Baltimore Crabs/Season 22

🦀 Baltimore Crabs
Season 22
Dates	June 28, 2021 – July 04, 2021
← Previous	Season 21
Next →	Season 23
Results
Postseason	Win 3-2 against 🥧 Lose 0-3 against 🍬
Overall Record	73-26
Wins	84
Divine Favor	5
Division	1st in Mild Low
League	1st in Mild League
ILB Placement	1st overall
Modifiers	CarcinizationWhen this Team activates the Black Hole, they will steal their opponent's best hitter for the remainder of the game.  UnholeyWhen this Team activates the Black Hole, a random Player on their opponent's Team will be impaired by 1%.  0Players with 0 will always swing at strikes while there are 0 Balls and 0 Strikes in the At Bat.
Renovations	Peanut MisterA Peanut Mister will occasionally cure a Player of their peanut allergy. Peanut Misters can also remove the Superallergic modification from players.  PsychoAcousticsIn Feedback or Reverb, PsychoAcoustics will occasionally Echo one of the Away Team's mods to the Home Team, for game-long use.  Secret BaseThe Secret Base is a hidden base beyond 2nd that allows a baserunner to hide between innings.  Flood PumpsFlood Pumps will prevent Flooding weather from making your Ballpark filthier.  Salmon CannonsSalmon Cannons have a chance of expelling pests from your Ballpark. Salmon Cannons can prevent Consumer attacks and send players on the away team Elsewhere.  SmithyThe Smithy will occasionally repair Items for Players playing in this Ballpark.  Event HorizonThe Event Horizon will prevent the first Black Hole activation in each game, converting the Overflow to Unruns for your opponent's next game.  BirdhousesBirdhouses invite Birds to come live in your Ballpark. Every time a foul ball is hit in a ballpark with Birdhouses, a bird will be added to the ballpark, reducing its eDensity.
Light Switch	OFF
League Info
Active Rules	Eat The RichAt the end of each Season, the Fans with the top 1% of Coins will have their funds redistributed throughout the 99%.  Party TimeA Team will enter Party Time if receiving 1 Win per remaining game would not land them in the Postseason. In Party Time, they'll receive random Stat Boosts from Partying. See also: Glossary  Wild CardsAt the end of the regular season, 1 Wild Card will be drawn at random from the remaining Teams in each Sub-League to receive a Postseason Birth.  Based EvolutionEvery Third Championship a Team wins will cause the Team and its Players to Evolve. Players that round the phylogenic Bases will get to go Home.  Free WillsThe bottom four finishing Teams in the League will receive an extra Will in that Season's Election.  All You Can EatFans are free to buy and discard Snack Slots in their Snack Pack. The number of Slots they have will determine their Payout Modifier for all Snacks. The less slots, the higher the Payout Modifier.  Community ChestAnytime 3000 Runs are accumulated league-wide, every Team will receive an Item Crate for a random active Player on their Team.  FairgroundsAll games have a chance of being Prize Matches, in which the winning Team will open an Item Crate.  Hype TrainShaming your opponent will build Hype in your Ballpark.  RatificationRenovations built by at least 18 Teams will be Ratified into Non-Physical Law for the entire League.  Hotel MotelThe Hotel Motel will occasionally create Holiday Innings during the Earlseason, where you Party instead of Score.  TurntablesBallpark: Any Win earned from a non-loss in this Ballpark during the Regular Season will be converted to an Unwin. League: Any Win earned from a non-loss during the Regular Season will be converted to an Unwin.  The UnderbracketEvery Postseason, the bottom finishing Teams will compete in the Underbracket while the top finishing Teams compete in the standard Overbracket.  Sun(Sun)All Wins and Unwins earned will be Squared.  TunnelsTunnels allow the Home Team to steal from the Away Team in this Ballpark.  Sun 30When a game enters Extra Innings, both Teams will immediately earn 1 Win.  BalloonsA small, permanent amount of negative eDensity is added for each Run or Win earned in this Ballpark.  Bird HotelWhen the Home Team parties, a number of Birds will come join the Party.  VoicemailWhen the Home Team is shut out in this Ballpark, they'll swap the worst Batter in their Lineup with the best Batter in their Shadows.  Sun .1Weather. Each Run scored is worth .1 more per Inning.
Roster Changes
Date Change Cause β22 LS00 + Uncle Plasma III 🦀 Gift Shop Uncle Plasma, Mint Edition β22 LS01 + Liquid Friend II 🦀 Gift Shop Liquid Friend, Mint Edition β22 LS02 + New Megan Ito II 🦀 Gift Shop New Megan Ito, Trader Edition β22 86 - Samothes Dembélé 🏝️ Thieves Guild (🏝️) β22 96 - Zeruel Kramer + Pedro Davids 🦀 Voicemail β22 99 + Scruffs Sunkcost 🦀 Postseason Birth β22 108 - Pedro Davids + Jon Halifax 🦀 Voicemail β22 EL00 - Silvaire Roadhouse + - 🦀 Will (🦀) Move β22 EL01 - Jon Halifax + Michelle Sportsman 🍬 Will (🦀) Equivalent Exchange β22 EL02 - Michelle Sportsman + Fairwood Patchwork 🎸 Will (🍬) Equivalent Exchange β22 EL03 - Jessica Telephone + Herring Winfield 👟 Will (👟) Equivalent Exchange β22 EL04 - Parker Parra 🎸 Blessing (🎸) Gachapon β22 EL05 - Liquid Friend II Dust β22 EL06 - James Mora II Dust β22 EL07 - New Megan Ito II Dust β22 EL08 - Uncle Plasma III Dust
Latesiesta
Renovations	+  Birdhouses +  Phantom Thieves' GuildIf the Home Team loses by 9 Runs in this Ballpark, they will steal from their opponent's Shadows. The Crabitat's Light Switch is now OFF The Crabitat was cleaned up! It is no longer Filthy.
Gift Shop	Uncle Plasma, Mint Edition: +Uncle Plasma III, Rotation -  DustThis Player is waiting to be Dusted off. +  YolkedThis Player is Yolked! Liquid Friend, Mint Edition: +Liquid Friend II, Lineup -  Dust +  Yolked New Megan Ito, Trader Edition: +New Megan Ito II, Rotation +  TraderThis Player has a chance of swapping Items with an opponent during a game.
Other Events	Ratification: -  Phantom Thieves' Guild Uncle Plasma and Liquid Friend are stronger together! Uncle Plasma III -  Dust +  Yolked Liquid Friend II -  Dust +  Yolked
Wills
Move   🦀 - Silvaire Roadhouse, Rotation   🦀 + Silvaire Roadhouse, Lineup Equivalent Exchange   🍬 - Michelle Sportsman + Jon Halifax   🦀 - Jon Halifax + Michelle Sportsman Equivalent Exchange   🦀 - Fairwood Patchwork + Michelle Sportsman   🍬 - Michelle Sportsman + Fairwood Patchwork Item Steal   Lorcan Smaht   - Underhanded Rock Socks of Strength   -  UnderhandedWhen this Pitcher allows a Home Run, the polarity of the Runs or Unruns will be flipped (Runs become Unruns, Unruns become Runs). Equivalent Exchange   🦀 - Jessica Telephone + Herring Winfield   🍬 - Herring Winfield + Jessica Telephone
Blessings
Handful Alternate Trust   Enid Marlow Overall 19.2 → 19.2   +  AlternateThis Player is an Alternate... Player is replaced with an alternate reality version, stats are randomized.   Kennedy Loser Overall 20.5 → 20.5   +  Alternate +  NegativeThis Player is a Negative. Negative players have negative eDensity.   Lorcan Smaht Overall 15.3 → 15.4   +  Alternate +  Negative   Fairwood Patchwork Overall 13.1 → 13.2   +  Alternate +  Negative   Alston Cerveza Overall 14.2 → 14.2   +  Alternate +  Negative Gachapon   🦀 - Parker Parra, Shadows   Parker Parra 14.1 → 14.5 Record Scratch   Avila Guzman   +  SkippingWhen this Player steps up to bat, they'll start with a randomized count. Subtractor Avoidance   Kaz Fiasco   +  SubtractorWhen this Player bats in a Run or Unrun, the polarity of the Run or Unrun will be flipped (Runs become Unruns, Unruns become Runs).
Post-election
Other Events	Liquid Friend II   +  Dust -  Yolked   🦀 - Liquid Friend II, Lineup James Mora II   +  Dust   🦀 - James Mora II, Lineup New Megan Ito II   +  Dust   🦀 - New Megan Ito II, Rotation Uncle Plasma III   +  Dust -  Yolked   🦀 - Uncle Plasma III, Rotation

In Season β22 the Baltimore Crabs finished first in the Mild League and first in the ILB, but lost to the Kansas City Breath Mints in the Mild League finals.

Despite breaking the single season win record set by the Baltimore Crabs in Season 6 the Crabs struggled against the eventual winners of the Internet Series, the Kansas City Breath Mints and their killer rotation. In the Election the Crabs lost Jon Halifax and Jessica Telephone, and gained Fairwood Patchwork and Herring Winfield. Unfortunately this was just in time for Fairwood, alongside Alston Cerveza, Kennedy Loser, Enid Marlow, and Lorcan Smaht, to be Alternated, and Parker Parra to join the Garages Shadows. Lastly Kaz Fiasco gained the Subtractor modification, and Avila Guzman gained the Skipping modification.

Starting Roster

Lineup	Rotation
Jessica Telephone Kennedy Loser Avila Guzman James Mora II Enid Marlow Zeruel Kramer Alston Cerveza Kaz Fiasco	Lorcan Smaht Montgomery Bullock Silvaire Roadhouse Finn James
Shadows
Axel Campbell Pierre Haley Rosa Holloway Miguel Peterson Robbins Schmitt Alexandria Hess Joyner Rugrat Javier Howe Elijah Glover Thomas Marsh Matheo Tanaka Bevan Underbuck Hercules Lincecum Samothes Dembélé Jon Halifax Parker Parra Squid Galvanic Samothes Thwompson Pedro Davids Ilhan Latch

Season Events

Stadium Renovations

The Crabs built 4 stadium renovations.

• Birdhouses - 18,731,062 Coins Spent
  • The Crabs built a bunch of new Birdhouses in The Crabitat.
  • The Crabitat gained the Birdhouses modification.
    • +  Birdhouses
• Phantom Thieves' Guild - 18,283,827 Coins Spent
  • The Crabs established a Thieves' Guild in The Crabitat.
  • The Crabitat gained the Phantom Thieves' Guild modification.
    • +  Phantom Thieves' Guild
• Light Switch - 18,200,091 Coins Spent
  • The Crabs flipped the Light Switch in The Crabitat.
  • The Crabitat's Light Switch is now OFF.
• Ballpark Cleanup - 17,886,879 Coins Spent
  • The Crabitat was cleaned up! It is no longer Filthy.

Gifts

A thank you Card from the Crabs for their gifts in season 22.

The Crabs received 3 Gifts! - 14,438,711 coins contributed

• Top Contributors:
  • ✨ Magic - 25%
  • 🌞 Sunbeams - 17%
  • 🍬 Breath Mints - 12%
• Uncle Plasma, Mint Edition - Wishlist #1
  • A Replica of Uncle Plasma is granted to the Crabs.
    • 🦀 + Uncle Plasma III, Rotation
  • Uncle Plasma III dusts off.
    • -  Dust
• Liquid Friend, Mint Edition - Wishlist #2
  • A Replica of Liquid Friend is granted to the Crabs.
    • 🦀 + Liquid Friend II, Lineup
  • Liquid Friend II and Uncle Plasma III are stronger together.
    • +  Yolked
  • Uncle Plasma III and Liquid Friend II are stronger together.
    • +  Yolked
  • Liquid Friend II dusts off.
    • -  Dust
• New Megan Ito, Trading Edition - Wishlist #3
  • A Replica of New Megan Ito is granted to the Crabs.
    • 🦀 + New Megan Ito II, Rotation
  • New Megan Ito II gained the Trader mod.
    • +  Trader

Note: Due to an unexpected deposit of coins into turning off their Light Switch, the Crabs pivoted to trying to get 3 gifts so they could use the Hard Boiled Detective Duo to be safe from consumers, and other teams responded generously to this request for assistance. That season's thank you card reflected several teams that reached out to assist, rather than the usual top 3.

Roster Changes

In Season 22 the Crabs were subject to two voicemails, and drained blood once.

• On Day 47 Kaz Fiasco siphoned some of Eduardo Woodman's defensive ability.
• On Day 96 Zeruel Kramer was replaced by an incoming Voicemail by Pedro Davids
• On Day 108 Pedro Davids was replaced by an incoming Voicemail by Jon Halifax
  • Davids' Voicemail was unusual since it occurred despite the Crabs scoring several runs in that game.

Notable Games

In Season 22 some notable games for the Crabs were:

• On Day 99 The Crabs set the new single season win record (Watch here on Before)
• On Day 103 The Prehistory Crabs Steal Home (Watch here on Before)

Election Outcomes

Wills

• 
  Move
  • The Crabs vote to move Silvaire Roadhouse to their Lineup.
  • The Crabs made a roster move.
    • 🦀 - Silvaire Roadhouse, Rotation
    • 🦀 + Silvaire Roadhouse, Lineup
  • Move - 35% of all Crabs Will Votes
    This Filing - 100% of Crabs Move Votes
    Final Odds - 35% chance of happening.
• 
  Equivalent Exchange
  • The Crabs vote to swap Michelle Sportsman and Jon Halifax.
  • The Breath Mints and Crabs made a trade.
    • 🍬 - Michelle Sportsman + Jon Halifax
    • 🦀 - Jon Halifax + Michelle Sportsman
  • Equivalent Exchange - 22% of all Crabs Will Votes
    This Filing - 11% of Crabs Equivalent Exchange Votes
    Final Odds - 2% chance of happening.
• 
  Equivalent Exchange
  • The Breath Mints vote to swap Fairwood Patchwork and Michelle Sportsman.
  • The Garages and Crabs made a trade.
    • 🎸 - Fairwood Patchwork + Michelle Sportsman
    • 🦀 - Michelle Sportsman + Fairwood Patchwork
  • Equivalent Exchange - 7% of all Breath Mints Will Votes
    This Filing - 41% of Breath Mints Equivalent Exchange Votes
    Final Odds - 3% chance of happening.
• 
  Equivalent Exchange
  • The Shoe Thieves vote to swap Jessica Telephone and Herring Winfield.
  • The Crabs and Shoe Thieves made a trade.
    • 🦀 - Jessica Telephone + Herring Winfield
    • 👟 - Herring Winfield + Jessica Telephone
  • Equivalent Exchange - 33% of all Shoe Thieves Will Votes
    This Filing - 8% of Shoe Thieves Equivalent Exchange Votes
    Final Odds - 3% chance of happening.

Blessings

• 
  Handful Alternate Trust blessed the Baltimore Crabs.
  • Enid Marlow's Alternate is called.
    • +  Alternate
    • Combined 19.2 → 19.2
  • Kennedy Loser's Alternate is called.
    • +  Alternate
    • Combined 20.5 → 20.5
  • Kennedy Loser's Alternate arrived with Negative.
    • +  Negative
  • Lorcan Smaht's Alternate is called.
    • +  Alternate
    • Combined 15.3 → 15.4
  • Lorcan Smaht's Alternate arrived with Negative.
    • +  Negative
  • Fairwood Patchwork's Alternate is called.
    • +  Alternate
    • Combined 13.1 → 13.2
  • Fairwood Patchwork's Alternate arrived with Negative.
    • +  Negative
  • Alston Cerveza's Alternate is called.
    • +  Alternate
    • Combined 14.2 → 14.2
  • Alston Cerveza's Alternate arrived with Negative.
    • +  Negative
  • The Crabs had 44% of the Votes
    They were the highest bidders.
    111,826 votes were cast.
• 
  Gachapon blessed the Seattle Garages.
  • Parker Parra was recruited by the Garages.
    • 🦀 - Parker Parra, Shadows
    • 🎸 + Parker Parra, Shadows

Post-Election

• Liquid Friend II faded away from the Crabs.
  • 🦀 - Liquid Friend II
• Liquid Friend II and Uncle Plasma III are weaker apart.
  • -  Yolked
• Liquid Friend II faded to dust.
  • +  Dust
• James Mora II faded away from the Crabs.
  • 🦀 - James Mora II
• James Mora II faded to dust.
  • +  Dust
• New Megan Ito II faded away from the Crabs.
  • 🦀 - New Megan Ito II
• New Megan Ito II faded to dust.
  • +  Dust

Season Overview

A Rock and a Hard Place

The following summary mixes canon events with community lore.
Despite the results of the last election, the Baltimore Crabs were looking forward to a strong season, and they delivered. Finally breaking the single season win record (set by the Baltimore Crabs in Season β6), for a total of 84 wins in a single season (though the non-loss record of 80-19 still remained with the Season 6 Crabs).

While Kennedy Loser’s haunts continued as normal, the Crabs were delighted to see some players they now knew were part of The Baltimore Crabs (Deceased). In particular Anna Trefeather made an appearance, and even got in the spirit of the Baltimore Crabs (Alive) by managing to steal home.

After The trade of long-time pitching Adalberto Tosser to the Flowers, the Crabs were already off to an unsteady start when there was a tragedy in Boston. On Season 22, Day 19, Brock Forbes was incinerated by a rogue umpire. A long time staple of the Crabs before his trade, many crabs mourned the loss of their Discipline era pitcher, though reflected that it was nice that at least Tosser was with him in Boston.

Despite their excellent season run, the Crabs struggled against the eventual winners of the Internet Series, the Kansas City Breath Mints, who had assembled a killer 2-player rotation of the 9-star Winnie Hess and the Underhanded Michelle Sportsman.

Election

In a series of trades that required a flow chart to follow the Crabs ended up losing both Jessica Telephone and Jon Halifax, and gaining Herring Winfield from the Shoe Thieves and Fairwood Patchwork from the Garages. Unfortunately this was just in time for Fairwood, alongside Alston Cerveza, Kennedy Loser, Enid Marlow, and Lorcan Smaht, to be Alternated, as well as Parker Parra ending up in the Garages Shadows.

As well, with failing to win the avoidance blessings the Crabs found that Kaz Fiasco had gained the Subtractor modification, and Avila Guzman had gained the Skipping modification.

Also someone stole Lorcan’s socks.

Overall the team now had some of the worst hitting in the league, but among the highest defense and baserunning. While stats minded Crabs Fans were not optimistic about their chances, their strategy of “If I can’t hit the ball you don’t get to either” had been successful in their season 13 run, so Season 23 was proving difficult to predict.