Freemium Seraph

Freemium Seraph
art by @MaybeAMako
Basic Information
Team	Canada Moist Talkers
Former Team(s)	Tokyo Lift
Status	Incinerated
Batting	(3.5)
Pitching	(2.6)
Defense	(3.2)
Running	(3.7)
Modifications	FlippersWhen immateria floods, this Runner will score instead of being cleared from the Bases.
Items	Ambitious Helmet ●○
Dates Active	Oct 18, 2020–present
External Links	Blaseball-Reference Player Changes Player Page
Personal Information
Evolution	Base
Peanut Allergy	Not Allergic
Pregame Ritual	Strength training
Coffee Style	Plenty of Sugar
Blood Type	Grass
Fate	84
Biographical Details
Pronouns	It/Its or They/Them
Nickname(s)	Sera
Jersey Number	121

Freemium Seraph is a player in the Shadows for the Canada Moist Talkers, and has been with the team since the Season β21 elections. Seraph has played for the Tokyo Lift.

Official League Records

Seraph joined the ILB as a lineup player for the Tokyo Lift during the Season β10 elections after the Ascension of the Baltimore Crabs.

During the Season β13 elections, Seraph received the Flippers modification as a result of the Spare Flippers blessing.

During the Season β14 elections, Seraph's hitting stats were re-rolled thrice as a result of the Soul Swap blessing. (1.9 → 1.6 , 1.6 → 2.5 , 2.5 → 2.9 )

Seraph was traded to the Canada Moist Talkers in exchange for Cudi Di Batterino during the Season β21 elections via the Lift's Equivalent Exchange will, becoming a pitcher in the process.

On Season β22, Day 25, Seraph retreated to the Moist Talkers' Shadows in exchange for Beasley Gloom as a result of the Gleek Arena's Fax Machine.

COMMUNITY REPORTS
The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.

Box of Freemium Seraph Files

Dust billows as the file box lands on the table. While many archives in the Interdimensional Rumor Mill are unified in some way, this... definitely isn’t one of them. The accompanying Rumor Registry explains all of the contents... wherever it is... but for now you grab the folder labelled IF-99.791 and start reading...

Physical Form

The being known as Freemium Seraph is a robotic quasi-humanoid theorized to have some connections, or possibly origin, relating to the moon. They are approximately 2.4 meters (7’10”) when standing naturally, but their hunched back and lower body posture suggests their full height is likely significantly taller. Retractable wings branching from their arms allow limited flight.

Freemium Seraph, a batter for the Tokyo Lift’s original lineup beginning in Season β11, is a being of unclear origin. Seraph takes the form of a quasi-humanoid robotic figure, though certain features- such as digitigrade legs, minimal facial features, and spire-mounted webbing stretching from the back of its head and continuing down its upper back- give the entity a strange and alien appearance.

Coupled with the entity standing at approximately 2.4 meters tall when standing normally (though the entity’s hunched spinal posture and legs bent at the knee and ankle suggest that it would be much taller at full height), many who encounter Seraph up close find it difficult to strike conversation, as the entity - often unexpectedly - causes momentary paralysis and fear in humans that was described as ‘‘lingering… [as an] unsettling sense of being watched by something you must not displease... at all costs” in an interview with an anonymous fan of the Tokyo Lift team. It is hypothesized that beings differing significantly enough from human physiology and psychology would not be affected by this phenomenon; studies are ongoing, but have yet to produce conclusive evidence supporting or refuting this theory.

Anomalies

Apart from its as of yet unexplained unsettling presence and the strangely lightweight yet durable metal that makes up its armor and the majority of its visible components and exoskeletal structures, a few key curiosities exist: most notably, two major mechanical aspects of the entity have raised many questions among fans and teammates alike.

The first is its wings: Seraph possesses large, multi-sectioned wings that render it capable of gliding and limited flight as assisted by its impossibly lightweight body and nimble body structure seemingly designed to allow it to launch itself into the air to initiate flight. These wings, which stem from the undersides of its arms, are capable of folding and retracting into the small space available in the limbs themselves; their presence there does not seem to have any impact on the normal ambulation and function of Seraph’s arms.

Second, and equally strange, is Seraph’s reported awareness of the presence of a ‘minute central core’ composed of ‘an element not present in any table or record’ Seraph has found. The element has been tentatively referred to as ‘Freemium,’ and is suspected to hold the atomic number 121, but its function and purpose in Seraph’s function is entirely unclear.

Following this discovery, Seraph’s jersey number has changed to ‘121.’ It is unknown if Seraph made the change itself, or if it was made by a coach or teammate- either way, Seraph has not objected to nor commented on the change.

Origin

What little non-speculative information exists regarding Seraph’s nature and origins is from answers and explanations given by the entity itself. Seraph has stated that it is aware that a large portion of its memory has been lost- it uses the word ‘taken,’ but admits to uncertainty as to why this word seems most accurate to it- but that all memory that it has formed since its earliest memory has appeared ‘by human standards, perfect’ and ‘displays no signs of degradation or corruption,’ which may explain why it theorizes that its earlier memories were removed deliberately rather than having been naturally lost.

Seraph’s earliest reported memory suggests that they may have arrived on Earth by means of re-entry, though no visible signs of damage or wear from this ordeal have been identified. The underside of a piece of armor on the entity’s chest- which was removed to clear detritus from a small cluster of heat vents located on the front center of the chest- is marked with faint, worn lettering reconstructed by the entity to read [APO-L—1–7-], but Seraph reports no memory or knowledge of its meaning or significance. In terms of Seraph’s physical structure, much is still unknown. Small, mostly exterior mechanisms appear to have been replaced or reinforced with modern Earth technology- a fact that Seraph confirms- but it is unclear what could have caused sufficient damage or wear to the entity to cause it to need to make these additions or replacements. Seraph has yet to respond to questions on the subject.

Furthermore, Seraph has never allowed any other than itself to attempt repair or even observation of any systems and mechanisms involved in its function beyond those visible on its exterior. It reports having repaired and synthesized replacement components for several systems during its time on Earth, but as no witnessed hazard has yet been seen to cause any damage to Seraph’s exterior, it is similarly unclear why these repairs were necessary.

Outside Sources

Another member of the Tokyo Lift team, Concrete Mandible, reports their first memory being of awakening in an unknown location with Seraph present, seemingly having found them earlier that day. Seemingly unaffected by Seraph’s unnerving presence, Concrete has been a companion to the entity for much of its time on Earth, and seems to be one of very few individuals able to read Seraph’s extremely subtle body language and emotional state.

Concrete reports that “the most… visceral emotion [they] ever saw from [Seraph] was… when the moon was [swallowed]... and everyone else just thought [Seraph] was- just watching, like anyone else, like [Seraph] always [does].” This may suggest an emotional connection between Seraph and the moon- however, since its disappearance into the event horizon of the black hole, Seraph has not responded to questions on the topic, and Concrete reports that they “[aren’t] a spy.”

Tokyo

Following the loss of the moon, Seraph joined the Tokyo Lift. It may have been invited by Mandible, or may have joined the team of its own free will. Seraph never verbally expressed discomfort with the weather of Season 11, but its teammates appeared to be aware of its unhappiness about both Sun 2 and Black Hole.

Seraph remained a constant and imposing presence on the Lift, appearing outwardly unchanged by the addition of both Flippers and a new soul. Its teammates began to speak of it as they would speak of a friend. Seraph continued not to speak of its teammates. This arrangement appeared to satisfy all parties.

Canada

Neither the Lift nor the Canada Moist Talkers can confidently say what inspired Seraph to transfer from the former team to the latter. Following only a handful of games with the Moist Talkers, Seraph retreated to the team’s Shadows, which also housed Mooney Doctor. Fans have speculated that Seraph wanted to meet Doctor; others, that it already knew her; others, still, that it was a mere coincidence.

Seraph has been relatively hidden from the public eye following its exit into the Shadows. This is likely intentional.

Trivia

• Seraph has only four fingers on each hand.
• Despite appearing to be entirely mechanical, Seraph gives off a heat signature similar to a living, organic being.
• Seraph, as an entity, is of unclear age, and speculation on the matter does little good. It is suspected that the entity has taken various forms over the course of its existence, and may even be credited with the strange coherence and consistency of imagery related to Seraphim during the byzantine and renaissance eras.

Fan Works

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  by @starfauna

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  Player card by @MaybeAMako

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  by @MaybeAMako

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  by @MaybeAMako

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  by @MaybeAMako

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  by @MaybeAMako

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  Freemium Seraph Action Buddy Lift Merch by Edspear

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  Art by @unhenge

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