New York Millennials
- "Millennials" redirects here. For other uses, see Millennials (disambiguation).
The New York Millennials are a Blaseball team in the Mild High division of the Mild League. They have been a part of Internet League Blaseball since Season AA. For Seasons 1-5 of the ILB, they played in the Chaotic Good division of the Good League. For Season 6-8, they played in the Wild High division of the Wild League. Since Season 9, they have played in the Mild High division of the Mild League. They have been a part of Internet League Blaseball since Season β1, and claim to be "the gayest team in blaseball".
Select Tlopps Blaseball Cards can be found here.
- Scrap Murphy (Season 2, Day 40; replaced by Felix Garbage)
- Chorby Soul (Season 3, Day 14; replaced by Sandie Turner)
- Wesley Dudley (Season 7, Day 24; replaced by Nandy Fantastic)
- Dominic Marijuana (Season 7, Day 59; replaced by Charlatan Seabright)
- Chorby Soul (Season 16, Day 88; replaced by Mikan Hammer)
- Winnie Mccall (Season 16, Day 92; replaced by Anathema Elemefayo)
- Alyssa Harrell (Season 4, Day 15; replaced by Penelope Mathews)
- Richardson Games (Season 4, Day 83; replaced by Ren Hunter)
- Conrad Vaughan (Season 6, Day 22; replaced by Valentine Games)
- Valentine Games (Season 6, Day 51; replaced by Andrew Solis)
- Bates Bentley (Season 12, Day 50; replaced by NaN)
- Fynn Doyle (Season 17, Day 15; replaced by Sandie Carver)
- Mclaughlin Scorpler (Post-season 3, to Hades Tigers)
- NaN (To the Chicago Firefighters, Season β13 elections, replaced by Peanut Holloway)
- Alejandro Leaf (To the Tokyo Lift, Season β13 elections, no replacement)
- Mags Banananana (To the Mexico City Wild Wings, Season β14 elections, replaced by Mullen Peterson)
- Schneider Bendie (To the Boston Flowers, Season β14 elections, replaced by Glabe Moon)
- Penelope Mathews (To the Seattle Garages, Season β15 elections, replaced by Chorby Soul)
- Uncle Plasma (To the Kansas City Breath Mints, Season β15 elections, replaced by Oscar Vaughan)
- Mikan Hammer (To the Breckenridge Jazz Hands, Season β16 elections, replaced by Conrad Vaughan)
- Felix Garbage (To the LA Unlimited Tacos, Season β16 elections, replaced by Greer Gwiffin)
- Glabe Moon (To the Boston Flowers, Season β16 elections, replaced by Schneider Bendie)
- Chorby Short (To the Boston Flowers, Season β17 elections, replaced by Castillo Turner)
- Andrew Solis (To the Ohio Worms, Season β18 elections, replaced by Kichiro Guerra)
- Kichiro Guerra (To the Ohio Worms, Season β20 elections, replaced by Andrew Solis)
- Castillo Turner (To the Boston Flowers, Season β20 elections, replaced by Chorby Short)
- Chorby Short (To the Boston Flowers, Season β21 elections, replaced by Castillo Turner)
- Hatfield Suzuki (To the Hades Tigers, Season β21 elections, no replacement)
- Castillo Turner (To the Hawai'i Fridays, Season β22 elections, replaced by Beck Whitney)
- Ezekiel Throckmorton (To the Seattle Garages, Season β22 elections, no replacement)
- Ramirez Winters (To the LA Unlimited Tacos, Season β23 elections, no replacement)
Echoed into Static
- Wyatt Mason IX (Season β14, Day 77)
- Peanut Holloway (Season β15, Day 15)
- Ren Hunter (Season β15, Day 15)
- Agan Espinoza (Season β24, Day 11)
Faded to Dust
- Chorby Soul IV (Season β18 elections)
- Uncle Plasma II (Season β21 elections)
- Clare Ballard II (Season β22 elections)
Phantom Thieves' Guild Heists
- Erickson Fischer (Season β22, Day 113, stolen by Worldwide Field Thieves' Guild)
- Jake Swinger (Season β24, Day 3, stolen by The Cookout Thieves' Guild)
- Munro Tumblehome (Season β24, Day 13, stolen by Yellowstone Thieves' Guild)
- Jacobus Harper (Season β24, Day 20, stolen by The Meadow Thieves' Guild)
- Fenry Stickybeak (Season β24, Day 44, stolen by The Choux Thieves' Guild)
For more detailed recaps of the Millennials' seasons, see New York Millennials/History.
|Season||Record||Wins||Division Rank||Subleague Rank||Postseason|
|1||46-53||46||5th||8th||Did not qualify|
|2||44-55||44||5th||8th||Did not qualify|
|3||65-34||65||1st||1st||Division Series: Won 3-1 over the Dallas Steaks|
Championship Series: Won 3-1 over the San Francisco Lovers
Internet Series: Lost 3-2 to the Hades Tigers
|4||58-41||58||1st||2nd||Division Series: Won 3-1 over the Dallas Steaks|
Championship Series: Won 3-2 over the Chicago Firefighters
Internet Series: Lost 3-0 to the Hades Tigers
|5||64-35||64||1st||2nd||Division Series: Lost 3-1 to the Chicago Firefighters|
|6||51-48||51||4th||5th||Did not qualify|
|7||55-44||55||4th||4th||Division Series: Lost 3-0 to the Baltimore Crabs|
|8||50-49||50||2nd||5th||Did not qualify|
|9||44-55||44||5th||8th||Did not qualify|
|10||47-52||47||4th||7th||Chosen as Mild League Wild Card entrant.|
Wildcard Round: Won 2-0 over the Philly Pies
Division Series: Won 3-1 over the Canada Moist Talkers
Championship Series: Lost 3-0 to the Charleston Shoe Thieves
|11||40-57||40||4th||9th||Did not qualify|
|12||55-44||55||3rd||4th||Wildcard Round: Lost 2-1 to the Charleston Shoe Thieves|
|13||53-46||56||1st||4th||Wildcard Round: Lost 2-1 to the Kansas City Breath Mints|
|14||49-50||49||4th||7th||Did not qualify|
|15||63-36||63||1st||3rd||Division Series: Lost 3-1 to the Canada Moist Talkers|
|16||23-76||22||6th||12th||Did not qualify|
|17||38-61||38||4th||10th||Chosen as Mild League Wild Card entrant.
Wildcard Round: Lost 2-0 to the Hawai'i Fridays
|18||31-68||31||6th||12th||Did not qualify|
|19||53-46||-53||5th||9th||Did not qualify|
|20||50-49||52||3rd||6th||Did not qualify|
|21||61-38||67||3rd||5th||Chosen as Mild League Wild Card entrant to the Overbracket.
Wildcard Round: Won 2-1 over the Philly Pies
Division Series: Lost 3-0 to the Baltimore Crabs
|22||47-52||58||5th||8th||Qualified for the Underbracket after the Moist Talkers were selected as the Overbracket wild card.
Wildcard Round: Won 2-1 over the Seattle Garages
Division Series: Won 3-1 over the Yellowstone Magic
Championship Series: Won 4-3 over the Hawai'i Fridays
Internet Series: Lost 3-2 to Miami Dale
|23||58-41||67||2nd||4th||Wildcard Round: Won 2-1 over the San Francisco Lovers
Division Series: Lost 3-1 to the Canada Moist Talkers
|Season||Direct Outcomes||Indirect Election Effects|
|2||Won Soul Swap blessing (26% of the vote, highest bidder)
Stats were randomized for the team's five worst players: Theodore Cervantes, Fynn Doyle, Richardson Games, Winnie McCall, and Conrad Vaughan.
|The Fourth Strike decree applied Fourth Strike to NYM for Season 3.|
|3||No blessings won.
Highest bidder for Evil Wind Sprints (29%)
|Exile, won by the Hades Tigers, saw Mclaughlin Scorpler move to the Tigers in exchange for Alyssa Harrell.|
|4||No blessings won.
Highest bidder for Evil Wind Sprints (46%)
|The Targeted Shame decree applied Targeted Shame to NYM for Season 5.|
The Alternate Reality decree replaced Wesley Dudley and Fynn Doyle with Alternates.
The Getting In Their Heads (Literally) blessing, won by the Boston Flowers, impaired the NYM maximum vibes by 7%.
|5||No blessings won.
Highest bidder on Mutual Aid blessing (22% of the vote)
|6||Won Ooze (3%)
Team power was boosted by 10%.
Won The Best Defense (36%, highest bidder)
The best hitting pitcher, Bates Bentley, and the worst hitter, Penelope Mathews, swapped positions.
Highest bidder for Collect Call (25%)
|7||Won Hot Sauce Packet (2%)
Sandie Turner became Spicy.
Highest bidder for The Iffey Jr. (56%)
|The Shame Bubble blessing, won by the Hawai'i Fridays, was applied to NYM for Season 8.|
|8||No blessings won.
Highest bidder for Subleague Swap (38%)
|The Subleague Swap blessing, won by the Mexico City Wild Wings, moved NYM to the Mild High division.|
|9||No blessings won.
Highest bidder for Grab and Smash (42%)
|The Fifth Base Bubble blessing, won by the Baltimore Crabs, applied Fifth Base to NYM for Season 10.|
The Hot Sauce Bar blessing, won by the Seattle Garages, applied Spicy to Charlatan Seabright.
The Shame Bubble blessing, won by the Boston Flowers, applied Targeted Shame to NYM for Season 10.
|10||Won An Actual Airplane (1%)
Thomas Dracaena gained An Actual Airplane.
Won Bird Seed (20%)
The Millennials have gained Bird Seed.
Highest bidder for People's Champions (13%)
|The Shelled One's Pods have fallen back to the plane. Alejandro Leaf fell to the Millennials.|
|11||Won VI The Lover (1%)
The Millennials receive VI The Lover.
Mags Banananana wandered to the Millennials.
|The Boston Flowers targeted Schneider Bendie for an exchange, opting to send back Glabe Moon. (3%/0%/0%)|
The Min-Maxing blessing, won by the Seattle Garages, applied Maximalist to Thomas Dracaena and Minimalist to Nandy Fantastic.
|The Kansas City Breath Mints targeted Uncle Plasma for a foreshadow (votes cast while Plasma was investigating), opting to send back Oscar Vaughan. (48%/93%/45%)|
|The LA Unlimited Tacos targeted Felix Garbage for an equivalent exchange, opting to send back Greer Gwiffin. (39%/91%/36%)
The Boston Flowers targeted Glabe Moon for an equivalent exchange, opting to send back Schneider Bendie. (32%/7%/2%)
The Trust Fall decree gave the Battin' Island Turntables. The Ratification decree removed the Turntables and Hotel Motel from Battin' Island.
|The Boston Flowers targeted Castillo Turner for an equivalent exchange, trading Chorby Short.|
|The Hades Tigers won the Double Negative blessing, recruiting Hatfield Suzuki from the Millennials.
|The Hawai'i Fridays won the Subtractor Avoidance blessing, giving Nandy Fantastic the Subtractor mod.
||The LA Unlimited Tacos won the Season 22: Gachapon blessing, recruiting Ramirez Winters from the Millennials' Shadows.|
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.
After Basethirst's failed launch attempt and mysterious reappearance on shelves, a sponsorship deal was announced on the Millennials twitter account, with Dominic Marijuana acting as the face of the brand. Both the Ceaseless Thirst Corporation and the ownership of the Millennials have refused to comment on whether players other than Marijuana are being paid for the sponsorship, leading to widespread criticism and light rioting from the anti-capitalist wings of the fan base. Dominic avoided backlash from fans and fellow players when it was revealed that his sponsorship money was being used to help Blaseball stadium janitors try out for the New York Blittle League team.
In response to the Basethirst sponsorship, The Millennials Players Union are officially partnered with the Plabst Blue Ribbon Workers' Union.
- Social Media Manager: NYSMM
- Mascot: Millie the Bodega Cat
- Club Historian: Andrew Playmer
- An immediate and lasting cross-team friendship was forged with the Hellmouth Sunbeams during the Season β10 Wild Card Round. Both teams were selected as Wild Card representatives, and swept their opposition in parallel to the delight of their combined fanbases. Since then, the teams have become very close, bonding over their love of Blaseball and the Marijuana Brothers, Randall Marijuana and Dominic Marijuana.
- The fans thrive in the chaos they collectively create, creating new long acronyms (including LGMASBLDMASDMASADWCBLDWC, “Let’s Go Mills And Sunbeams Baby Love Da Mills And Sunbeams Da Mills And Sunbeams Are Da Wild Cards Baby Love Da Wild Cards”) and mashups of team chants such as "WHOSE BONES? NOT OURS WE RENT!" and "STARE INTO THE HOUSE! THE RENT STARES BACK!".
- Following Season 10, the teams signed a lease together and are now long-distance roommates.
- Upon the arrival of the Core Mechanics in the Internet League, the Millennials gladly welcomed the new team into Mild High in the spirit of friendly competition. However, when Season 16 dawned, the Mechanics and Millennials suddenly found themselves in a different kind of competition: warring propaganda campaigns for AAA Blood. The Millennials claimed that they needed the Power Chaaarge to charge their phones, and also because they were so very angry and also sad and needed to do a lot of screaming. The Mechanics claimed that they needed the Power Chaaarge to charge their numerous machines and robots down in the Core. In the end, the Steaks won it. Same as it ever was.
- We don't talk about Season 17.
- At any rate, when the dust cleared, the Mechanics and the Millennials had a flourishing rivalry, supported by their mutual loves of technology and Battin' Island floating in defiance of all known laws of Down. Mechanics fans have been known to offer repair work to The Apartment's many appliances, and there has been discussion of adding a subway line to the Core, with Millie the Bodega Cat's blessing. This is all, obviously, in the spirit of rivalry, according to the definition the Hellmouth Sunbeams had helpfully explained.
For more on the Millennialls' mascots, see New York Millennials/Fan Culture.
- "LET'S GO MILLS BABY LOVE DA MILLS" (LGMBLDM)
- "ALWAYS BET DA MILLS BLABY" (ABDMB)
- Call: "WHOSE HOUSE?"
- Response: "NOT OURS WE RENT"
- "[name/pronoun]'S WALKIN' HERE" (after a walk)
- "BAN GROUND" (after a ground out)
- "IT'S LIT" (bases loaded)
- "FLY THE AVO" (after a win)
- Player-Specific Chants:
- Thomas Dracaena
- "DRAC ATTACK"
- Sandie Turner
- "SANDIE TURNER IS RED HOT"
- "TURN IT UP SANDIE"
- Hatfield Suzuki
- "HATS UP HATS OFF"
- "HAT TRICK"
- "HATCATCH" (when Hatfield catches a ball)
- Anathema Elemefayo
- "damn. LMFAO" (when Ana strikes out)
- Nandy Fantastic
- "FANTASTIC NANDY"
- Schneider Bendie
- "F**K CAPITALISM, STEAL HOME"
- "BEND IT LIKE BENDIE"
- Mullen Peterson
- "MOAT" (Mullen Of All Trades)
- "MULL IT OVER"
- Theodore Cervantes
- "GET CERVED"
- "TERMINAL VELOCITY"
- Patty Fox
- "CHOP CHOP"
- Dominic Marijuana
- "BLAZE IT DOM"
- "DOM ONE-HITTER" (after a solo home run)
- Winnie Mccall
- "WIN IT WINNIE"
- Ren Hunter
- "REN IS DUE"
- "LGNaNBLDNaN" (Let's Go NaN Baby Love Da NaN)
- "NaN Catch!" (when NaN catches a ball)
- "NaN SLAM" (when NaN hits a grand slam)
- Chorby Soul/Chorby Short
- "Chorby [Interjection]"
- "Chorby YES!"
- "Chorby NO!"
- "Chorby THANKS!"
- "Chorby [Interjection]"
- Bates Bentley
- "CLOSE THE BATES"
- Penelope Mathews
- "LUCKY PENNY"
- Fynn Doyle
- "FYNNISH THEM"
- Felix Garbage
- "GARBAGE DAY"
- Alejandro Leaf
- "I/WE GOTTA BELEAF"
- Uncle Plasma
- "UNCLE MODE"
- Andrew Solis
- "Andy do a kickflip!"
- Thomas Dracaena
For more Millennialls' fan art, see New York Millennials/Fan Art.
Logo by Cobaltcakes
"The Mills" New York Millennials lettering by @andreastreeter
Millennials Alt Logo by @OrigamiAndroid
|Beta||1 · 2 · 3 · 4· 5· 6· 7· 8· 9· 10· 11· 12· 13· 14· 15· 16· 17· 18· 19· 20· 21· 22· 23· 24|
|Circuits||Gamma 1 · Gamma 2 · Gamma 3 · Gamma 4|
|Ballpark||New York, New York Arena, Arena|
|Staff||Millie the Bodega Cat · NYSMM|
|Places||New York · The Apartment|
|History||New York Millennials' History · Millennials (generation)|
|Fan Culture 📣 · Fan Works 💌 · Tlopps Cards 🃏|
|Youth Will Save Us|