Reese Clark

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Reese Clark is a player for the Baltimore Crabs, and has been with the team since Fall Ball. Clark has previously played for the Houston Spies.

Official League Records

Clark joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Houston Spies with the Return of Blaseball.

During the Season β9 election, Clark received the Fire Eater modification due to the passing of the Forecast: Eclipse decree.

During the Coffee Cup, Clark played for Cream & Sugar United as a lineup player.

On Season β23, Day 46, Clark retreated to the Spies' Shadows in exchange for Siobhan Chark at An Undisclosed Location via the Ratified Voicemail.

During the November 18, 2022 Fall Ball, Clark fell to the Baltimore Crabs.

History

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Reese Clark's primary physical trait is in fact their complete lack of a primary physical trait—where one might expect to find face and facial features, Clark instead has a stretch of perfectly smooth skin. There is no evidence of a skull beneath this face, but, thanks to modern prosthetic technology, Clark has access to a wide array of plastic facial features and accessories allowing them to customize their appearance to their heart's content. Clark regularly assures Blaseball fans that this capability will never be used for any form of sneaking, blending in, deception or other espionage-related acts.

As part of an effort to improve cultural recognition of facelessness, Clark allowed their visage to be used as the basis for a line of vegetable-themed children's toys which are similarly featureless and can be decorated with plastic facial features. Clark donates all proceeds from the use of their likeness to a school for faceless children.

This has not shielded Clark from some controversy, however, as rumor has it that their condition has led them to engage in what some consider unsplortsmanlike behavior—"losing" eyes and ears in opposing teams' dugouts, for example, as well as changing face parts on the field in order to impersonate other players.

Rival teams may apply the term "unsplortsmanlike" to Clark's behavior, but their teammates insist the reality is quite different. Clark is known as the team prankster, frequently surprising visitors and guests with questions such as "Do I have something in my teeth?" before presenting their blank face to see how guests respond. Clark typically follows this goof up with a good-natured tweak of the other person's nose and a wink. Though they do not have visible eyes, everyone who has experienced this exchange knows with utter certainty that Clark winked.

Another of Clark's favorite jokes is to produce a perfect replica of a person's nose and exclaim, "Got your nose!" Though Clark claims this is all in good fun, it has led to some suspicion. No one knows who is supplying Clark with molded plastic face parts that bear an eerie resemblance to prominent players in the League. It could be that Clark themself is getting close enough to these players in order to cast themself molds of their faces, although since other teams find Clark's quirk mildly disturbing, the lengths that Clark would need to go to attempt such a feat would be highly illegal. It could be that they have a supplier, a very powerful one at that, and Clark could somehow provide a very high price for such artifacts. The league does not know the truth, and at press time, Clark has absolutely no intention of letting them find out.

Becoming a Fire Eater and later incinerations

Clark became one of the first players in the ILB to become a Fire Eater during the Season β9 elections. Despite not usually having a mouth, Clark has been seen to be able to use these abilities nonetheless, and multiple videos exist of them seemingly swallowing fire in the place where a mouth would be. Clark initially reacted positively to the change, claiming in interviews soon after that the presence of Fire Eaters was “one of the only decent things to come out of an election in...well, ever.” They punctuated this by taking a mouth out of their pocket, placing it on their face, and licking their lips. Clark generally became known as one of the few players on the otherwise reserved Spies consistently willing to be reached for comment, and often spoke positively about their abilities and the possibility of preventing future incinerations with it.

During Season β13, the Spies experienced their first two incinerations since Season β3, with the deaths of longtime Spy Theodore Holloway and Holloway’s replacement, Norris Firestar. Notably, Clark became Magmatic during the game in which Holloway was incinerated, but did not hit a home run to lose this status until the next day. Footage of the Spies shortly after the game’s end showed Clark visibly shaking and unwell due to this, and this image was frequently used as a substitute for footage of the incineration itself by news outlets.

Beloved Spies batter Son Scotch died soon afterwards, during Season β14. Clark was initially thought to be a likely candidate to make public comment at fan memorials and other events for Scotch, but instead did not appear in the public eye until Season β15 began. Clark has to this date not commented on these events.

Late Expansion Era and Shadowing

Clark remained a steady presence on the Spies lineup the next nine seasons, becoming one of the few players remaining on the team since its ILB debut. They were known to have a positive relationship with their teammate Yrjö Kerfuffle before Kerfuffle’s alternation and removal to the Shadows, as the two of them were frequently seen playing cards and entertaining Kerfuffle’s adoptive child, Norris Firestar Jr., while waiting for their turn at-bat during games. Clark also developed a friendship with fellow Fire Eater Paula Mason after she joined the Spies, with Mason stating that “Clark’s great, but they worry too much about stuff that’s out of our hands. Makes you want to grab them and shake them by the shoulders a little bit sometimes. That and they keep putting fake noses in my burgers.”

As Season β23 approached, it was noted by multiple news outlets and fan groups that Clark was at the time one of the few players in the ILB to have been present for every one of their team’s games, having never left the Spies’ lineup or been swept Elsewhere. Though Clark was asked about this at multiple post-game press events, they were often perceived as “playing down” their accomplishment, at one point admitting their fifty years in the ILB had been “mostly tiring, really.” As Clark had not been the focus of much public attention since Scotch’s incineration, many commentators noted their personality seemed muted and humbled in comparison to older interviews, most speculating this was simply due to the passage of time.

However, videos later surfaced of Clark displaying what many saw as worrying behavior at previous Spies games, such as pacing quickly around the dugout and sitting quietly in An Undisclosed Location’s bleachers long after games had ended. Most of these videos were later erased from the internet due to copyright strikes from unspecified parties. Some noted that these videos often appeared to take place soon after new entries in the ILB’s official Library appeared detailing the Firewalker modification and the possibility of team incinerations.

Clark did not comment on this publicly before their time in the Spies lineup came to an abrupt end, as they were sent to the Shadows by Voicemail on Season 23, Day 46. Soon after, documents began appearing in many major Houston establishments as well as in An Undisclosed Location detailing safety mechanisms fans could use to escape potential injury or other dangers in the event of witnessing a team incineration or the potential implosion of Sun(Sun). The Spies have denied Clark’s involvement in these documents, but many have noted that images in these documents frequently include people who are faceless.

Theories

  • Theory: Some wealthy benefactor is providing Clark with plastic face parts.
    • Evidence: These face parts are expertly designed and it would take great resources, access, and subtlety to accomplish these casts.
      • Counterevidence: Nonsense. Surely if someone were dumping that much money into the Spies, they'd win more often.
        • Counter-counterevidence: Spies win.
  • Countertheory: Clark makes the face parts themself and is too shy to take credit for their good work.
    • Evidence: The pieces fit extremely well and nobody else is ever seen with them. Also, again, if someone were dumping that much money into the Spies they'd surely win more blessings.
    • Counterevidence against countertheory: Clark is not shy.
      • Counter-counterevidence against countertheory: "Humble about their accomplishments" and "outgoing" are not mutually exclusive. Also, Reese is cool.
        • Counter-counter-counterevidence against countertheory: Reese, you can't comment on your own page. We can see your IP address.

Fan Works