Annie Roland/Rumor Registry

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Annie Roland has 4 Rumors written about so far.

Annie Roland/IF-16.439

Annie Roland is a fairy and direct decedent of the French knight Roland. Her clan immigrated to the US National Park's system amid the chaos of the early twentieth century, and eventually settled down in Yellowstone for the Park's natural magical energy. Annie, first of her line, was born there, and has since vowed to protect her family's new home with a great deal of the same zest for life which possessed her ancestor. Early in her life, this manifested as a general harassment campaign of litterbugs and other irresponsible campers through a small army of trained (and increasingly armed) woodland creatures, but has since been refocused towards Blaseball at the worried pleas of Clan Roland's elders and Park Rangers alike. Since Roland's blaseball resurgence, patrons spotted littering at Yellowstone Magic games will sometimes be ejected from the Park in a kerfuffle of adorably militarized woodland creatures. Park Rangers have stated publicly that there are ongoing investigations into these incidents; however, no suspects have been identified.

Roland forced her way onto the team following the incineration of former Magic batter Richardson Turquoise, disgusted by the sheer violence which the Rogue Umpires had brought into the ParkPark for a third time. She is determined to prevent a fourth incident, and plays in full plate armor. While the exact effectiveness of this has yet to be seen, the extra weight of her equipment does impact her ability to round the blases.

As heir to the line of Roland, she is in possession of the Horn of Roland, which she carries with her at all times. When asked about the habit, she often replies with, "It never hurts to be prepared for the worst." With the the exact consequences of the Horn's use already shrouded in mystery, and the already volatile nature of the splort, Coach Merlinmeyer has attempted to convince Roland to leave the horn on the bench during games in order to prevent any magical disasters. He has not succeeded in the slightest.

Annie Roland/IF-32.035

Absolutely Unbearable

Annie is a park ranger for Yellowstone National Park Park. When they were young they got lost in Yellowstone as a scout. They grew up feral in the wilds. During their time in the wilds, they also became a werebear, who only turns into a bear known as "Roland" when there is a solar eclipse. Annie has no memory of their "Roland incidents." The Park Rangers recruited Annie for their intimate knowledge of the landscape, and their fierce protective love of the land. Annie has spent most of her adult life advocating for the untamed beauty of the wilds and picking up after Roland's messes. Annie often wakes up with zero coins and no memory of where they went. Annie hopes that the coins were donated to park conservation projects, however they sadly suspect that Roland has developed a secret Blittle League gambling problem. Annie believes blaseball may explain this Stevenson-esque predicament due to the frequent solar eclipses.

Annie also wears sunglasses at all times, never taking them off. Those that have seen a glimpse behind their shades have only babbled, "We would like to see it" incoherently before walking out to the woods. When questioned why they wear sunglasses, Annie tilted their head and said, "They keep out the sun. Why else would I wear them?"

Annie also collects vintage gravy boats. They just think they're neat.

Annie Roland/IF-86.753

Currently serving as a ranger at the Yellowstone ParkPark, Annie Roland is a Were-Bear who replaced Richardson "Turq" Turquoise after his unfortunate incineration. Annie is actually only the name of the human form, however, with Roland being the bear.

Annie is a Strongly-built park ranger with eyes that look like a solar eclipse, but are never seen because of the sunglasses they always have on. It is unclear if Annie themself knows this. They are always wearing an enamel pin shaped like a gravy boat, as well as collect gravy boats as a hobby, because "they're just neat-o," despite absolutely HATING the taste of gravy.

Annie joined the parks service after graduating from the Girl Scouts at age 5 (17 years ago) with a gold award, and is currently studying in collage for a degree which they have chosen not to disclose. The team quickly accepted them and they now serve to protect the other members of the Magic from danger, so as to prevent another peanut incident with Washer or incineration like Turq.

Their true unending quest is to find and bring to justice the person or thing that keeps rooting through the park trash cans, spreading litter everywhere. When asked about this quest, they responded, "I'll catch whoever's doing this, mark my words. They may be able to stay just out of reach for now, but they'll slip up eventually..." It should be noted that immediately following this interview, Annie was observed skidding in a puddle and landing on their behind.

The transformation into Roland occurs whenever the position of the team switches; Annie plays defense, Roland is up to bat.

Roland is a small-ish but still large black bear that can bee seen wandering around ParkPark with a bat between their jaws. One of Roland's favorite hobbies is digging through the park trash cans to find snacks and treats left by the visitors, fans, and staff; although Bevan Wise has commented on his disapproval of the bear's refusal to pick up after themself.

Roland can also be observed wearing their signature sunglasses, but on top of their head rather than over their eyes.

They act much like a lovable dog and get along very well with most of the team, but is very uneasy around the other animalistic members of the team such as Halex and Oscar, and does not seem to know what to make of Cory-12 or Washer. It should be noted that as Roland's vibes increase, their physical size can also be observed to increase, leading some to believe that the transformation has more to do with emotion than Blaseball itself. When asked about this phenomenon, they merely stated, "AGGAGAGAGHHGHGHGHGAAAAGHG," and proceeded to climb into a nearby dumpster, presumably to scavenge.

Additional Trivia

  • Both Forms share an extreme Hatred for the Rouge Umpires, as they seem to be targeting the Magic's More Natural players (Washer, Sosa, and Turq).
  • Annie refuses that they ever turn into Roland.
  • They earned their Girl Scouts gold award for starting a charity to support Trans Athletes in the splort of Blaseball.
  • They joined after Roland walked onto the field of play shortly after Turq's departure and picked up his bat, legally binding them to the team.
  • Annie is an avid organ player.

Annie Roland/IF-95.967

Annie Roland was an avid hiker who had a lot of interesting friends. One of them was Bevan Wise, who invited her to hike in the Yellowstone area when she had the chance. As an arcanist and spelunker, Wise takes any chance he can get to enthuse about his team's incredible park, and he convinced Annie to visit and see what the place had to offer.

At first it offered amazing views, majestic waterfalls, and enough wild animals to shake a blaseball bat at, if you wanted to shake a blaseball bat at them. Annie was munching a granola bar and watching a bear catch salmon in a river on day 40 of Season β5. She didn't really follow blaseball, and hadn't known it was ill advised to be so close to the game.

When Richardson Turquoise was incinerated, another player needed to be added to the game. Blaseball has to keep going, after all.

The problem isn't so much that Annie was pulled into the game, but that she was sort of pulled through the bear, who came along at the same time. Now Annie Roland is a player for the Yellowstone Magic. She seems pretty enthusiastic about the whole thing, even though she turns into a bear sometimes now. Or the bear comes back and lets Annie take a break? It's a little confusing. But she's strong and able to take the hot blaseball sun and she doesn't have to go back to whatever job she had before this. Things are looking up.

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