Silvaire Roadhouse/Rumor Registry
Rumors
Silvaire Roadhouse has 6 Rumors written about so far.
Silvaire Roadhouse/IF-128.36
The Grands Roadhouse, The Devil of Carrol County, Silvaire the Pair, or most informally, Silvaire Roadhouse, is a granddaughter/grandfather pair. The former, Silvaire the Youngest, is an aspiring matador, always in her suit of lights and ready to kill. The latter, Silvaire the Eldest, was a man who loved his granddaughter so much that he picked up everything there is to know about cows and bulls when he heard his granddaughter speak of her dreams—and delved so deep into the study of the cow that he was imbibed with the Spirit of the West and became an immortal avatar of cowboyhood. Silvaire the Eldest imparts his True Knowledge of all things bovine to his granddaughter through astral projection.
Fans would watch a butch woman in elaborate matador garb, sword in hand, step up to plate, and suddenly undergo a dazzling magical girl transformation where she becomes an unwashed hick in a ten gallon hat.
Every time Silvaire pulls out her gun, it's a different gun, but it's always a revolver. Even when the gun is absolutely not a revolver.
Baltimore Crabs
Silvaire Roadhouse the Older and Silvaire Roadhouse the Younger were hired at around the same time by different members of the Baltimore Crabs, though for entirely different reasons. Howard and Dwayne had spoke with one retired cowboy friend of theirs, with whom they've had countless and untold misadventures, and had planned to bring them aboard the team as a coach for hitting home runs. Meanwhile, local trashboy Tillman Henderson had began to put into action a tax evasion scheme involving faking his death and squatting in the Crabitat, and had called Silvaire Roadhouse the Younger in order to help set up the pretense of assassination.
Unfortunately, Silvaire and her grandpa (giving her moral support through his astral-projected form) arrived just in time to witness Tillman go up in smoke, a final middle finger raised against the Umpires and the crowds, and, for lack of any other options in the stadium at the time, were promptly drafted into the team. Their first action was to hit a three-run home run—whether this was "a Tilly Triple from beyond the grave" or simply the new duo's strength is highly contested, but there is no doubt that the Silvaires are, most certainly, naturally born Crabs.
There was some discussion after the game of which Silvaire Roadhouse was the new batter but Howard and Dwayne wisely argued that the name on the contract (signed in Tillman’s ashy blood) only said Silvaire Roadhouse; it didn’t say which one. As such according to ILB regulations there’s no rule saying two people with the same name aren’t the same player.
Silvaire bats with an inherited gunbat that is also the gun she always has at her hip, maybe it's a trick of perspective. Sometimes instead of hitting the ball, she shoots it...in fact, as far as statisticians can tell, every time she tries to swing at the ball she misses or fouls and every time she shoots it she hits it squarely, but she still has to give it a good swing a couple times for some reason.
Silvaire Roadhouse has carcinized in that, every time she ever had to shoot a man, a tiny hermit crab crawled up and into the spent shell that fell at her feet, as a reminder of the lives she's taken. She is followed by a small herd of a little over a dozen of these crabs everywhere she goes.
Ascension
In Season 10 after making the run that killed the sun alongside Tot Fox, Silvaire Roadhouse and the rest of the Baltimore Crabs ascended to The Big Leagues, where she remained until the Crab’s return on Day 72 of season 12. Roadhouse Sr. however remained on the grounds of the Crabitat passing the time alongside Yurts Trunbo as they hoped for the return of the team. During this time he worked alongside the people of Baltimore to keep the city safe and operating for when his granddaughter returned.
This return however, was not as simple as they had hoped it would be. When the Crabs returned Roadhouse Jr. found that she was not unchanged from the fight on Day X, and had acquired a nasty flinch that hindered her ability to play. Despite dinally being reunited, the fuo found that they couldn't connect the way they used to - in some ways Silvaire Jr felt closer to Sr, being apart helped her grow and the experience matured her. In a very real way though, Silvaire Jr. was closed off to her grandfather, feeling useless and threatened, and unable to make her suffering and frustration known.
Return to the ILB
Despite their trepidations, the Crabs rocketed themselves to the championships and it seemed like even their curse could not stop their momentum, but as they began to slow, the responsibilities the team faced grew. Following the losses of Nagomi McDaniel, Alyssa Harrell, Jacoby Podcast, York Silk and Brock Forbes. And with the Crab’s captains now redacted, traded, and haunted there was a hole in the team that they were struggling to recover from.
It was Pedro Davids that reached out to Roadhouse and their new recruit Parker Meng to assist in captaining the team while Kennedy Loser recovered. The three of them were quick to get along well, though after a few tense arguments Meng and Davids did agree to “duke it out in a parking lot for a bit” at Roadhouse’s request. This was surprisingly effective, and Davids quickly grew to appreciate Meng’s experience as the three worked in tandem, while Roadhouse appreciated most things about Meng as they got to know each other. This victory was short lived however, as the losses began to pile up and Roadhouse found herself struggling to stay afloat.
The Boston Flowers
In Season 15 Roadhouse found herself unexpectedly being traded to Boston as a part of the second revival of Chorby Soul. While unexpected, this did reunite her with an old friend - Brock Forbes. Appreciating the familiar face she was quick to try and acclimatize, but found that there was something unexpected waiting for her.
A Debt - Returned with Interest
In season 21, after seasons of hardships had piled up, Silvaire roadhouse decided that she had had enough, and she was fed up with her shaking hands on the bat and flinching at half of the pitches thrown at her. In a moment of pure, unadulterated malice, she swung the bat and when her ball made contact with Walton Sports and discovered that it was a welcome change of pace. Refreshing even, when after seasons of loss Roadhouse finally felt like she could take something back. While her Debt hung over her as a curse, many of the Flowers took time to try and work through it with her, with Brock Forbes and Scores Baserunner passing on information about upcoming eclipses. Jaylen Hotdogfingers herself watched as Roadhouse spread instability though the league, though in all her time at the Flowers Roadhouse never cashed in a single unstable player for her debt, though it wasn’t entirely clear if it was from a lack of trying.
Return to Baltimore
In Season 22 Roadhouse returned to Baltimore in an unexpected trade with Adalberto Tosser after receiving news of a potential health issue for Roadhouse Sr. While he quickly recovered with his granddaughter at his side, the trade was permanent, and the two returned to their cohabitation in the old Roadhouse farm. Roadhouse Jr. was surprised to find Pedro Davids also staying in the farmhouse, as Roadhouse Sr. had invited him in after the loss of Valentine Games, sensing that Davids might appreciate some space. The two had grown surprisingly close over the last few seasons, with Roadhouse Sr. appreciating having company he didn’t need to astral project to. After the initial reunion things were uncomfortable between Roadhouse and the rest of the team, with many of the newer Crabs cautious to approach her now that she was debted and unrepentant, and the older Crabs worried for their friend, but unsure how to help.
As he often did, Kennedy Loser sought out Roadhouse Jr. to talk - inviting her over for dinner in a classic Crabs tradition. Loser spoke of a shared frustration with the trials the team had faced at the hands of gods, fans, and even on occasion other teams. Unfortunately this was not something Roadhouse was interested in hearing, and as she parted Loser could only wish he had been able to get through sooner.
A Balance Paid
In season 23 day 63 an unstable Helga Washington was incinerated and chained the effect to Jon Halifax, and when Halifax was incinerated the effect chained to Silvia Winner. On Day 90 Gunther O’Brian was incinerated, and his instability spread to Kaz Fiasco. On Day 97, Helga Moreno was incinerated and instability spread to Tot Fox.
When the deaths began, Roadhouse remained visibly unaffected, drawing a curtain between her and the world even as she saw teammates, former and current, put in her line of fire. Furious, it was Pedro Davids who took her to task on the subject. For all her loss he was quick to match his own, even as the only player left on the team with his flinch hanging over him. From there it was a realization that Roadhouse almost killed the fox who killed the sun with her, and that perhaps she might have other options. It’s not better right away, but After that it is different. She began to speak to others for the first time about how the game had affected her. - not all of the team, but the ones who were there on Day X, and there in the Big Leagues. While she still struggled not to lash out, she tried and one day she hoped she might get better.
The Horizon
In Season 24 the Baltimore Crabs steered themselves towards the Horizon, and Silvaire Roadhouse took the time to recover their confidence in themselves and their own control. Despite a marked increase in eclipse weather, not a single casualty of the season was a result of Silvaire’s debt. As the Blackhole (Blackhole) expanded, they found themselves at peace, and happy to be back in Baltimore for the end.Silvaire Roadhouse/IF-14.360
Silvaire Roadhouse is a half-minotaur on their ██████'s side. Minotaurs are already half-human, so it doesn't really show much but for the horns and the natural septum piercing and just being all around very scruffy, but they wear it well.
Whenever they stay in one spot too long, a corn maze sprouts up around them. For extended periods within the affected area, the maze bubbles into a spatial anomaly that grows impossibly more complex and overlapping nearer to its euclidean center. Within that part of the maze, trying to look up and over the stalks will reveal a plain of maize stretching off into the horizon in eternal afternoon.
Silvaire is always in the outfield of the Crabitat, even on away games. They can leave if they want to, but passing through the fractal corpsespace of the Mother Crab as a leaking spatial anomaly has lead to two instances of █████████ ███ █████ ████████ ██████, ███ ███ ███████ ██ ████████. Survivors have recovered after extensive therapy, but have sworn off corn and shellfish both.
Ascension
In Season 10 after making the run that killed the sun alongside Tot Fox, Silvaire Roadhouse and the rest of the Baltimore Crabs ascended to The Big Leagues, where they remained until the Crab’s return on Day 72 of season 12. However, upon their return Roadhouse found that they were not unchanged from the fight on Day X, and had acquired a nasty flinch that hindered their ability to play. As they returned to the game, it was one of many reminders of what they had gone through. Nonetheless the team rocketed themselves to the championships and it seemed like even their curse could not stop their momentum.
As the team entered season 15, they were plagued by redaction. Early in the season Roadhouse saw Forrest Best disappear after their game, and Nagomi Mcdaniel and Alyssa Harrell were both attacked multiple times by consumers, until they too were redacted in the semi finals of the postseason. It was then that teammate Brock Forbes revealed to both Roadhouse and Tot Fox that, based on his own knowledge, that the two of them were only a handful of attacks away from being redacted themselves. The two were left waiting for the next game to start, knowing it may have been their last, when Fox dragged Roadhouse to an old abandoned bunker that had previously been home to Best. The two of them spent the night there reflecting on what might be next, and in the morning before the Mild league finals, they each took a memento from Best’s collection of assorted fine clothes, accessories, and stolen goods. Roadhouse considered that, “stealing something just seems like what it would have wanted us to do.”
On the Boston Flowers
In Season 16 after the Plundering of Chorby Soul, Roadhouse was traded to the Boston Flowers where they were reunited with Brock Forbes.
A Debt - The Intent to Kill
From an early age Roundhouse was taught that to kill was to make a conscious decision made by the gunslinger. That it was about control, and that the worst sin of all was to fire your gun off without intent, and to kill without the conscious choice to do so. In season 20 Silvaire lost their Flinch modifier, and gained a Debt. With the dangerous potential crackling under their skin they made their own decisions, and Roadhouse had always been an excellent shot. Over the course of the season fans saw clean hits, singles, home runs, and anything that kept the ball away from the outfield, fouling to destroy stadium lights, fences, and trees over letting someone catch one of those deadly outs. For Roadhouse it was always their intent that mattered and they kept an iron grip on their newfound curse.
Return to the Crabs
In Season 22 Silvaire returned to the Baltimore Crabs, this time pitching, and continued their efforts to control their debt. As the seasons dragged on however, the debt hung heavy over Roadhouse’s shoulders. While the fans seemed to be confident that Roadhouse’s luck would continue, Roadhouse themself was gradually exhausted at the efforts required to keep the rest of the league safe. In season 23 the dam broke, and Roadhouse caused the unstable incinerations of Jon Halifax, Gunther O’Brian, Helga Moreno, and Helga Washington. This was a difficult time for Roadhouse as they searched for ways to deal with these emotions. It was said that they often returned to the Memorial Bat Gardens in Boston as a kind of repentance, trading out the outfield of the Crabitat for the walls of The Garden, even as their mazes sprouted around them and The Garden watched them grow.
The Horizon
In Season 24 the Baltimore Crabs steered themselves towards the Horizon, and Silvaire Roadhouse took the time to recover their confidence in themselves and their own control. Despite a marked increase in eclipse weather, not a single casualty of the season was a result of Silvaire’s debt. As the Blackhole (Blackhole) expanded, they found themselves at peace, and happy to be back in Baltimore for the end.Silvaire Roadhouse/IF-22.081
Standing at the threshold, the wood of these walls feels so painfully finite and fragile. Two expanses lay before you.
Outside, a deteriorating road stretches off in two directions off to forever, walled on both sides by an infinite breadth of some winding and unwending maize maze, a roadside attraction abandoned to its own devices. The sky is as big as skies get out here, as long as you stay out of the corn. Far and away, a thunderstorm makes her graceful migration over the fields. It's midafternoon and always has been. Don't go into the maze. Do not go into the maze.
Inside, a roadhouse, or a truck stop, or a dive bar, or a diner...but for a building so small against the backdrop of infinite corn, this building is deep. The kind of dive bar where you just keep diving. The further in, the seedier things feel, the radio always just a little off-tune for the channel it's playing, whoever's manning the counter looks weary and it isn't because you haven't ever seen them change shifts. It's dark out through the windows when there are windows. The blueberry pancakes here are divine, and the coffee is literally bottomless.
And Silvaire? He's the walls that keep them separated.Silvaire Roadhouse/IF-37.797
The Grands Roadhouse, The Devil of Carrol County, Silvaire the Pair, or most informally, Silvaire Roadhouse, is a granddaughter/grandfather pair of cowboys. The former, Silvaire the Youngest, is a gunslinging butch who looks for horse in all the wrong places. The latter, Silvaire the Eldest, is her immortal grandfather, one of the greatest cowboys in the world and perhaps even in the west, who has joined his consciousness with hers in order to commit great acts of wranglery and frontiersmanship.
Silvaire the Eldest
Not much is known about Silvaire the Eldest's early life. He has said in interviews that he was born in Haiti, but hasn't let slip much more than that. However, behavior patterns and description matched across recovered diaries, newspapers, letters, and county archives have granted historians surprisingly comprehensive insight into his life on the frontier.
One account describes Silvaire the Eldest asEvery time he walked into a saloon, the pianist would abruptly stop and all conversation would pause for a tense moment. He meandered the territories performing odd jobs and misadventures that include but are not limited to, ranch handing, fending off bandits, rootin' and tootin', clearing out corrupt sheriffs in the only language they'd listen to, caravan driving, killing giants that he mistook for windmills, train robbing, evading a bounty, barn raising, prospecting, and, of course, ranch handing. It is unknown when or why he was cursed with immortality, but being a good cowboy is an essential component.A stranger in town...swallowed by the shade of his hat, with eyes stormy and still...he spoke few words, but those words were rich as cream, their accent thicker...knew his way around cattle better than most men know themselves
As the West settled into the 20th century, he became unmoored, and faded from the written record (except for a very, very brief stint managing a cabaret and possible speakeasy). According to interviews, he said "I knew that immortality meant the world would move past me, but I hadn't expected it to be so soon. It was only after I met ████████, my wife and the love of my life, that I learned how to carve a little place for myself out in the world." The two of them settled down in Oklahoma to raise cattle for a time. During the height of the Dust Bowl, Silvaire the Eldest was seen roaming the land bringing provisions and aid to residents, and faded into folk legend. Thereafter, he was known only by word of mouth from the greatest contemporary cowboys, helping out in a detached way, or coming forward in times of great cow-related crisis, knowing that "though the Wild West is long behind us, there will always be a something in this world needing doin' that only a cowboy can do."
When Silvaire the Youngest was born, her grandfather's love for her brought him out of isolation. He moved to Baltimore to be nearer to her and taught her everything he knew (though she could never figure out horses), and in turn relearned how to be a part of the world. He began practicing interdisciplinary cowboying and took the art of wrangling to new heights. The bond they shared became so powerful that they became able to communicate through one another telepathically.
Silvaire the Youngest
Silvaire the Youngest is horse-blind. She has been seen riding animals like deer, turtles, big isopods, giraffes, █████████, alligators, whales, eagles, and so on, but she just can't really tell what is or isn't a horse—so she assumes they all are, just in case. If it's got four legs, if it's rideable, and if it's got the right attitude, it's a horse...and settling for two out of three of those is good enough sometimes. Cow? Horse. Chair? Horse? Forrest Best? You betcha ass that's a horse. As for horses, well, it's probably stranger yet that there just hasn't been a situation where she and a horse were in a room together, and people have tried, too.
One account describes Silvaire the Youngest asEvery time she walked into a bar or club, the DJ would play that generic record scratch sound and all conversation would pause for a tense moment. She wears a bird skull on a necklace and a big iron inherited from her grandfather. Despite living well within city limits, she continues to do cowboy things in Baltimore such as cattle driving through Fells Point, cooking chili in alleyways, and repeatedly practicing the "wauwauwaaaah" sound from the Good The Bad And The Ugly theme to herself as she rides around on her not horse.Lebsbian...she can't stop saying cowboy clichés...has never lost a game of pool, always loses a game of Texas hold'em...a crack shot with spread like frozen butter...her hair is butch but I honestly don't have more to say, it's just like, every butch 'do simultaneously...she broke my nose
Silvaire the Youngest did not telepathically channel the power of her grandfather until she was █9, since projecting or hosting the consciousness of another is a seventh level cowboy invocation that cannot be rushed. In her lonesome early life, she put her fledgling cowboy skills to good use: crime. Causing controlled stampedes, she brought unknowable costs in property damage to the meat and dairy industry in the northeast. The bounty on her head was never collected, when questioned about how she's evaded the law thus far she responded, "turns out, if you shoot the deputy too, there's no one left to get you."
Baltimore Crabs
Silvaire Roadhouse the Older and Silvaire Roadhouse the Younger were hired at around the same time by different members of the Baltimore Crabs, though for entirely different reasons. Howard and Dwayne had spoken with one retired cowboy friend of theirs, with whom they've had countless and untold misadventures, and had planned to bring them aboard the team as a coach for hitting home runs. Meanwhile, local trashboy Tillman Henderson had began to put into action a tax evasion scheme involving faking his death and squatting in the Crabitat, and had called butch cowboy and gunslinger Silvaire Roadhouse the Younger in order to help set up the pretense of assassination.
Unfortunately, Silvaire and her grandpa (giving her moral support through his astral-projected form) arrived just in time to witness Tillman go up in smoke, a final middle finger raised against the Umpiress and the crowds, and, for lack of any other options in the stadium at the time, were promptly drafted into the team. Their first action was to hit a three-run home run—whether this was "a Tilly Triple from beyond the grave" or simply the new duo's strength is highly contested, but there is no doubt that the Silvaires are, most certainly, naturally born Crabs.
There was some discussion after the game of which Silvaire Roadhouse was the new batter but Howard and Dwayne wisely argued that the name on the contract (signed in Tillman’s ashy blood) only said Silvaire Roadhouse; it didn’t say which one. As such according to ILB regulations there’s no rule saying two people with the same name aren’t the same player.
Silvaire bats with an inherited gunbat that is also the gun she always has at her hip, maybe it's a trick of perspective. Sometimes instead of hitting the ball, she shoots it...in fact, as far as statisticians can tell, every time she tries to swing at the ball she misses or fouls and every time she shoots it she hits it squarely, but she still has to give it a good swing a couple times for some reason.
Silvaire Roadhouse has carcinized in that, every time she ever had to shoot a man, a tiny hermit crab crawled up and into the spent shell that fell at her feet, as a reminder of the lives she's taken. She is followed by a small herd of a little over a dozen of these crabs everywhere she goes.
Ascension
In Season 10 after making the run that killed the sun alongside Tot Fox, Silvaire Roadhouse and the rest of the Baltimore Crabs ascended to The Big Leagues, where she remained until the Crab’s return on Day 72 of season 12. Roadhouse Sr. however remained on the grounds of the Crabitat passing the time alongside Yurts Trunbo as they hoped for the return of the team. During this time he worked alongside the people of Baltimore to keep the city safe and operating for when his granddaughter returned.
Return to the ILB
Upon Roadhouse Jr’s return she found that she was not unchanged from the fight on Day X, and had acquired a nasty flinch that hindered her ability to play. As she returned to the game, it was one of many reminders of what they all had gone through. Nonetheless the team rocketed themselves to the championships and it seemed like even their curse could not stop their momentum, but as they began to slow, the responsibilities the team faced grew. Following the losses of Nagomi McDaniel, Alyssa Harrell, Jacoby Podcast, York Silk and Brock Forbes. And with the Crab’s captains now redacted, traded, and haunted there was a hole in the team that they were struggling to recover from.
It was Pedro Davids that reached out to Roadhouse and their new recruit Parker Meng to assist in captaining the team while Kennedy Loser recovered. The three of them were quick to get along well, though after a few tense arguments Meng and Davids did agree to “duke it out in a parking lot for a bit” at Roadhouse’s request. This was surprisingly effective, and Davids quickly grew to appreciate Meng’s experience as the three worked in tandem, while Roadhouse appreciated most things about Meng as they got to know each other. This victory was short lived however, as the losses began to pile up and Roadhouse found herself struggling to stay afloat.
The Boston Flowers
In Season 15 Roadhouse found herself unexpectedly being traded to Boston as a part of the second revival of Chorby Soul. While unexpected, this did reunite her with an old friend - Brock Forbes. Appreciating the familiar face she was quick to try and acclimatize, but found that there was something unexpected waiting for her.
A Debt - Returned with Interest
In season 21, after seasons of hardships had piled up, Silvaire roadhouse decided that she had had enough, and she was fed up with her shaking hands on the bat and flinching at half of the pitches thrown at her. In a moment of pure, unadulterated malice, she swung the bat and when her ball made contact with Walton Sports and discovered that it was a welcome change of pace. Refreshing even, when after seasons of loss Roadhouse finally felt like she could take something back. While her Debt hung over her as a curse, many of the Flowers took time to try and work through it with her, with Brock Forbes and Scores Baserunner passing on information about upcoming eclipses. Jaylen Hotdogfingers herself watched as Roadhouse spread instability though the league, though in all her time at the Flowers Roadhouse never cashed in a single unstable player for her debt, though it wasn’t entirely clear if it was from a lack of trying.
Return to Baltimore
In season 22 Roadhouse was traded back to the Baltimore Crabs, this time for her old friend Adalberto Tosser. While this did reunite him with Brock Forbes, it did leave Roadhouse pitching, which was a new challenge for her, though luckily Roadhouse Sr. was there to assist. Likewise, it seemed that Kennedy Loser had begun to return to himself, and the Crabs as a whole had ended up in a place of relative stability. Many of the older Crabs seemed unphased by Roadhouse’s new condition, though many of the newer team members were keeping their distance. As she continued to manage her debt as best she could, only letting her anger spike out rarely, and aiming for Fireaters when she could manage it, Roadhouse managed to keep it together longer than many people expected.
In season 22 it was league renowned player Jessica Telephone that reached out to her to talk over dinner. Coming with her own history of Day X in the Discipline Era, Telephone spoke frankly to Roadhouse about what might happen next. Speaking of the difference between fault and responsibility, and of what you can control and what you cannot. Privately she quickly realized that her words weren’t sinking in for Roadhouse and could only hope that when the time finally came, she would remember them.
Balance Paid
In season 23 day 63 an unstable Helga Washington was incinerated and chained the effect to Jon Halifax, and when Halifax was incinerated the effect chained to Silvia Winner. On Day 90 Gunther O’Brian was incinerated, and his instability spread to Kaz Fiasco. On Day 97, Helga Moreno was incinerated and instability spread to Tot Fox.
As the deaths began to pile up, Roadhouse watched as her instability spread to teammates and friends, describing it as “fate making a punishment for those who thought they could get away with this for so long”. When the time came, Roadhouse made a request of Yurts Trunbo to allow her four victims to be memorialized in the way traditional to Crabs players - having their ashes turned into Memorial Pearls and distributed to their loved ones. Trumbo agreed to the request, and Roadhouse offered to personally deliver the pearls to those who were willing to see her. This led to some heartfelt reunions, difficult conversations, and rejected apologies, but they were steps Roadhouse felt that she had to take, with one such conversation centering around her former co-captain Parker Meng during the delivery of Helga Moreno’s remains.
The Horizon
In Season 24 the Baltimore Crabs steered themselves towards the Horizon, and Silvaire Roadhouse took the time to recover their confidence in themselves and their own control. Despite a marked increase in eclipse weather, not a single casualty of the season was a result of Silvaire’s debt. As the Blackhole (Blackhole) expanded, they found themselves at peace, and happy to be back in Baltimore for the end.Silvaire Roadhouse/IF-49.288
In Literature
Crabs Poet Laureatre Runolfio Peeper wrote the following about Roadhouse:
On the sunless day when we
lost Tillman Henderson—that real
heel—a sudden swell of cool
air swept through the stands, and we
all turned toward the bay beyond the left
field bleachers where a silky school
of fish burst from the depths, and we
saw Silvaire—the matador to strike
the gods—the saloon-born sheriff straight
from Haiti. So spoke Silvaire then, and we
fraught fans listened: “I come to sing
words of wisdom to starve out sin:
never underestimate your rival, and we
best expect the unexpected, a thin
chance can bloom to the point we gin
up fantastic wins, and forever more we
must be nice.” Silvaire strode to bat with jazz
horns as a walk-up tune, the June
sun burning behind the moon, and we
heard them say, “Pain don’t hurt, for we die
Anyways, always, burning and soon.”
Silvaire Roadhouse/IF-57.167
Ascension
In Season 10 after making the run that killed the sun alongside Tot Fox, Silvaire Roadhouse and the rest of the Baltimore Crabs ascended to The Big Leagues, where she remained until the Crab’s return on Day 72 of season 12. Roadhouse Sr. however remained on the grounds of the Crabitat passing the time alongside Yurts Trunbo as they hoped for the return of the team. During this time he worked alongside the people of Baltimore to keep the city safe and operating for when his granddaughter returned.
This return however, was not as simple as they had hoped it would be. When the Crabs returned Roadhouse Jr. found that she was not unchanged from the fight on Day X, and had acquired a nasty flinch that hindered her ability to play. Despite dinally being reunited, the fuo found that they couldn't connect the way they used to - in some ways Silvaire Jr felt closer to Sr, being apart helped her grow and the experience matured her. In a very real way though, Silvaire Jr. was closed off to her grandfather, feeling useless and threatened, and unable to make her suffering and frustration known.
Descensions, of Another Sort
An Act of Lances
Dark tidings were afoot in the Internet League. Everyone smelled it coming. One resurrection might be a miracle. Two makes a pattern. But three? Three would be systemic.
When Chorby Soul first took the league by storm, the Crabs were too busy fighting their own fight to process. York Silk's own resurrection had him held in precarious balance, coping with his own death and rebirth, his calm and his far, far from calm. Forrest Best, Alyssa Harrell, and Nagomi McDaniel vanished without a trace, and even if the team could see that it was all connected, they were left reeling. Tripping at the finish line, the bitten and battered Crabs choked in the semifinals, and it felt like all their losses were in vain. Silvaire, especially, struggled for air. Alone and spiraling, she reached out, and grasped for something to anchor her in the flood.
On the last day of the season, the Moist Talkers shut out the Wild Wings under the maelstrom song of the Black Hole, and Silvaire wasn't watching the game. She was listening, she was reaching. Not outwards, to family, nor comrades, nor the ghosts of her god, but reaching in, stoking the coal of her frustrations with that hungry, beautiful song, and reaching, reaching, for purpose.
She found it. On the Season 15 election, the Baltimore Crabs were dismantled. On the first day of Season 16, there was nobody left to stop her.
An Act of Pikes
York was Silvaire's one lead on the chaos unfolding throughout the league. Though he was off the team—only there because of his mom, and left the first chance he got—the two of them had been fast friends that one season. Over the phone, he explained what little he could. It wasn't enough.[1]
Silvaire has always been a decent player of the splort, but she had a knack for the big picture, seeing the stars aligning, seeing the game behind the game. It was part of why Brock Forbes took particular interest in training her. He was gone now, too. Having so little to work with was deeply aggravating. So when Silvaire, two strikes down, caught sight of Brisket Friendo suddenly standing on second base that first game, she didn't hesitate to fire off her signature home gun. Grabbing Friendo by the collar as she passed second base, she dragged them home and right to the dugout, determined to pull on this thread until the whole damn thing unraveled.
After witnessing her rash behavior, the team was very, very split on Silvaire. Tot Fox and Luis Acevedo were ravenously enabling her investigating, Pedro Davids and Parker Meng were trying desperately to reel her in before she blew up the team, or herself, probably both. Fish Summer was new, Kennedy Loser was haunted, the rest of the Crabs were just trying to keep everything together.
Parker Meng was particularly incensed over this. She just arrived on the team at the request of Pedro Davids to help reorganize after losing all three team captains in a sense last season, and it seemed like she was set on Day 1 to get dragged down with them into this mess. The two of them had thought to loop Silvaire in on managing the team, but she was on a warpath with no dissuasion, and if the three of them were ever in a room together Pedro would find himself having to mediate more often than he could deal with his own responsibilities.
Not even two weeks had passed when Silvaire got stranger. On Day 16, Tot Fox scored a solo home run, and passing by Alston Cerveza at third base, communicated something to him that opened his ears to the horror and the beauty of the Black Hole's aria. The two of them came to the dugout together, where Cerveza was given a temporary jersey and commemorative merch. Since witnessing this, Silvaire was especially quiet. Her bat had broken earlier in that same game, perhaps it was a signifier of something to come. It's hard to read the stars under the accretion disk, but perhaps the Black Hole was the only star they needed aligning. Finally, she had a plan.
Over the next forty games, something changed in the team. One by one, they were tentatively on board with Silvaire's agenda. It had a dozen moving parts, and if any one of them went wrong it would end in failure, but the math checked out. Even some of Kennedy's ghosts seemed into it. Everyone but Meng, whose animosity hardened with her skepticism. The two of them took on the role of nemeses, which amounted to...doing the others' work behind her back, driving Pedro up the wall, and a lot of glaring from across the room. It was kind of tame, actually, as if even Meng started to wonder if this might just work. And on Silvaire's end, maybe she just warmed up to her along the way.
It's no coincidence that on Day 56, the two players on base when Silvaire carcinized Alston a second time were her biggest ally, Tot Fox and her remaining cynic, Parker Meng.[2] It was as if she were taunting Silvaire, telling her to go ahead, mess it all up. She didn't. Again, the nauseating ecstasy of the Black Hole shook Alston to his core. In the dugout, Silvaire explained everything, the paperwork was signed, and the plan set in motion. After the game, Alston returned to the Moist Talkers, and they sorted out their end of the deal.
The Crabs are ecstatic. They'll still have a ways to go, pitching especially, and there are still a few essential things left to wrap up, like firing Fish Summer out of a cannon, but with everything locked in, they'll have fixed their lineup and credit score in a single season. Brisket Friendo will see play, and the league will finally have some answers. With the pressure off, Meng finally relented and let Silvaire have a moment to gloat before the two of them made peace, if anything for Davids' sake, and the three of them took on captaining responsibilities smoothly for the rest of the season. If that were the whole plan.
But Silvaire had a knack for the big picture, and contingencies had to be made. Thirty two days later, the stars aligned. Chorby Soul dies a second time. While Meng and Davids' are out of the office, Silvaire files a second round of paperwork.
In the Season 16 elections, when Chorby Soul again took the league by storm, Silvaire was ready. The answers they'll all wait for are essential, but they didn't satisfy, they didn't fulfill her hunger for purpose. Chorby Soul rose, and immediately switched out for Silvaire, dropped right into the hornet's nest. In Boston, of all places. She wasn't going to wait around for answers, damn the consequences, the Crabs can handle Chorby on their own. She looked around the room she found herself in, got to work on wringing out the answers herself, and there was nobody left to stop her. Perhaps she came to regret that.
An Act of Death
Silvaire played for the Flowers, and very little more can be said. Whatever paths that thread led her down took her far, far from the batting box. After a game, she left to continue the faena. Brock Forbes, the only familiar face on the team, maybe knew more than he let on, but he wouldn't divulge details to anyone. He was more aware than most the dangers when one is in so deep.
On the first day of Season 17, Chorby Soul died a third time. On the second day, Luis Acevedo followed. If Silvaire had something to say for it, she said it where no one heard.
The only correspondence between Silvaire and another person during this time was a madly scrawled letter to her grandfather, Silvaire Sr., on the eve of Season 21, the contents of which he hasn't disclosed.
When Silvaire was next seen, the number of hermit crabs in her wake had doubled. Her hands were steady and her eyes fixed cleanly on the pitcher. Unflinching eyes, and hands stilled by the certainty of one's own failure. Maybe she got those answers she was looking for all this time, but she never said. Maybe she even felt like she saw her purpose through, but she never said.
When Silvaire hit Walton Sports with a ball, no eyes looked their direction. Her debt wasn't like their debt. She brought back the old ways.
A Porta Gayola
When the bull dies, they bring out the next. Silvaire held back on the Flowers, not a single instability chained during Season 21. The next season, she returned to the Crabs, and as a pitcher. There, too, she held back. As she readjusted to a more normal life in the chaos of the late Expansion Era, learned about the new developments she barely paid attention to, the new faces, the new worries, something brewed in her mind.
Whatever her intents were in Season 23 are unknown, but the pattern was made clear when Silvaire stopped holding back:
- Helga Washington was incinerated, and the instability chained to Jon Halifax, incinerating him as well.
- Gunther O'Brian was incinerated, and the instability chained to Kaz Fiasco, surviving
- Helga Moreno was targeted three times, and incinerated the third, and the instability chained to Tot Fox, surviving
- Tot Clark was targeted three times, surviving, only to be incinerated by a rogue umpire next season
Jon Halifax and Tot Fox were ex-Crabs, Kaz Fiasco a current Crab, all of which could be considered some of the more capable on the roster, in the absence of the incinerated or the preserved. Helga Moreno was partnered to Parker Meng, and Tot Clark to the late Luis Acevedo, both of whom Silvaire had left behind without closure to go after the ressurectors.
Silvaire had not struck a single Crab or ex-Crab during her instability, even when on the Flowers, but her target pattern clearly showed indirect strikes, both literal and otherwise, against her teammates. She always had a knack for seeing the game behind the game.
- ↑ Perhaps by design. After all, he did redact one of the lead investigators. Did they get too close?
- ↑ Or perhaps it was, since it's all happening in a simulator, but don't tell the wiki people that, they'll lose their minds
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