Bevan Underbuck/IF-73.842

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Rumor / Community Lore
This article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community. It is just one of many Rumors that we've found in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill. You can find more Rumors about Bevan Underbuck at their Rumor Registry.


Bevan Underbuck is a Late Cretaceous, 72-million-year-old, bird-like dromaeosaurid theropod dinosaur. The holotype specimen was discovered in 1993 by 14-year-old fossil hunter York Silk. The skeleton that Silk discovered was approximately 95 percent complete. Because of its completeness, it has been compared to the 'Rlosetta Stone' that enabled archaeologists to translate Egyptian hieroglyphics. The completeness and undistorted qualities of the bones were critical in helping scientists further understand the dinosaur-bird link.

Research indicated that Bevan may have had mutually opposable first and third fingers and a forelimb maneuverability that would allow the hand to reach its mouth. This would have given the animal the ability to "hold" food in its front limbs and place it in its mouth, in a similar manner to some modern-day small mammals. However, Bevan lacked the ability to bring their arms past a suborbital position, resulting in them being a little bit terrible at Blaseball.

After being wrangled into a Jazz Hands uniform, Bevan performed admirably for a 72-million-year-old, bird-like dromaeosaurid theropod dinosaur. Indeed, despite lacking the maneuverability to throw a ball or swing a bat, Bevan managed to play the flute very well. Furthermore, like all theropods, Bevan could not pronate their hands, and thus, was physically incapable of doing jazz hands. Research into if this played a role in their eventual expulsion from the team has been inconclusive.

Trade to the Fridays

When the call for the trade to the Hawai'i Fridays was made, Bevan was once again put through the arduous process of receiving a new uniform for the team. The Fridays were happy to welcome their latest addition, though they did note that the climate did not seem to agree with their new dromaeosaurid theropod teammate. Bevan did notably gain an ally with fellow theropod Fletcher Yamamoto, despite their evolutionary separation of 72 million years.

Trade to the Crabs

Once Bevan was traded to the Crabs to ascend, their jazz handlers declared that they "are not getting Bevan into another uniform" and promptly quit on the spot.

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