Dervin Gorczyca

From Blaseball Wiki

Dervin Gorczyca is a lineup player for the Breckenridge Jazz Hands, and has been with the team since Season 13, Day 98.

Official League Records

Gorczyca joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Breckenridge Jazz Hands on Season 13, Day 98 after the incineration of Combs Estes.


COMMUNITY LORE

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Note from Historian Inumo

The primary text of this page documents the most commonly observed version of this player on the Blaseball field. For other versions, see the Interdimensional Rumor Mill below. If you have information regarding this player, see the team's contribution guidelines for information about how to add it to this page.

Personal Life

Dervin Gorczyca is a Polish brown bear who lives in Breckenridge with bears family members, many of whom frequent the stands of The Pocket. Outside of Blaseball, bear enjoys snowboarding and visiting the restaurants around Breckenridge. Gorczyca also plays the hurdy gurdy; bears playing can be heard in the theme song of bears’ show The Dervin Derby. Bear wears a 90s era ski suit with no pants, and when asked why Gorczyca replied “At first I thought it would appeal to the youth of today, but I’ve really grown to like it.” When asked about Gorczyca's gender fans responded “They are a bear.”

Professional Life

Before joining the Jazz Hands Gorczyca hosted the show The Dervin Derby where bear showered equal praise upon Michelin star restaurants and the restaurants’ garbage bins. When asked about bears favorite restaurant Gorczyca said “Kieliszki na Próżnej is a classic, they even separate their containers from their food so you don’t have to waste time going through containers and you can get straight to your meal”

Bear also later guest hosted Dumpsters, Drive-ins, and Dives ending the show’s tour of the US in Breckenridge where Gorczyca announced bear would be retiring and living in Breckenridge from now on.

Introduction to Blaseball

In retirement Gorczyca's family introduced bear to Blaseball and bears home team the Jazz Hands. When Combs was incinerated, bear stepped up to the plate to replace them. Gorczyca is slower than you would expect a bear to be due to bears mostly sedentary lifestyle, however Gorczyca is still intimidating on base.

Adventures Elsewhere

During the first 2 week siesta of the Expansion era Dervin Gorzyca and Baby Doyle were sent elsewhere and did not return until play resumed in Season 16. During this time rumors report that Gorczyca and Doyle were hard at work in the kitchen creating “Doylent” Baby Doyle's new line of baby food that apparently has athletic enhancing abilities, the list of ingredients contains “Doyle Sludge, Spicy Milk, Ridge Street Kitchen garbage, Percolated Energy and a scrap of the Sheet Music of the Universe.” This seems to not have any measurable effect on performance, though Baby Doyle giggles and claps every time some is brought out so the Pockets fridge is kept well stocked. When Baby Triumphant was interviewed they responded with a confused look, and a stare off with the reporter that lasted 30 minutes. When Sylvia Rugrat was interviewed she said “I support Baby Doyle’s business venture whole heartedly but I will not eat that if it has spicy milk in it.” Doylent was a commercial failure since Babies Triumphant and Doyle are an outlier in terms of athletic ability. Though Gorczyca says it is Baby Doyle’s greatest accomplishment yet, Dervin being new to the Jazz Hands was apparently not aware of Doyle’s time traveling abilities or high batting power.

Interdimensional Rumor Mill

No other versions of Dervin Gorczyca have been observed. If you have information regarding a different version of Dervin Gorczyca, please add it here.