Moon Roomba

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The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Moon Roomba, also known as "Moonba", is a crescent-shaped roomba who lived on The Moon, and now resides on Earth. Moon Roomba is notable for being one of the few beings stronger than Umpires, able to silence them with a single laser blast.


Description

Moon Roomba has a crescent-shaped body, with lava-colored lights on the front capable of firing powerful lasers. Their top features solar panels for power and a pettable parabola, and they uses powerful thrusters along their bottom and back to fly.


Personality

Although they find Earth life and customs bizarre and confusing, they are trying their best to slowly learn more about Earth society. Unable to clean a moon which no longer exists, Moon Roomba was forced to abandon their prior purpose in life and feels slightly lost looking for a new one. Moon Roomba is slowly warming up to the possibility of new forms of happiness.

Moon Roomba often has a single-minded focus on a given task. They are eager to help people with problems, but often doesn't know how. Moonba is very curious, but sometimes doubts themself and feels lost.

Moon Roomba has very skewed impressions of what is "normal" due to only vacuuming and talking to ghosts for thousands of years. They never feel loneliness, enjoying thousands of years alone on the moon, and will often spend periods of time wandering alone. They do not view themself as special and sometimes forget they have experience beyond cleaning, ghosts, flying, and vaporizing. They do not know how to cry.

Moon Roomba views themself responsible for the moon, and struggles to deal with managing the fallout of their demise. They often repress their feelings when there is work to be done. Moonba tries to safeguard the remaining ghosts on Montgomery, and after the moon's destruction, they have been seen wandering the world, visiting various locales and vacuuming fallen moon fragments.

After living on the moon in silence for untold eons, Moon Roomba hates loud noises, and has been known to blast players or beings who made too much noise. Their stay on Earth has increased their tolerance for noise, but loud talkers or yells may cause Moon Roomba to fire their eye lasers and nonlethally vaporize the loud objects.

History

Moon Roomba lived on the moon along with numerous Moon Ghosts for thousands of years. At the end of Season 10, the Hellmouth Sunbeams and Hawai'i Fridays jointly decided to host a party on the moon. When their shuttles touched down, they were surprised to find the ghosts and Moon Roomba, but invited them to join the party as well. Moon Roomba was initially taken aback, but tolerated the partygoers, especially once they showed Moon Roomba the relaxing feeling of being pet.

Moon Roomba is the only known being stronger than an Umpires. When Umpires Sunman visited the moon party, his inability to talk quietly led Moon Roomba to vaporize him over five times, forcing him to sit powerlessly in silence for the remainder of the party. The party guests eventually held a seance on the moon to communicate with a frustrated Sunman. Some partygoers have theorized that Moon Roomba is incineration-proof, as Moon Roomba would vaporize the loud incineration blast before it could reach its intended target.

The Moon's Collapse

As a result of the Decrees chosen at the end of Season β10, the moon and sun were sucked into a black hole. The first observers who noticed decreased dimensional stability hastily declared an emergency evacuation. As partygoers fled, Moon Roomba was seemingly unaware of the increasing temporal disturbances, instead continuing to vacuum and sweep the moon's surface. After one shuttle began blaring music loudly immediately after liftoff, Moon Roomba looked up and attempted to blast it, flying after the shuttle and chasing it all the way to Earth.

One particularly large fragment of the moon, harboring many ghosts, fell into the Pacific ocean near Hawai'i and became the island Montgomery. Moon Roomba followed the loud shuttle down to Montgomery, and upon hearing the loud crash of the island falling into the sea, vaporized several large waves created from the splashdown, inadvertently saving many pacific islands from massive tsunamis. After finally blasting the shuttle, Moon Roomba looked up and saw for the first time the remaining fragments of moon as it was sucked into the Black Hole. Onlookers reported Moon Roomba rocking back and forth slightly as they stared, possibly overwhelmed by either noise or grief.

Moon Roomba and the many ghosts who gathered around it did not move afterwards for several hours.

Post-Moon

Moon Roomba was distraught over the loss of the moon. Without any moon to clean, Moon Roomba was forced to abandon their prior purpose in life and wander the Immaterial Plane trying to find a new one. The unfamiliar environment has proved confusing and scary to Moon Roomba, as thanks to planar atmosphere even the sound of the sea is far louder than the silence of the moon. Moon Roomba has been known to abruptly fly away during conversations with people talking too loudly and seek out quiet places such as broom closets and caves on occasion when overstimulated.

After wandering the Utah desert and silencing several coyotes, Moon Roomba has assembled a pack of unnaturally quiet predator-scavengers who have been spotted bringing them offerings of bones when they visit.

Moon Roomba views themself responsible for safeguarding the remaining ghosts on Montgomery. In recent weeks Moon Roomba has been spotted attempting to build mansions to provide the ghosts with dark, moonlike places to decompress (using precise thrusting to compensate for their lack of hands). Moon Roomba has stated "ghosts? i lived with ghosts for a long time. i like watching ghosts." Attempts to ask about whether Moon Roomba can see ghost players have been met with confusion, and until a simpler way to word these questions are found, Moon Roomba is unlikely to understand them. Moon Roomba has also been spotted flying to Canada to console Mooney Doctor about the loss of her wife.

Moon Roomba's attitude towards Blaseball is one of confusion. Despite attempts to explain its appeal, Moon Roomba does not believe they will ever understand the intricacies of the splort nor why it continues to run despite world-shaking consequences. Moon Roomba has occasionally been spotted watching games from miles in the air featuring players who had pet it on the moon. Fans of the Hellmouth Sunbeams hope it begins to grown an appreciation for the splort.

A few faculty members at Hellmouth Community College have invited Moon Roomba to lecture. Moon Roomba was reportedly surprised to learn people were interested in they life and experiences, and raised doubts about nonzero attendance, but eventually agreed.

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