Official League Records
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.
Box of Gerund Pantheocide Files
- Dust billows as the file box lands on the table. While many archives in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill are unified in some way, this... definitely isn’t one of them. The accompanying Rumor Registry explains all of the contents... wherever it is... but for now you grab the folder labelled IF-1667 and start reading...
The following accounts can be traced to a single leather-bound journal originally found in a locked wooden chest alongside a sextant-like device of indeterminate origin and a shell that matches no known species of mollusc. The chest was located in a storage room in the Legscraper’s lower levels that was described as “smelling faintly of the sea”. Subsequent attempts to locate and navigate to said room have been unsuccessful thus far. The journal details the exploits of the crew of a large sailing vessel, The Tokyo Adrift, descriptions of which are largely consistent with mid-17th century galleons.
With The Tokyo Adrift
Gerund Pantheocide serves as the gunner of The Tokyo Adrift after promoting herself from the position of powder monkey. Pantheocide is described as “being proficient in firearms, polearms, her own arms and most arms in between”. One entry depicts Pantheocide as running into battle with “no less than two blades in each hand, with an additional hunting knife held between clenched teeth”. With regards to her abilities as the ship’s gunner, one crewmate was quoted as saying “I once saw her shoot a cannonball out of the air mid-flight with her own”. The captain himself described Pantheocide’s gunnery as “mightily impressive” and “in defiance of the laws of conservation of momentum”.
Despite signing up for a life on the seas, Pantheocide repeatedly expressed a disdain for the ocean, describing it as “Poseidon’s bathtub” and expressing a desire to “dive down there and give the ol’ son of a gun a piece of [her] mind”. In at least one instance, she was found firing a cannon angled almost straight down before claiming that the shot was a misfire.
Pantheocide’s physical prowess presumably came into play during the events of 1667, with the final journal entry describing her charging headfirst towards an [REDACTED] threatening the ship and its crew. The bottom half of the last page of the journal is sliced to shreds, rendering it unreadable.
For more fanfiction, go to the Gerund Pantheocide tag on AO3.
- phone home by waltztangocache - Gerund Pantheocide calls Yusef Fenestrate after being brought back to life.
- for agony i'd rather know by novelsinourheads - Gerund Pantheocide joins the Firefighters after their resurrection.
Art by @tredlocity, template by Stonius Liftalonicus VI#7675.
Art by @unhenge
Pantheocide departing. Art by @saltbuzzard
Gerund by Tigrishades
Art by @pysics
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