Beasley Gloom

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Revision as of 21:01, 26 May 2021 by Vampbat (talk | contribs) (OLR standardization + fixed dates active)

Beasley Gloom is a pitcher for the Canada Moist Talkers, and has been with the team since Season 9, Day 64. Gloom has played for the Charleston Shoe Thieves.

Official League Records

Gloom joined the ILB as a pitcher for the Charleston Shoe Thieves with the Return of Blaseball.

On Season 3, Day 84, Gloom swallowed a peanut and had an allergic reaction, resulting in a combined 10.3 -> 5.9 stat decrease.

During the Season 5 elections, Gloom's pitching was randomized twice and increased from .4 -> 2.6 as a result of the Shoe Thieves' Soul Swap blessing.

On Season 6, Day 43, Gloom siphoned some of Mexico City Wild Wings lineup player Lawrence Horne's pitching ability in a game with Blooddrain weather, increasing their own from 2.6 -> 3.3

On Season 9, Day 64, Gloom was exchanged to the Canada Moist Talkers due to Feedback. Gloom was replaced by Jaylen Hotdogfingers.

On Season 17, Day 91, Gloom retreated to the Moist Talkers' Shadows in exchange for Amos Melon via Gleek Arena's Fax Machine.

On Season 18, Day 20, Gloom rejoined the Moist Talkers' active roster in exchange for Augusto Reddick via Gleek Arena's Fax Machine.


The remainder of this article contains lore created collaboratively by the Blaseball community.


He's just the most adorable dog you've ever seen play blaseball! Look at his wittle paws and shoes! We All Love Beasley! Gloom's human was Workman Gloom, who once batted for the Shoe Thieves and the Canada Moist Talkers.

Blaseball Career

Workman Gloom was bringing Beasley Gloom to practice one day when the coach demons of the Shoe Thieves mistook the canine Gloom for a player. He was immediately drafted into blaseball and given an adorably small uniform to match the rest of the team.

It is worth noting that as of time of writing, there is nothing in the rule book that says a dog can't play blaseball. There is also no explicit rule stating that a human being can play blaseball.

Sometime between Seasons 5 and 6, Gloom made the revolutionary discovery that he could simply hold his own leash and go on walks whenever he wanted, taking more frequent and longer walks. On one of these walks around Charleston, he discovered and enrolled in a local gym, taking up weight lifting as a side hobby. The increase in strength and muscle mass led to vastly improved performance over Season 6 and 7, with Gloom rapidly becoming the team's best pitcher, eclipsing even manager and veteran pitcher Cornelius Games. Gloom's new abilities and physical stature also drew commentary from blaseball media, with one journalist saying "that is without a doubt the most ripped dog I have ever seen."

Aside from their late owner, Gloom has formed close relationships with Esme Ramsey, former Shoe Thieves player Joe Voorhees, and fellow canid player Howell Franklin.

Gloom specializes in stealing any shoe that looks tasty.

Fan Art