Uncle Plasma IX

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Revision as of 18:08, 19 September 2021 by Lonestarlars (talk | contribs) (faded to dust + recruited)

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Uncle Plasma IX is a pitcher for the Kansas City Breath Mints, and has been with the team since the Season 23 elections. Plasma IX has played for the Breckenridge Jazz Hands.

Official League Records

Plasma IX joined the ILB as a pitcher for the Breckenridge Jazz Hands during the Season 22 Latesiesta via the Gift Shop.

During the Season 22 elections, Plasma IX gained the Negative modification as a result of the Complete 180 blessing. At the end of the Season, Plasma IX faded to Dust and returned to the Vault.

Plasma IX joined the pitching rotation of the Kansas City Breath Mints during the Season 23 elections via the Season 12: Uncle Indemnity blessing.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

History with the Breath Mints

On Season β15, Day 52, during a game of the New York Millennials against the Kansas City Breath Mints, Uncle Plasma entered the Crime Scene at The Meadow to investigate the mysterious disappearance of Brisket Friendo from the Breath Mints’ Shadows. As a prerequisite to the investigation, Breath Mints General Manager Max Betmint insisted that Plasma sign a temporary team transfer contract, as well as a non-disclosure agreement, confidentiality agreement, end-of-life plan, performance contract, digital image license, employee privacy policy, end user license agreement, letter of recommendation, equipment rental agreement, personal financial statement, hold-harmless indemnity agreement, survivorship deed, vehicle leasing agreement, website terms and conditions, and liability waiver. During the Season β15 elections, it was revealed that due to a hidden clause in the temporary team transfer contract, the contract was actually permanent, signing Uncle Plasma to Kansas City's pitching rotation for the foreseeable future.

After a few seasons with the Mints, Plasma began mentoring batter Kina Larsen as a junior detective, taking hir under his wing. A quick and eager learner, Larsen soon found far more investigative success than Plasma, having sought out and returned home numerous Elsewhere players, while Plasma has found exactly zero clues over many seasons with the Mints. When asked about Larsen’s talent in comparison to his own, Plasma has only glowed with pride, and is said to always keep an almond joy in the pocket of his trenchcoat for the young gumshoe. In his other pocket, he keeps a delicious fresh orange for himself.

Though a dedicated detective and pitcher, Plasma enjoys frequent vacations, often visiting Schlitterbahn Waterpark Kansas City after making use of The Meadow’s Fax Machine. Plasma does not seem bothered by the fact that the park has been closed for several years.

Plasma, like all Breath Mints, has failed the bar exam.


Excerpts from Plasma’s Notes

Uncle Plasma kept many notes scattered across journals, loose papers, and post-it notes pinned to corkboard. The following was found scribbled among Plasma’s notes. This time, the Interdimensional Rumor Mill reveals a Rumor from IF-5.855 out of its Rumor Registry...

just found out about Object Permanence... why didnt any one tell me about this crap[1]


Chants

Example of how to use the "get chapel killed" chant in chat.
  • Uncle Mode On
  • Nephew Mode (when performing poorly)
  • All according to Plansma!
  • Get Unc’d on!
  • get chapel killed
  • UNKIE NASTY (following Season β19 infusion)
  • Dunkle Plasma / Uncle Faxma (when getting Faxed)