Scores Baserunner

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Scores Baserunner is a lineup player for the Boston Flowers, and has been with the team since the end of Season 9.

Official League Records

Baserunner joined the ILB as a hitter for the Boston Flowers on at the end of Season 9 via the New Recruit blessing.

At the end of Season 10, the Unlimited Tacos won the Sharing Signs blessing, resulting in an increase in batting from ★★★½  to ★★★★.

During the Flowers' Season 11, Day 92 game against the Houston Spies, Baserunner partied and received a ½-star boost to defense.

During the Flowers' Season 11, Day 99 game against the Hellmouth Sunbeams, Baserunner partied and received a ½-star boost to batting, pitching, and baserunning.

In Season 11, Baserunner ended the season leading the Boston Flowers with a 0.336 Batting Average, the 8th highest in the league[1].

During the Coffee Cup, Baserunner played for Atlético Latte as a lineup player.

On Season 17, Day 25 Baserunner became a pitcher due to Reverb.

During the Season 17 elections, Baserunner became a lineup player via the Flowers' Move will.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Early Life

Baserunner grew up in the Fens as part of a large family of Fenmaids. Her interest in the statistical side of Blaseball began at an early age. According to one of her siblings, she "was a pretty weird kid. She was always obsessively watching Blaseball games and scribbling things in little notebooks. Also, we all supported her changing her name, but isn't Scores Baserunner a little on the nose?"

In an interview, Baserunner's mothers both expressed support of her and her choices, although they did suggest that she come back home to the Fens when she's done trying "that Blaseball thing".

To Baserunner, blaseball was no small “thing”. Baserunner shared secrets into her early years as a young blaseball fan in her grand siesta interview with Splorts Yearly, describing her childhood as, “a state of total obsession. I was just mesmerized by the splort. I still have all the posters I hung in my room and all the Tlopps cards I collected. One time, Beck Whitney signed a picture I drew of her when I was about 10. I still have it framed on my bedside table. Easily one of the best days of my life!”

Career on the Flowers

Baserunner initially applied for a position on the Flowers staff, eager to be a part of their favorite team, but captain Margarito Nava recognized that their rules knowledge and Blaseball skills would be invaluable to the Flowers and asked her to join the lineup. Baserunner was overjoyed and, some report, extremely flustered to become teammates with her heroes.

Baserunner is a talented batter, which she attributes to the many, many hours of training she did before joining the team. She uses a wheelchair to move around on land and can be seen speeding from base to base with it. She also contributes to team strategies, frequently offering her opinion on how the team can succeed (or, if not succeed, reach an interesting outcome, statistically) based on her analysis of the game.

Since joining the team, Baserunner has gained a reputation for taunting opponents, offering statistical analyses of why the opposing team will fail and the Flowers, especially Baserunner herself, will succeed. This hasn’t seemed to damage the Flowers' relationship with other teams. Margarito Nava has commented, "Sure, she can be aggressive, but I don't think anyone sees any harm in it—everyone knows it's all in good fun. Although I did see Scores promise to punch a player from the Magic if they kept threatening King Weatherman."

“Rivalry” With SIBR and Subsequent Adoption

Beginning of Rivalry

In the first few weeks of play in Season 10, Blaseball fans were perplexed to find that Baserunner’s RBI total was -7 in SIBR’s reports. Upon being alerted to this, the researchers of SIBR raced to figure out what the problem was. It was soon discovered that the names Scores and Baserunner were both terms used in the analysis that SIBR used to track several stats, and Scores’ existence “borked the regex cos there’s no, like, API code for “a runner has scored” or anything. It’s all just in text,” explains a data witch of the society. However, the witch explained that the problem has since been solved . When asked if Baserunner, therefore, had no power here, the data witches expressed that Baserunner was actually very powerful and that the interviewer should leave.

Upon hearing about the turmoil her name caused to the researchers, Baserunner reportedly laughed for 13 minutes without taking in a breath. With a seeming fire in her eyes, Baserunner said “Not even a season in and I have a worthy rival, it seems…” then disappeared in a cloud of brackish smoke.

Math Ban

The rivalry remained a one-sided affair until SIBR, after a very trying first few weeks of Season 11, banned math from the society. This upset Baserunner, who had forged a strong friendship with spies batter Math Velasquez. In retaliation, Baserunner threatened to curse SIBR should they continue to uphold the math ban, much to Velasquez’s relief and admiration. SIBR quickly unbanned math. This threat would then be repeated after math was banned from the courtroom in the New York Millennials v. Parker MacMillan III et al. court case, but they could not be carried out due to Baserunner being banned from the Hellmouth courtroom and all other courtrooms for that matter.

Friendship and Coffee Cup

Soon after the incineration of Parker MacMillan III, Baserunner initiated the natural response to any long term rivalry and began to become friends with SIBR as a whole. When asked about this sudden shift in attitude, Baserunner told reporters, “I’m tired of antagonizing them. They went through a lot during that case, and honestly, data magicians of any kind should stick together. We’ve got too many predators as it is.” Baserunner would not comment further on the latter part of that statement.

When the Coffee Cup was announced by Parker MacMillan IIII along with the invitation of the Society Data Witches, Baserunner quickly took this opportunity to “add to [her] collection of friends,” as she put it in her Boston Gobe: The Coffee Cup interview. Baserunner and the collective Data Witches attempted a grassroots campaign to get her on the team but ultimately failed, as Baserunner was drafted onto the Atlético Latte team. Baserunner played valiantly in the first two rounds of the Cup but was knocked out of the Cup by the Data Witches themselves.

Transfer Attempt and Adoption

In an attempt to both make Baserunner feel better after her humiliating defeat in round 2 of the Coffee Cup and gain a much-needed leg up in their upcoming round, the Society Data Witches used the apocryphal ILB Form 1163: Application for Player Trade or Transfer to secure Baserunner’s position as an additional batter in their lineup. After multiple attempts to fax said form to the ILB’s office, SIBR submitted the document directly to Parker MacMillan IIII via a message on their official Twitter, much to MacMillan’s IIIII confusion and chagrin. MacMillan IIIII ultimately denied the transfer, but only after signing the form under the section titled “Source Player’s Parent/Guardian’s Signature”, implying that MacMillan IIIII was Baserunner’s parent/guardian. While this may seem a simple mistake, the form states that any signer of the form is subject to the penalty of incineration if any foregoing information is not true, a fact that was immediately brought to MacMillan IIIII’s attention (to which he replied “what”). Due to the fact that MacMillan IIIII was not incinerated, it is logical to assume that the statement is true, and therefore Baserunner has been assumed to be adopted by MacMillan IIIII. Baserunner was overjoyed at the news that she had gained a father and quickly took to calling MacMillan IIIII “Dad”.

Baserunner attempted to talk with Parker MacMillan IIIII for a week with no response until MacMillan IIIII mentioned in a conversation with BC Noir’s Uncle Plasma that forms had gotten enough trouble already, causing Baserunner to believe that he was talking about her. Baserunner, already emotionally strained from being ignored by MacMillan IIIII for a week, renounced her desire for a relationship with him. After seeing how bad a state she was in due to this disappointment, Miami Dale batter Beck Whitney and released former Boston Flowers batter Caligula Lotus formally adopted Baserunner.

Magical Abilities and Curses

Baserunner's skill with mathematics and statistics allows her to affect the world around her, leading some to refer to her as a "stlats witch". Baserunner does not hesitate to use these abilities to gain an advantage in Blaseball, a tactic that has created a long-running argument between Baserunner and King Weatherman, who holds that the use of magic is unfair.

Reportedly, her magic has enabled her to uncover Forbidden Knowledge about Blaseball. However, this could not be confirmed, because when she tries to explain the information, nobody else can remember what she said.

Baserunner insists that this is one of her many curses that she gained after performing “The Rite”. Baserunner, in an interview with The Boston Gobe, provided vague details about The Rite, stating, “I don't want to give too much away, ya know? A curse is a horrible thing to pass on, let alone thirteen! Besides, if another team had a stlats witch on it then they’d have a leg up too. Could you imagine if the Dale got one? It’d be bedlam!”

The list of Baserunner’s curses is as follows:

1. Curse of Obfuscation. Affectionately called “Curse of the 4th Wall” by Baserunner, this curse prevents her from being understood when talking about forbidden knowledge.

2. Curse of Raucous Announcement. One of Baserunner’s favorites , this curse causes Baserunner to only be able to shout her name. Likewise, when typing her name she may only do so in all caps.

3. Curse of Stolen Scent. Baserunner has been cursed with anosmia or the lack of a sense of smell.

4. Curse of Imbibement. Baserunner cannot taste alcohol. Instead, she tastes what is most repugnant to her. In her case, it is cherry cough syrup.

5. This curse is not yet known.

6. Curse of Dampened Flame. Baserunner struggles to light matches, candles, or lighters as if a strong wind was causing the flame to be put out.

7.  Curse of Desynchronicity. Baserunner shall be chronically late to everything. Lines, traffic lights, elevators, and other sources of tardiness shall always hold her up.

8. Curse of Grim Chance. Baserunner shall always lose competitive games of chance such as dice, cards, or coin tosses.

9. This curse is not yet known.

10. Curse of Invitation. Baserunner is emotionally compelled to accept any invitation given to her in good faith.

11. Curse of the Frozen Mind. Baserunner is incredibly sensitive to cold beverages and other frozen treats and is cursed to get brain freezes extremely easily.

12. Curse of the Profane Tongue. Baserunner cannot swear without causing minor pain to be inflicted on her.

13. This curse is not yet known.

Rulebook

Although her collection of notes, spreadsheets, and binders full of Tlopps cards is extensive, Baserunner takes particular care of one notebook: a homemade rulebook where she has assembled all of the known and speculative rules of The Book of Blaseball. As Baserunner uncovered more rules via detailed observation of Blaseball games, advanced statistical calculations, and strange math-based rituals, her rulebook developed an eldritch power that echoes the Forbidden Book itself. The rulebook now floats by her side, and some have even reported hearing it talk to her.

Gallery