Wolf

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COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

The wolf is a backbone-sporting, furred animal in the order Carnivora. It is closely related to the fox, bear, mustelid and walrus, and less closely related to the cat and hyena.

Ecology

Wolves are carnivores and pack hunters, living in small family groups and coordinating (much like a blaseball team) to take down large prey. Wolves can live in a range of habitats, including Los Angeli, the Hellmouth, parking lots, Parkparks, The Bucket, community college campuses, and Europe.

Wolves are apex predators and provide important ecosystem services that extend far beyond population control of their prey species. They usually occupy the top of their local food chain, unless Igneus Delacruz is present.

Wolves produce offspring, called "pups", in groups of about five or six per season. Historically, during poor conditions where raising pups is not suitable, wolves would siphon lunar energy and inject it directly into suitable hosts to produce new wolves. This knowledge became lost or fragmented among wolves when they were driven extinct within their homeland, Yellowstone National Park, causing inexperienced wolves to produce incomplete, semi-lupine hybrids known as lycanthropes. The reintroduction of wolves to the Parkpark leaves many to hope wolves will be able to regain this knowledge.

Wolves demonstrate a range of complex social interactions, both intraspecific and interspecific. Some variants (see below) have even been known to play splorts like blaseball. Most wolves, however, seem to prefer gwolf.

Notable Variants

  • Canis dirus - Dire Wolves
  • Canis hadeae - Hellhounds
  • Canis latrans - Barking Wolf, aka coyotes
  • Canis familaris - Familiar Wolves, aka dogs

List of famous wolves

Trivia

  • Wolves generally increase in size the further they are located from the Equator. The "Kuiper Wolf" is a hypothesised outer-Solar-system organism with an estimated height of 600km at the shoulder.
  • Not a lot of dogs play blaseball, but most of them that do are called Beasley. We don't know why this is but we love 'em all the same.
  • Rules which prohibit or exclude wolves from playing a splort were generally frowned upon, until the ascension of President Bud to the Immaterial Splorts Board. Bud subsequently outlawed the drafting of such rules into Splorts law in a historic inaugural speech, claiming "Ain't no rules says a dog can't pass an executive order."
  • Wolves are the only megafauna known to thrive in the Hellmouth.

References

  1. Dogwalker's status as a "wolves" is hotly debated by academics and splortsfans, as it is seemingly impossible to reach a consensus on the matter of their physical form. She does, however, demonstrate the very "dog"like property of being "a good girls", and is thus tentatively included in this list.