Arbutus Bones

From Blaseball Wiki


Arbutus Bones was a lineup player for the Pandemonium Artists. They are currently shadowed.

Official League Records

Bones joined Internet League Blaseball as a hitter for the Pandemonium Artists during the inaugural Coffee Cup.


COMMUNITY LORE

The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

History

Arbutus Bones, originally [REDACTED] Bones, was a hitchhiking artist who would wander aimlessly and leave a trail of art in their wake. Upon road-tripping to Pandemonium with Jonah Mosaic and Dunbar McLoud, they decided to settle down in the city with their fellow artists.

When the group accidentally duped their way into becoming a real blaseball team, Bones panicked, having never played the game before and with no stars to speak of. While exploring Pandora, they found a leaflet advertising 'FREE BLASEBALL SURGERY NEAR YOU! BE GOOD AT BLASEBALL WITH THIS FREE COOL SURGERY! TERMS AND CONDITIONS APPLY! CALL NOW 1800-REALDOCTOR!'. They took the leaflet at its word and signed up for the surgery. This procedure (performed in a back alley somewhere, covered in moss, smelt like copper) planted a cutting of the Angel Oak tree in their wrist. It is unclear what this was supposed to do, but it worked, and they are now good at blaseball.

The tree cutting grew faster than anticipated, and at the time of writing, they are 10% more tree than person. At some unclear point during this process, their name became Arbutus Bones. Their consciousness is increasingly shared with the tree, which slows their speech and makes them often unintelligible (either because they are speaking a language most people cannot understand, or because the human words they are saying do not make sense). They are also fast. Nobody has quite figured out how a tree can move that fast. When asked, Bones mumbles something about artistic license and won't speak any more on the subject.

Trivia

  • Bones believes they are good at giving advice due to the enlightened nature of being a tree. They are not. Their advice is nonsensical at best and five hours of uninterrupted silence during which you are to sit and listen at worst.
  • Originally, their art was constant and on every surface they could reach, all character drawings and scenes. With the addition of the tree in their blood, it has become abstract and expansive, and it is not uncommon for them to spent many days straight working on a piece.
  • The tree enjoys playing blaseball far more than the person does. This is the most major point of separation in Bones.
  • They are very happy to be here.


Fan Art