Blaseball
Blaseball is a splort. You can participate in the cultural event of Blaseball at Blaseball.com.
Blaseball was made known to us at the beginning of Season 1, however it is uncertain how long it has existed. Some experts speculate blaseball has always existed, half-formed in the corner of our collective vision; while others philosophize that blaseball was synthesized via humanity's darkest hour expressly to absolve us from the sins of mortal hubris by way of intrumentalizing further hubris.
All scholars agree, however, that The Commissioner is doing a great job!
Structure
Blaseball is played between two Teams, across two Leagues and follows rules similar to the ancient sport of ██████, which was outlawed in the year ██.
The splort consists of a Season, itself composed of 99 matches across five days ("Monday" to "Friday"). Matches occur every "hour" between two teams, and the team with the higher score is declared the winner, following ancient and arcane rituals involving blalls and blases.
Each team has a total Win-Loss ratio and, at the end of the Season, the four best Teams from each league move on to the postseason, which occurs every "Saturday." This is a best-of-five match series between the 8 Teams. This concludes with the Season's championship Internet Series, when finally one Team is declared the champion.
On "Sunday," known to some as The Slabbath, no splorts shall take place. Instead, the results of the Election are revealed and the events of the next Season are set in motion.
Participation
Fans of blaseball ("participants") can bet Blaseball coins on whom they believe will win, during a short betting period preceding every match. If the selected team wins that match, the participant will earn back double their initial bet, plus potentially more if the selected team has an especially low probability of victory.
Coins are collected for many reasons, such as greed; however, most participants eventually spend these coins at the Shop to purchase beneficial items to fuel their gambling, or to purchase vote tickets. Coins do roll over from season to season.
Elections
Every Season, participants are given the opportunity to spend their vote tickets on a pre-determined ballot of Decrees and Blessings. At the end of the Season, the votes are tallied and the highest voted changes are enacted, representing major changes to the game with effects that continue into the next Season and beyond. This interaction makes Blaseball the most democratic splort in existence.[citation needed]
Decrees
See the main article on Decrees.
Decrees are significant changes to the state of the game or to the rules itself. Decrees are voted on collectively; meaning all participants from all teams will influence and will be affected by the Season's decree.
Examples of known decrees include Open the Forbidden Book, an event that gave Blaseball access to the Forbidden Book and started us on a downward spiral ever since, or Peanuts, an event that also gave Blaseball access to Peanuts and also started us on a downward spiral ever since.
While it is possible that all decrees are equally doomed, judging by these examples, it is also equally likely that participants tend to vote for the most doomed option.
Blessings
See the main article on Blessings.
Blessings are significant changes to individual players on individual teams. Blessings are awarded on a lottery; meaning that the participants voting on a particular blessing on behalf of their team means that their team is more likely, but not guaranteed, to be awarded said blessing.
Examples of known blessings include Performance Enhancing Demons, which improves the team's overall performance, or Gunblade Bat, in which a random hitter on the team permanently gains a very powerful gunblade bat that maxes out their hitting stats.
The Book of Blaseball
See the main article on The Book of Blaseball.
The Book of Blaseball is the Official Rulebook of Blaseball. The Game of ████████████ and ██████████.
The book contains the following chapters, with each chapter containing a number of rules pertaining to blaseball. Much of the book remains redacted, and can be examined by all registered participants at this location.
- Seasons
- Postseasons
- Elections
- Playing the Game
- █████ and You
- ████████
Recent History
See the category page on History for all articles pertaining to historical events.
In recent history, Blaseball has been actively conducted, executed, and played for a number of seasons, beginning with the inaugural season and spiraling into even worse consequences as time inevitably marches on. Experts predict that the splort has "begun its perpetual motion towards a horizon that we may not live to see," and that blaseball will outlive you, the reader, in particular.
Seasons
One Season is composed of 99 matches per team across five days ("Monday" to "Friday").
The word "season" usually refers to not only the regular season of matches, but also the Internet Series, or postseason championship tournament; plus any other events that occur within Blaseball before the next season formally begins (for example, the immediate aftermath of election results).
A summary of each Season's events can be found on their respective articles.
| Season | Title(s) | Champion | Recorded
Incinerations |
|---|---|---|---|
| Season 1 | The Return | Philly Pies | 0 |
| Season 2 | The Discipline Era | Philly Pies | 17 |
| Season 3 | The Discipline Era: |
Hades Tigers | 27 |
| Season 4 | The Discipline Era: Feedback | Hades Tigers | 7 |
| Season 5 | The Discipline Era: Reverb | Chicago Firefighters | 2 |
| Season 6 | The Discipline Era: Idols | Baltimore Crabs | 4 |
| Season 7 | The Discipline Era: Getting Shelled | Mexico City Wild Wings | 14 |
| Season 8 | The Discipline Era: Rest In Violence | Baltimore Crabs | 3* |
| Season 9 | The Discipline Era: Forecast | Charleston Shoe Thieves | 1 |
| Season 10 | The Discipline Era: Backdraft | Baltimore Crabs | TBD |
| Season 11 | PEACE & PROSPERITY | Hellmouth Sunbeams | TBD |
*On the Day 94 game between the Baltimore Crabs and Miami Dale, a Rogue Umpire attempted to incinerate Beck Whitney. However, in the previous season's elections, Raúl Leal received the Iffey Jr., which came with the modification Fire Protector, protecting the whole team from incinerations. As such, the attempted incineration backfired on the Rogue Umpire, incinerating them instead.
