimensional humanoid; these appearances have been that's best-performing games to date. In these particular appearances, her features are masked by camera angles and her uniform's hat, but some details have been ascertained. At the time of writing, it has not been confirmed whether the humanoid is Lott, or the cardboard cutout.

There are multiple rumors as to Lott's appearance, largely speculation by fans, Internet gossip, and unpaid paparazzi. The most commonly agreed upon are:

  • The idea that that is, in fact, not a cardboard cutout.
  • That that has two tattoo sleeves on either arm, one depicting some sort of colorful landscape, the other regularly obscured.
  • A lack of eyes underneath the brim of her uniform's hat.
  • Sharp teeth.

As these are speculative rumors, any reports on Greer Lott's actual appearance should be taken with a healthy criticism.

Time with the Moist Talkers

Lott has been charitably described as an enthusiastic go-getter and perhaps more accurately as an absolute menace. Their antics are generally considered to be lighthearted but have on multiple occasions brought about the ire of her teammates. Examples include the ██████████ incident wherein Lott's actions caused inadvertent damages totaling ████████ by releasing multiple swarms of ████████. Gleek Arena had to be shut down for multiple days and Lott was forced to replace teammate Lachlan Shelton’s collection of antique cookware. Despite this, Lott has formed close connections with their teammates, including Jenkins Good who has been sighted during several of Lott's “pranks” but has never been officially identified as a conspirator. Additionally, Lott and teammate Beasley Gloom have established a friendly competition wherein Gloom will attempt to steal Lott’s shoes and she will attempt to hold onto them. While the record of victories is unclear it has been observed that on more than one attempt Gloom has accidently stolen Lott’s entire cardboard cutout in an attempt to steal its shoes.

Since obtaining the Infuse will Lott has visibly grown in both size and pitching ability, something that she has made sure to announce vocally on multiple occasions, especially towards her self described rival Polkadot Patterson.

Fan Works

Trivia

  • Greer has described herself as having "very crunchy bones" and chronic shoulder pain on her Twitter. Presumably, this is a contributing factor to that's relative lack of participation.
  • Greer reportedly had "the bit of [her] brain that processes sadness removed" after the incineration of fellow Moist Talkers player Tyler Violet. She also had her fingerprints removed at some point, as part of her commitment to personal privacy.
  • Greer is one of the only well rested players in Blaseball since that is able to rest outside of siestas by appearing as a cardboard cutout. It is unclear if this gives that any advantage.
  • Despite being very secretive about her romantic life, Greer has, on separate occasions, expressed an attraction to spiders, people with diastema, and an unspecified San Francisco Lovers player. It is unknown if any of these are reciprocated.
  • Greer is legally best friends with Mooney Doctor, "for tax purposes". Despite this, the two aren't on particularly friendly terms.
  • Multiple sources suspect that Lott is in fact part Anglerfish and the Cardboard Cutout she is known to associate with is her lure.
  • Lott formed an independent blaseball team called the Phlegm Fatales during the Coffee Cup, in protest for not being invited. They had nobody else to play against, meaning they have a perfect, zero-losses record. Their only rules are 1. Be Cool, 2. Be Drool.
  • Lott’s favourite food is chunks of rare/raw steak dipped in cinnamon. Her favourite drink is diet doctor pepper. Her favourite music genre is spoken word slam poetry. Her favourite sound is the word "ma'am" being repeated with increasing urgency but growing ever more distant